EDIT
FollowIng on from my thread about my girlfriend wanting us to just be best friends like
we was before the relationship ( relationship for 7 months ) i talked to her and said
if you think we cant be mature and get over arguments we should really and ideally end it
she replied after a few messages saying that the relationship would be perfect in a few years
but she doesnt feel right and if she wanted it to work she would have instantly said rather than
thinking about it as to weather we should work out or not.

My question now as as we've officially broken up is that i obviously love her and i want her back
but im not going to go AFC and beg for her back. We have the same friendship circle (same
SPAM group) and we were best friends before. How shall i behave with her, shall i go back
to being bestfriends with her or shall i completely cut her out. The dilemma is that being
best friends with her will mean we end on good terms and there might be a chance in
the future however it will hurt me to see/hear her with another guy plus she might only see us
in that way and think she can get away with this. Being cold with her
might come across afc like i am really affected my life has crashed however she might
feel that shes lost somthing big and return.


Calling all PUAs to help a man in need.
















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So me and this amazing girl was the bestest, literally the bestest of friends at the start of university.
We both study law she is a straight HB10 and is 19 , shes never had a relationship before and before
she met me she was a virgin. We started dating halfway through the year so have been going out for
6 months now. Ive met all her family shes met mine, we study the same course and have the
same friends ( same SPAM group with her and my uni friends ). Recently we both went on different
holidays it was going well but long distance and our insecurities got the best of us i turned AFC as i made
a few accusations and so did she we knew they werent true and solved them. However the damage had
been done ( plus another argument before that we had ) We met yesterday and said that we are both
over the argument we still love each other however it just doesnt feel right anymore - she said usually
she would wait for me to text her all day,or she would get upset if i didn't message her but now she doesn't
and the 'spark' between us isnt there.


This was a mutual thing we both felt the same however deep down inside me i really want it to work out
i know she does too but we felt that we cant force the feeling of a relationship when we dont feel like it.
We talked about how we was best friends before and that we could easily stay loyal have sex and kiss
but just without the commitment factor. In basic terms i think she just wants the benefit of a relationship
i.e sex and security but just doesn't want to commit ( commitment for her being texting calling and those
behaviours you would think about which would affect your partner).

I really like her and at the minute i feel the same as in i cant be bothered to text her and smother her
but i feel like i want to make it work more than her and i truly do love her . Ive said to her that if we want
to be friends, we cant have sex and that right now i dont want to speak to her till furthur notice - No
contact rule.


What do you guys make of this situation, do you think i made the right move for no contact or should i
go about it another way by dating as friends ( she wants us to see each other once a week and try build it )
and how do i go about winning her back and getting that initial attraction phase back with her so that we
can move on.

So, basically your relationship matured and you hit the "normal" phase in a relationship(Honeymoon phase is over)... Because of this you both turn around and assume you've lost attraction?

Just sounds like you got comfortable with each other and didn't need to be constantly in touch messaging 24/7, talking all the time and spending every day and night by each others side. Got news for you: It's normal and generally happens at the 6-9 month mark.

Honestly, carry on with a relationship and see if you actually do love each other. If not then call it quits and eject because I sincerely doubt you could have a "friends with benefits" kind of relationship. That shit will plague you and make you wonder if she's fucking some different dude every night she's out with the girls or has someone on the side.

Either carry on or dump her. Having FWB with someone you love never ends well. FWB only works if you're just in it for the sex.

Bruv. Stop lying to yourself. It's not mutual at all, you are infatuated with this girl. You're really not happy about the situation. If she suggested that you went back to the way you were before, you would jump at the chance. If it really was mutual, you would say "No, let's keep it casual".

Basically she wants you to stop texting and calling so much. It really is that simple.

Stay busy. What do you do in your free time aside from thinking about / texting this girl?