Tinder girl doesn't want to meet up, does this solve it?



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PostPosted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 4:22 am 
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Alright...

So we all know how it goes, you match a really hot girl on Tinder and send some messages back and forth, got her number and now you wanna arrange a date. She keeps on texting you but every time you suggest meeting up, see makes up some bullshit excuse why she can't. I had it a couple of times that girls honestly told me they are kinda scared to meet up because they have never met someone of tinder in person. So I tried and asked that girl I was texting the other day that was again making up some shit why she can't meet up, if she ever met some one of Tinder.

The answer was quite interesting. Even though not what I excepted.

The conversation didn't end in the best way, but at least it shows me how hot girls are being approached on Tinder. What are your opinions on that conversation, did it save me from even wasting more time, because if she would have been interested in meeting up she should at least show some afford.

Me:
btw did you ever meet someone of tinder?
Her:
Yeah I've met 3 brazilians off tinder. Ended up becoming really good friends with all of them.
Me:
haha I’m curious how did you end up making friends of tinder? ;)
Her:
Hahaha what do you mean?
Me:
i mean its such a superficial app, you’re either looking to date someone or to hookup. don’t you agree?
Her:
True it is superficial. But if you hang out with someone and the chemistry is not there does not mean you cannot be friends.
I think they like me because they don't have a lot of people to speak Portuguese to haha.
Me:
and I guess you really appreciate practicing your portuguese too ;) I don’t know i had dates with not a lot of chemistry and it just ended that we never ever met each other.
Her:
Hahaha that is fine if you do not believe me.
Me:
no i think its just a different mindset, I just had the feeling that you’ve never meet someone of tinder in person
Her:
Oh no I have haha but it is hard because everyone wants to meet up so you have to distinguish between the people who are genuine and who aren't
Me:
I agree, you don’t want to end up sitting at a dinner table with a total creeper :D
so what is a genuine person for you?
Her:
Hahaha exactly.
To me a genuine person (from tinder) is someone who is honest about what they want. I've met up with guys before (besides the brazilians) who we hang out and because I didn't hook up with them on the first date they stopped talking to me or the next time they asked to hang out they would ask me to come over and watch a movie which I know what that means. So basically someone who isn't just focused on fucking haha.
And acts like they are interested in talking to me when they really aren't.
Me:
Damn girls finally cracked that “movie” code :/
but at least theres a little honesty in “lets watch a movie” as everybody knows whats going on and if you’re not on the same page is pretty much over
*its pretty much over
Her:
Exactly. But it is annoying that I wasted my time. which don't get me wrong, I know I'm not going to find a boyfriend off tinder. But that doesn't mean I want to hook up with randos who take me to dinner one time and expect me to put out haha.
Me:
I agree probably not the best way to find a girlfriend, depends how it goes tho. I guess it takes girls a little longer to feel comfortable enough to take it to the next level. I feel like if you’re having a good time and enjoy spending time with someone why leaving out the fun part ;)
Her:
Gahahahaha "a little longer" as in not within the first 30 minutes of meeting like most guys
Me:
well if you give the other person a heads up right away and its clear its just a hookup thats alright but if youve been texting a little bit and agree to hangout its a pretty ballsy move to aim for sex on the first date ;)
Her:
yet a good majority still do it!
Me:
might work sometimes... but i think theres nothing wrong with saying it out loud, because if the girls is down she might signal that too ;)
Her:
Sending me pictures of guys asking her on tinder right away if she wants to have Sex
Me:
I see you get what I’m trying to say ;)
Appreciate your honesty tho, If you still want to hangout let me know. I’m not gonna push it further as I’ve been asking you a couple of times now. and my time is also valuable to me ;-)
Her:
Ha okay.


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 12:33 pm 
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Pretty philosophical and not very playful... You need to be more fun on Tinder.

Also, ending it the way you did was the female equivalent of saying "well I'm not getting in your pants anytime soon, so I'll see ya"


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 08, 2014 4:21 am 
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I agree with the last post. even if that's in the back of the girls mind you bringing it up won't maker attracted to you


this has worked for me before I deleted the tinder App (too busy)

Do you really need your friends approval before you meet a guy...


if she asks you what you have in mind... Say "well nothing naughty, im the classy kind of guy"


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 08, 2014 4:28 am 
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"Appreciate your honesty tho, If you still want to hangout let me know. I’m not gonna push it further as I’ve been asking you a couple of times now. and my time is also valuable to me ;-) "

you sound like a normal nice dude which is good, but it comes across to her that your not strong/bold, and it could lower your value "asking a couple of times now" and this statement makes you sound a little desperate as well. she's not stupid. And if she is loose her. And if she's flakey don't waste your time.

this kind of talk is good when your in a relationship not when your building attraction...

-felipe89


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PostPosted: Tue Jul 08, 2014 2:34 pm 
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I haven't play any tinder game yet, hope there are more posts on this for me to learn.

Great advice guys by the way.

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PostPosted: Thu Jul 10, 2014 7:20 pm 
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Alright guys, I really appreciate all your advices and its def true that I wasn't playful enough during that conversation. I think what kept me in the game was that I was really playful the time before, but I wanted to speak it out loud that I dont like to text forever and prefer meeting someone in person instead.

By the way the story continues, she texted me a couple of days ago and we kept on texting back and forth for a while again over the last days. I gave it an other try this time asking her on a date way more playful and we got something planned for Saturday.

Me: Made a pretty dirty joke
Her:
Pervert
Me:
hahahaha
speaking of being pervert
are you ready to face a pervert in real life?
Her:
Hahahaha oh god
When?

I guess you really have to differentiate, if a girl is only looking for a fuck on Tinder, this is def not the way to go. On the other side, if you imaging a hot girl is probably getting 30 matches a day from random guys, she can't meet up with all of them even if she wants to. So she has to preselect in some kinda way, and if its not only about a fuck, this obviously is texting about some stuff and see if you have something in common. I personally have had some Tinder dates after maybe 20 messages and I figured out during the first 10 minutes of the date that this is so not gonna work even for a ONS. In my opinion even for a ONS you have to have at least a little bit in common!

Looking for some more comments ;-)


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PostPosted: Thu Jul 10, 2014 7:39 pm 
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So.... did you meet her? Or is that Saturday?

You sorta cut it off at a shitty spot.

Do you have firm plans or is she going to flake out on you.

If you talk to her between now and then you need to keep up a playful persona. Nobody wants to get a drink with a lame duck.


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