Recovery from silence?



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 Post subject: Recovery from silence?
PostPosted: Thu Jul 03, 2014 10:07 pm 
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I'll keep it brief: met a girl on tinder, we share a lot of interests, great playful discussion. at a certain point i make a joke, she reads it quickly but does not understand it and ask me "what do you mean?", i check my phone later and in answer "sorry, what?" (seriously, i didn't know what she was missing).

she's already offline and she sees that only the day after. and, of course, she doesn't reply.

i wasn't needy at all, everything went smooth, but now i'm forced to either

1) wait (how long?)
or
2) double-text (how?)

i must say i feel the situation is ok for me to ask her out, even though i feel doing that now (i.e. after the silence) wouldn't be a great idea.

(as a more general note, i must admit that i write too much; not timing, but mostly amount of words. in every text conversation i have, i write more, sometimes considerably more, than the girl. is that ok?)

any tips?


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PostPosted: Fri Jul 04, 2014 12:52 pm 
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Well, you may as well follow up with this one - she's probably gone anyway. Nothing to lose. Just change the topic entirely... and stay away from witty jokes she has to think about (with this girl at least).

She's one of many on Tinder.

I used to be super wordy with texts too... I still am to a point - cause I write in real life also... and I'm just like that. What helps me is to review EVERYTHING I wrote after I typed it and before I send it... sounds tedious, but it's not as bad as you'd think... And after you figure out what you're doing wrong you can stop...

For example - a message like:

"Hey shithead - thinking about going out tonight but I'm not sure what I feel like doing. Do you have any suggestions?"

Could be edited down much shorter, but still convey the same idea - and look way better/less wordy and needy:

"Feel like going out tonight. What do you want to do?"


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 05, 2014 11:42 am 
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thanks mate. funny thing is, girl is offline on tinder since we stopped talking, and we're in an area where people on tinder are not too many, so i don't think i've been killed by competition... more like i've been killed by myself :shock:

i just don't know how to reopen, that's it.


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PostPosted: Sat Jul 26, 2014 6:51 am 
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I always try to get a phone number within the first 20 messages or so, claiming that my internet is capped or that Tinder doesn't work properly.

If conversation gets stale, asking for their opinion on things is a good start, or you could test the waters by mentioning something cool or interesting that you did today/ yesterday and waiting for their reply. You could also put the spark back in to the conversation with a flirty joke/ neg, or an open statement like 'It's over...'.

Try to use whatever fits your (assumed?) personality.


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