| Strong case of one-itus.
Apologies for the length, tried to make it short but not easy, - skip to bottom for short version.
The prelude: Went out with a super hot blonde with who had validation issues and needed constant attention which caused frustration and arguments from my part. She dumped me, got with a guy 2 weeks later. I moved cities, got on with my life but still craved her, 6months later get a random call from her asking to meet up which I caved to. Fast forward 6 months we are living together in the city I moved to and happier than ever or so I thought.
One weekend about a month ago I went back home for a funeral. I came back later that weekend found out she had been staying at other peoples houses all weekend and hanging out with some guy from work a lot.
I came back had an argument, next day she just got up and left without any attempt to talk or fix things.
Devistation ensued where she wouldn't speak to me, I couldn't get anything straight she ini sited that there was nothing with this guy and that she just didn't feel the same anymore and it our relationship had slipped back to how it was the first time.
It completely messed me up being left out of the blue like that again. If she wasn't so hot and we got on so well it would be a lot easier but I can't get this girl out of my head. We occasionally talked about various admin things such as rent for the next few weeks while she stayed with a friend. All cold no emotion at all. Over the next month or so I spent time, whilst heavily drinking, trying to get over it. I was getting there and not worrying as much.Then after about a week ago I get a message asking if we could meet up. I realise I should have said no, and pushed back initially but then caved and met her for lunch.
It was awkward at first and I was angry about certain things she had hidden from me. Then after a few more drinks she consistently hit on me, every kind of flirting under the sun, asking if we could go someplace and get it on. I resisted (so so hard) and pushed away at any kiss attempt or anything.
I found out after more drinks that this guy had been staying at hers the last week while he moved out of his house, and that they were going to share a room in a new flat as they both couldn't afford a room on their own. Again she insisted that it was just friendship but I flipped out and left her crying then went home.
Next day I ask what the hell was going on yesterday, she ignored anything about the secual chemistry and all of that, and just says we should be friends in a few months but isn't sure I'm there right now. Maybe, but she certantly isn't either and denies anything that happened/could have happened!
I have a sever one-itus on this girl, it plays with my mind 24/7, it's affecting my work, my health, sleep everything. She is my perfect type of looks in a girl and we get on fantastic when we weren't arguing. I know after the second time she has done this there can't be a way back even if I could get her to that stage. She's admitted she can't move on but she will quite quickly as has guys falling over her everywhere.
Did I make a mistake no sleeping with her the other night? How can I re-frame this so that she is seeking the attraction and I'm not the one being needy? I have a constant urge to get back on top/see her/speak to her and it's getting seriously unhealthy.
Any advice appreciated and sorry for the long post. It helps to vent!
Short version - 8.5 younger blonde broke up with me twice, have a severe case of one-itus, don't think i'll ever get hotter, am only getting average chicks right now. Met the other day 1m after breakup and I rejected sex from her - now she doesn't really want to know. I can't move on past her to he points it's getting unhealthy
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CHAT
