I have always had a large fear of public speaking. Sometimes it goes great and I fuckin ace it, then other times I turn as red as that "bang 6 girls a week" advertisement on this website and start shaking terribly. Today I had to give multiple presentations to professionals. I was super comfortable until about 5 minutes before, then boom! I couldn't control my face from heating up. Totally got in my head. And bombed all presentations.

In my career I do this every Monday. I've done Toastmasters and other remedies, but I can't stop the physiological response of my body to the fear of public speaking. This is directly related to pick-up too, if I get put on the spot sometimes I end up looking like a tomato and people immediately stop talking to me because I look too uncomfortable.

What can I do to feel more relaxed in these situations and not look like such a bitch. I have high-self esteem and a large group of friends, but feel as though this came from bad experiences in childhood or other subconscious thoughts.

I so badly want to start public speaking everyday and tear through this fear, but every time I do it, it always feels shitty. This is important to me, I would consider this my only fear.

Can anyone offer advice on this?

Hey Mellow.

I suffer from the exact same problem as you do and what I feel helps me cope is by being incredibly present with whatever it is that I'm doing.

Fear can only live in the anticipation of a future outcome. It results most usually from a form of cognitive distortion in which we predict the worst possible future outcome.

If you cannot find that presence then I suppose the next best step would be to try envisioning the best possible outcome instead of the worst. You will still be living in the future but instead of feeling fear it will be converted into excitement which may be a bit more beneficial to your situation.

Visualize the best possible outcome happening perfectly in your imagination and see whether this can help you.