| It was late at night, I hadn't really wanted to go out too much, but some friends were at a local dance club text me and drag me out. I don't drink anything.
I go in for a few minutes, get bored, decide to leave. I'm trying to convince a girl I had met a few weeks before to hang out, unsuccessfully.
I walk to the other side of town, where the local university is located. Right outside one of the "classier" student bars, is a bake sale for drunk college kids.
The girl (different one from who I was texting) immediately stands out - about average height, maybe 120-130 pounds, blonde, cute, but not hot face (I would call it "slut face", but that's apparently a bad word here...) - wearing a tight, high-top, showing off her midriff and her very large chest. My initial impression is that she's almost certainly sassy. She turns out to be a 21 year old coed.
I decide, right then and there, that I want her.
I look at the group, and at her, and I ask, "What is this for?"
"A new yoga center!"
I try to think of something that will emotionally stick quickly - I decide on, "Oh, I hate yoga".
This sets off sassy girl, who sees a new challenge to be conquered.
She tries to convince me the food is good, and I should try it. I say that I want pizza, which it isn't apparent that they have. She points to some muffins and says, "These are pizza muffins!", thinking she's victorious.
I tell her I have no cash on me. She points to an SPAM across the street - it's for my bank, and says, "You can go to the SPAM".
I tell her, "Why would I possibly go to an SPAM to buy one muffin?"
Then I say, "You should buy me a muffin." - a standard statement whenever a girl tries to get me to buy something.
"I'll buy one for you if you buy one too", she says.
We're going back and forth, we've definitely got a vibe. I wasn't 100% sure if she was just good at sales, or if she was into me (hint, it was the latter).
During this time, my buddy is walking a 10-15 minute walk over to me from the previous bar.
I know this, and I decide, two muffins for the price of one is good, and now she's invested too.
She goes, "Wait, you'll really go to the SPAM if I buy you a muffin????" and I make it clear I will.
I get my money, and come back. As promised, she takes money out of her wallet and buys a muffin too, just as my buddy arrives.
We eat our muffins, and I sass her some more. I grab her number, telling her she's trouble and telling her to put her name in as [Girl Name] Sassy.
We walk away that night.
The next day, I text her about 2 or 3 PM. Text game was moderately good, with a definite sassy vibe, but not amazing. She's still responsive though and I can tell she's generally having fun. We're responding at maybe 1 or 2 texts an hour.
I ask her what she's doing at about 8 PM, thinking that we can go get a drink. She says she's studying for the LSAT.
I tell her that that sounds boring, and that we should meet for a drink. We do. She's dressed as she was the night before - clothes with obvious midriff showing, short summer blouse.
She definitely looks like she's in the mood to be fucked.
We have several drinks, getting flirtier and more aggressive as the night goes on. After about an hour and a half, I ask her if she wants to, "Go watch Aladdin" (my most recent, "let's go fuck" excuse) at my house. She's a little hesitant, wants another drink first. Comes off as the type who likes to be intoxicated for a first encounter with a new guy to make it less nervous - sure, whatever, fine.
We drink the last drink and we leave. We have a very brief, but aggressive make-out session shortly outside the bar. It's a bit of a hike to my apartment, but we're still intoxicated when we get there.
We went into my apartment.
We did not watch Aladdin.
Without going into a lot of detail, this girl was fantastic. Super aggressive/fought back, former dancer (ballerina, not like stripper). Strict no sex rule on the first meeting, but she ensured I had a good time.
Her chest was better than expected.
I'd rate the whole process 9.5/10, one of my best pickups when taking into account attractiveness, vibe, amount of effort expended. I'm sure I will see her again.
Best line of the night:
(said in a seductive voice), "Welcome back to undergrad".
My undergrad experience (2003-2008), well before I learned about pickup, was certainly nothing like this.
Welcome back indeed.
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