First, a brief background (feel free to skip ahead). I've been studying pick up for the last few months. I read The Game, I've watched videos of the masters in the field, and I've lurked this forum for a bit. I feel I have a firm grasp of the basic concepts, but I didn't get over my approach anxiety until last week (I didn't sarge the girls, but I had a good conversation and I was confident). So I put together a routine and was ready to go out at and test it.

On to the point: Just before last call, I went into a bar that was half empty with an AFC friend of mine. We looked around for interesting girls, and I eventually saw an HB7 sitting kind of by herself, but near a group of dancing girls who she was friends with. I thought I made eye contact (she was far away), so I approached. I came in from her 9 o'clock, smiled and said "hey, I'm [my name]" whilst holding out my hand to shake hers. The HB7 then stood up, half smiling, said "hi" and started walking away. I tried to contain my surprise and said "you're not even gonna shake my hand?" in as cocky/funny a tone I could manage - trying to admonish her for her rudeness. She turned half way around and unenthusiastically slapped my hand without breaking her stride. I ejected and went back to my friend.

What did I do wrong? How did I get blown out so badly? I didn't even get to run any game. The only thing I can think of is that I violated the three-second rule and she might have noticed that I was lurking around looking for girls. My AFC friend suggested it was girls night out, but that doesn't explain the absolute blow out. Either way, I'm not mad about it. I know I have decent game, but I want to know what I was doing wrong so I can improve it.

I'm trying to learn the game so read with care..hehe. THe opening was maybe to bland. And instead of asking her why shes leaving you could ignore it and jump into some trick, funny fact, or random fluff talk. Showing her that leaving is not an option.

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"I'm the man with no name... Zapp Brannigan."
"if I said you had a beautiful body would you take your pants off and dance around a bit?"
"The quickest way to a girl's bed is through her parents. Have sex with them and you're in."

I'm gonna break this down for you and I won't lie, it's gonna piss you off but hear me out.

This looks like a lot of work to do but trust me, with practice you're going to amaze yourself. I thought I was the shit after the reading I did, seminars I watched and people I talked to but when it came to the field I just couldn't pull it off. You see, if you cram all this knowledge into your head it's just too much and you'll forget a pretty large percentage of it so you need to put what you've learned into practice while you learn it, step by step.

You will make mistakes - lots of them. I made some hilarious mistakes, my wingman constantly called me on what I was doing wrong and yeah, it pissed me off. But, I learned from it and now it's smooth sailing so now I'm kinda thankful for him pushing me. The way I see it, the more mistakes you make, the faster you learn. Someone here has a short signature which speaks volumes - "A good lawyer knows the law; a great lawyer knows the judge". Nomatter how much you read and study it will never compare to real life experience. Go out again and correct your mistakes bits at a time if you have to, don't try and do it all at once. You'll learn a lot faster and it will stay with you for life.

Now, let's have a look at your approach.

1. You approached with your wing. Girls are made uneasy when 2 or more guys approach them at once. If you're gonna introduce her to your wing you should open the set first and have him come in later on and ask how you all know each other.

2. Social proof - you walked into the bar, saw her checking you out and approached straight away. She knew you were scouting for girls and it was a bad time to try it aswell, it was the end of the night and she hadn't seen you in there earlier so you can imagine what she was thinking... "this guy only wants one thing". You need to interact with others before approaching her, they notice this stuff. Everyone is drinking and relaxed, and they will all talk to you, shake your hand, hug you etc... if she sees you interacting and having fun with other people she'll want to know who this fun, outgoing guy is and how he knows all these people.

3. You opened her and not the entire set. Blanking her friends = bad. Remember, pay attention to her friends and give her the cold shoulder at first, she should be working for your attention not the other way around! Even if you open the set and get them laughing, I don't advise introducing yourself until you know she's interested in you; if she tells you her name shake her hand and tell her yours. Don't be shy to kiss the back of her hand and give her a bit of eye contact, they love it! If she gives you a funny look just ask her friends if she's always this shy, and test out to see how fun her friends are instead. If you start hugging her friends and stuff it'll drive her crazy, but in a good way... just make sure your attention is spread out evenly.

4. Your opening was predictable. This isn't the most important thing as it's not so much what you say as how you say it... but yeah, how many other guys do you think did the exact same thing that night? Ask her if she's shy, and call her out for looking at you and not coming to say hi... "I can't believe I had to walk all the way over here to talk to you, you can be so lazy sometimes!" Get her laughing and she'll pretty much do all the conversation for you.

Just one more thing... false time constraints are one of your best tools so use them! Tell her that you have to get back to your friends in a second. It'll relax her because she knows you'll be leaving soon. It's a powerful tool and I'd say it's pretty much essential. If she really likes you she'll actually pull you back into the set as you're leaving, and if this happens it means you have her chasing you and she's now wrapped around your little finger! Have fun while you're learning, it'll really pay off.

Dalziel pretty much covered it all, but you should look into getting a wing with some experience/ who is learning with you so you can push eachother.

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Discipline - Dedication - Desire

I like what D posted about the situation. My opinion is to work on your INNER GAME. I'm still working on my INNER GAME and it works! It pays of because you'll be more competant and know how to do things. Now, I can call what my friends are doing wrong in pick-up. Just like D said, "It doesn't matter what you say but how you say it!" That is true in many ways! I can walk up to a HB7 or HB9 and come up with a ridiculous thing. This is a key I figured out-look them straight in the eye and smile. So, say if she says, "What's that?" Be a man and repeat what you said. Don't be a pussy and tell her something else. This isnt being congruent. Being incongruent will only lead you to suffering. Be REAL with yourself and your expectations.

First, find out your traits that draw people to you. Second, think of traits will draw HB's to you (funny, confident, intelligence, social proof, good sense of humor, etc... etc...). Third, think of qualities that you want in a FRIEND (a male celebrity preferally) then do the same with a GIRLFRIEND. Once you achieved those things-your starting to work on your INNER GAME (the inner you). There are rules of working on your INNER GAME also.

1) Don't give a fuck whether or not you blow the set.
2) ALways smile and joke around; show the woman you're fun to hang out with.
3) Keep strong eye-contact but not a staring match.
4) Increase the things that make you interesting as a person.
5) Don't worry whether or not your saying the right shit or not. If she likes you, then she likes you-if not then drop her, move on to the next).
6) Be a REAL man and show her your genuineness and be in charge of the situation. Don't let her get away with murder and be a MAN to be a leader. Once you've shown a woman you can be leader of men, and have good social proof along with social intelligence; you'll much further.
7) Speak loud and slower. Speaking loud will make them hear you and appear more confident. If you studder or mess you your words (NO BIGGIE!).

There is a great site you can go to: http://www.attractology.com/innergame/

I hope you got alot out of this!

I would like to point out some good things you did though.

1) You approached 9 o'clock (never surprise a woman by approaching them from behind or anywhere you'll scare her).
2) You tried to recover but failed. What you just did was try to validate her for leaving you. She had a bitch-shield on totally and you must break through those!

Read some posts about breaking through a woman's bitch-shield. You might find them useful!

ALright man, see ya later!

_________________
"Women Love What They Can't Have!"

My official underground website

http://f4fc0878.linkbucks.com

Thanks for the advice, everyone.
Actually, everything you said made sense. Like I said, I'm not sweating losing this set, I just want to improve my game. Getting criticism is a part of that. The only thing I disagree with is that I didn't approach with my friend (he hung back) and I was planning on using a false time constraint, but I didn't have enough time, unless I were to use it as an opener. That's really beside the point though.
I think this is definitely happening to me. I had a hard time trying to remember my whole routine, but I didn't want to go in without one and risk bombing mid-sarge. I'll try and take it piece by piece from now on and use my failures as a learning tool.
This is true. I hate canned openers though, so I tried to go for something more casual. I forgot the whole "be the exception to the rule" thing and failed to differentiate myself.
How should I have dealt with that? I'm going to read up on bitch sheilds, but I thought I was rolling with the situation and making fun of her for leaving. Should I have not acknowledged the fact that she was walking away? I also want to re-emphasize that this whole thing happened really fast. Anyway, thanks for the advice.

If a girl blanks you like that again just tell her she'll never get a man if she's this rude to every one she's attracted to.

If you ask me, this was your biggest mistake... especially if it was
your first approach of the night. Was it?

There's no telling how much shit that girl had gone through that
night before you came along and said hi. She may have just had
a drunken fight with her boyfriend. She may have been hit on 100
times that night between the hours of 10 and 2. She may be plain
tired... who knows.

At this point, she's probably going to think that anyone who
approaches her so directly just before last call hasn't had any
luck that night and is making a last ditch effort to get laid.

I only browsed the other advice but it seemed to be on point.
Read it and take note. But you are putting yourself at a huge
disadvantage by starting to talk to bar/club goers so late in
the night.

Start early and build up momentum.

I would have to agree with A. If you went in there in the beginning and started working the ROOM then you'll be ready and set to game this HB. Thing is that you went to her directly and not indirectly. If she's sitting there thinking to herself, "Wow, every guy is gonna hit on me!" She's gonna def. put up a bitch-shield. Wouldn't you? I think so! A attractive woman gets tiresome when several guys hit on her all night. So they put up defenses. So when you said whatever to make her come back and talk with you-this was neediness. This showed her that she had power over you. NOT GOOD! Have power over her and next time-talk with her friends and make sure it's not obvious that you're gaming. Just create social proof by talking to many people as you can. With this you'll be able to re-open any HB in the club\bar. Don't be desperate because the word "Desperate" was all over your head. This is why she blew you out of the set.

Until next time dude-chow!

_________________
"Women Love What They Can't Have!"

My official underground website

http://f4fc0878.linkbucks.com

Here's my take on the subject. When approaching, remember to stand out IMMEDIATELY. Saying, "Hi my name is ___" you just blew yourself out of the water. Let THEM ask YOU what your name is. Instead, you should have opened with an opinion question like, "would you date a guy who still talked to his ex?" or "if your gf makes out with girls does that mean she's cheating?" Go right into it before you say anything else. Dont even say hi. This shows that youre not one of the other 20 guys that comes up to them and introduces themselves because he's looking to pick them up. These questions sound trite and repetitive, but they catch the HBs off guard as well as gives them the opportunity to do what they love best: give their opinions about shit. Also, remember its not so much what you say but how you say it. You can go up to an HB10 and say something ridiculous like, "I just saw a guy walking a penguin outside" but if you say it with enough enthusiasm itll come off as funny and is a great ice breaker. Remember, these girls are bored as fuck. Theyre waiting for someone to come up to them with something to offer other than the, "Hi my name is shit brains. Where are you from? What do you do?" So STAND OUT!

like metnioned earlier dont open with hi my name is
u can ask for her name but dont tell her urs, when u let her find out your name on her own this will show u if she got any interest in u, so if u aproach her and ask for her name and she doesnt ask u for ur name in the next 5 mins u should just walk off to another set, when she asks u for ur name she is showing her interest to u right away, and if she is interested she WILL find out ur name