I just got a new job, and picking up one of the waitresses was going great. I would flirt with her a lot, she would flirt back, very playful stuff. After work everyday, she would come find me and give me a hug before she left.

Now, I'm a shorter guy, not very muscular, but pretty attractive. One of my male coworkers is kinda giving me a hard time and can sort of get away with it although I win a lot of the banter. The problem is one day he saw us hugging and made a big deal out of it, and for whatever reason, she's never hugged me again at the end of her shift. Then on break he tries to sit in between us and I stop it, but all his interaction is obviously making her less interested in me, or at least not willing to show it.

I took a psychology class and its take on it would be that I'm lower on the "social hierarchy" in this job since I'm new, and because this guy is going to be a dick, even some what jokingly, it's fucking up my chances?

I'm not sure what to do here, but it's to the point that she actually canceled a date after work tonight, after this guy bugged us on our break.

It's called an AMOG. Someone who thinks their volume is equal to their value.

This douche, usually unsuccessful with women. This person will try to make new comers feel awkward, as they know everyone and have pissed off all of them to some extent already.

They, love new targets to abuse like you, as new targets don’t know everyone else or the group social dynamic. They are essentially acting as Head Cock Blocker.

Win him over. The best things you can do in this case is simply befriend the guy. Include him in the conversation and build rapport with him and find some commonalities.

To do that, keep a solid frame, maintain solid eye contact, be absolutely fearless, speak loudly and mimic his body language, til he breaks.

Position yourself between him and your target, as he has done to you, every chance you get.

After you've done that get the fuck away from him and get back to the woman.

Once you’re in, no need to talk to him as he’ll likely chew your ear off all the fucking time, seeing you as his new buddy, or try to hang out and just make things awkward.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Your are getting cockblocked and made to look beta. He is asserting his social dominance as he sees you as threat and you confirmed it when he seen you hugging the woman. Iv been in this situation plenty of times in my life. Heywood Jablowme gave you some very sound advice. I personally wouldn't try to befriend him but I would keep a solid fearless frame, remain very calm and laid back almost laughing at his need to assert dominance. If he trys to take the piss Id beat him at his own game. If he knows your not intimidated and can give as good as you get he'll either want to be your friend or ignore you and call you dick behind you back.

Heywood Jablowme advice of winning him over is probably the best approach however

It's hard to explain, because he's somewhat helpful at the job now. If I ask him to do something thats not really asking too much he'll do it instead of giving resistance like I thought he would.

Damage is already done anyway, it really bums me out she doesn't say goodbye to me anymore. She still comes to find me to take her break with her, but I can't think of how to reinitialize kino with her. My only chance is when we're on break, sitting on stools together for about 4 minutes. Nothing comes to mind other than stupid stuff like "palm reading". At this point, even asking for a hug doesn't feel right, but I could feign confidence and do it anyway? I don't know.

TBH you don’t seem very alpha at all. I mean asking for a hug! WTF dude . Sounds like the chick has friend zoned you. The guy is not being a dick any more because he knows your beta and no threat to him. Sounds like you don’t really get game at all and have a lot of learning to do.

You need to learn how to be cocky and funny, you then reinitialize kino as your joking around and teasing her. Read David' D's ebook Attraction isn’t a choice. It explains all of this in great detail and you will understand exactly where your going wrong.

Today is the day to stop being a coward.
Accurate statement. Fix it.

As far as kino goes, that's your job Bro, men are expected to take the risks and lead the way through the entire series of physical steps towards sex. This gives the girl the power to reject him at any step on the way.

Start over slowly. Accidental arm touch = While talking to her you can lightly brush against her arm. You can touch her arm with the back of your hand to make a point in the conversation.

Step it up a little, briefly touch her shoulder while chatting with her, like your pulling her in to hear you better.

The more often you touch, the quicker she gets used to your touches.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Today is the day to stop being a coward.
Accurate statement. Fix it.

As far as kino goes, that's your job Bro, men are expected to take the risks and lead the way through the entire series of physical steps towards sex. This gives the girl the power to reject him at any step on the way.

Start over slowly. Accidental arm touch = While talking to her you can lightly brush against her arm. You can touch her arm with the back of your hand to make a point in the conversation.

Step it up a little, briefly touch her shoulder while chatting with her, like your pulling her in to hear you better.

The more often you touch, the quicker she gets used to your touches.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Have you tried going back to building rapport and comfort?

I'm not sure how far asking for hugs and flirting is going to get you in this case, but running the cube on her might really open it back up, if you haven't done much of that stuff yet. Deep questions like like "If you could pick one person living or dead to have dinner with, who would it be?" and "What's the most exciting thing you've ever done?" might get her thinking you're the most interesting guy she's ever met again.

Since you started off so well, you might even want to get her alone and start talking about kissing. "Do you remember your first kiss? What was it like? If you were in kissing school, what grade would your kissing teacher give you? Really? Let's find out, etc."

And of course keep the kino up from the beginning. Take her hand and lead her somewhere like you are a boss. Touch her lower back, etc.

I don't feel like I'm doing that bad as far as conversation goes, kino is like another language to me though.
As far as how I talk to her and every other waitress, she loves it.

For example she came up to me and looked a little frustrated, I asked "You alright?" Yeah... "Look at the bright side! At least you make a good air freshener."

I'll get that book, I'm new to this and need all the help I can get. I really need help with kino though, I don't even understand the arm touching.

Yeh that's right dude. ACT like an alpha. That'll help your cause. It seems to me she hugged you because you're probably like her little brother or something and you are reading too much into it. She's not that into you and is trying to tell you as sweetly as possible to leave her the fuck alone. Don't even think about touching her either you fucking little creep.

Shit or get off the pot. If you think she likes you invite her out. Hugs and banter mean nothing if you don't act on it.

Haha right, her way of asking me to leave the alone is to come and find me, just me, out of all her friends here thats she's known for months and take her break with me (every break, by the way)? When she gave me her number?

Just because I only list my problems in this thread, and downplay everything I'm doing right, for the sake of time, doesn't give you any reason to be an ass. If you have some kind of bone to pick with me, feel free to PM me, leave your tough guy bullshit out of my thread because I won't be acknowledging it from this point on.

Thanks for all the help guys, I think I figured out she's just shy and really hated the attention we were getting from our coworkers. Asked her to hang after work and got into kissing about 20 minutes later, I was just over thinking everything and didn't know how to react to what was going on.

Thanks for posting this. I was really lacking confidence needed to push forward. I gotta start sarging again. As for the OP, just push forward. Ask her out. She likes spending time with you, just give her the chance to spend more with you.

You both are so right. I had this all along and it's just that I myself get all pussy and insecure inside for nothing. It's just a downward spiral and I really got to work on it. Sometimes you just really gotta man up. I'm not usually afraid of rejection but I guess in my mind this was a special case since she's a coworker and not some girl I met at a university.

Man, I just showed up at work and a week later start dating the hottest chick there. Smooth sailing from here, thanks guys.