I don't know if this is the exact right place to put this but...

my ex-ish person (idk what to call her, we only went out twiceish and they were both simple and casualish) texted me.

Some details:

Met this girl at a college fair at my school. We went for pizza. Got her number. We talked and texted. Went to a coffee place, then just talked at the library for a bit. But I was losing interest, and she told me her brother was (or is- i cant remember) in a gang. So, I stopped talking to her (because I wasn't that interested, and might as well stop before I mess things up, and her brother beats me up). We did text after that, but it mostly just slowed down (maybe she was losing interest too, but idk it didn't seem to much like she lost interest)

But later, she got hotter (I guess this was around a few months ish)... but I still didn't speak to her.

Anyway, today I was meeting my friend with the same name. So I tried calling my friend with the same name, but my ex picks up (because I called the wrong number). So I tell her I'm at the (the place me and my friend were going) and she sounds confused. I realize it's her, in the confusion I hang up. I cringe.



Hours later, I get a text from the same ex "heyyy"

I figure I can get a meet up, but how do I keep her from losing interest.

Idk if I even want to, I just sort of wanted to share my story. See what you're opinions are, and if you think I should date her. Or what you would do?
Any advice?

Well, I thought you didn't want to date the girl? Now you do?

The brother in a gang thing doesn't sound like a deal-killer to me... but whatever.

Explaining that call and the hang up will be fun. I guess you could play it like you got disconnected or the call dropped or something...

Yeah, I kind of want to date her now because she got hotter. I guess that makes me shallow as heck though, because I don't like her and we don't have much in common.

I explained the call already, I just told the truth (meant to call my friend with the same name basically) and she was cool with it.

We've been texting, and we might go out on monday.

How does the brother in a gang not sound like a deal-killer? Would you go out with a girl whose brother is/was in a gang. Honestly, that's the thing that makes me not want to date her (otherwise I'm thinking why not).

That's not shallow, that is pretty normal for a guy. As long as you manage her expectations well and don't promise you want to marry her when all you want is a bang, I don't see why it would be a problem.

Stop texting. Texting destroys opportunities. I have never understood people who text with girls for ages. You will never build rapport properly via text, only fuck it up. She's hooked? Good. Set a date. Work on from there.

And about the brother... Dude, you don't even know him. As long as you treat his sister with respect, I don't see why he would have such an interest/a problem with his sisters dating life... Should he actually get in touch with you and tell you to fuck off, the situation would be different (although me personally, would try to win him over if that unlikely case actually was to happen).

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Also, I forgot to say, she is not your ex. Don't call her like that. Hell, it doesn't even sound as if you did her already! Treat her like a new acquaintance, with the bonus of already knowing a thing or two about her. I mean, if your last interactions happened such a long time ago, you have kind of "reset" your relationship. now go and get her mannn!

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Yeah, ex was just the term I used because idk what else to call her on here. Thanks for the advice, man!

Thanks for the advice about everything, I won't worry about her brother for now.







I guess topic closed, thanks everyone