| Well… I am sure we are all aware of “Friends Disarming”, but last night I did something I am worried about this morning.
Last night was my friend’s birthday, and so I found myself in a pub with a group of guys talking about football. I was pretty bored, I hate football, and the night rolled on. After drinking a few beers and two shots of Sambuca, my head was buzzing. I didn’t go out to pick up, and the place wasn’t target rich. There were two or so HBs, but they were wrapped around their boy friends and I couldn’t see any windows. Then a girl and a guy entered. I’d say she was a HB6, but I am sure most here would call her an HB8, (I see that one used a lot) but that’s not important.
The guy was fat and poorly dressed in a boring grey and black jumper. This would be easy right? I let them sit at the bar for a moment, I let them order their drinks. I approached when the bar tender went out back and used my ample time to get talking to them both. She wasn’t very open to my good conversation, she’d look to the guy and he’d look back. It was clear I had to win him over, so I did. Then I told them that they should come and sit with my table and they did.
The boys greeted the girl, and grunted at the guy and it wasn’t long before he became very disconnected. He was slowly sipping away at orange juice and looking bored. I was pretty sure that if he wasn’t stimulated soon he’d want to go. He tapped her on the leg and whispered something, to which she replied “in a minuet”. I had to work on him, get him involved, or he was going to make her leave. As he was sitting on the edge of another table, out of the social loop, I started talking to him and then said ‘Hey, bring your chair to this table, I can’t hear you so well’. He moved over and I worked on him for 10 minuets or so, asking about things he liked and smiling Etc.
Then he told me he was gay! Well, how should one react? He was with a HB after all. “Wow really’ I said ‘I always wanted a gay friend. Tell me do I look hot?’. The girl who had been paying attention to the conversation while pretending to look away suddenly burst into laughter. ‘What!’ she said ‘You can’t ask him that!’. “Why not?’ I said before turning back and saying ‘I‘d never have thought you were gay. You don’t make the most of yourself. I look gayer than you! Do you like my scarf? Do you like Rock Hudson?’. All this banter was fine she opened up more and was enjoying the madness, and he was happier to sit with us. It was fine.
By talking to the gay guy I found out some stuff about the girl, stuff that I used to cold read her, she was very shocked and amazed, he was just smiling to himself knowingly.
Anyway, the hours fall off the clock and before I know it I am at my friends playing poker with, the girl and the gay guy. By this time I had won the gay guy over so much that he would side with me on any argument and we had a few little conspiracies going on her, such as stealing her chips.
He was out of the poker game pretty early on and was very bored. Then it started! This gay guy kept Kino'ing me! It started off slow, tapping me with his foot, placing a hand, moving in for side of body contact. I didn’t like it, it made me feel ill, but what was I to do? Kill the vibe? So I just didn’t acknowledge it, I played Poker as if I didn’t feel a thing. It got a bit much for me at points, and I would get up and make a drink or hide in the toilet shivering. Later I fell out of the game and become the dealer, just to keep some distance from him. Luckily at around 2AM he went home, thank fuck! She on the other hand wanted to stay.
After the game of poker I put on my coat and she said ‘Hey, which way are you walking home?’.
As I walked her home on my arm she got a text message. It was from the Gay Guy. Supposedly I am pretty hot and he hopes I call him soon. I laughed it off, feeling sick inside, and told her that I was just trying to cheer him up, as he was so moody earlier in the evening. She said she knows what I did, and he knows I am straight, and if he gets hurt its his own stupid fault. I walk her to her door, grab her number and get a K-close.
What a night...
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CHAT
