Now im very new to this and just started approaching so im not expecting much, but im wondering if my opener is part of the problem which ik the opener doesn't mean much but my opener is always: " I thought you were really cute so I had to come talk to you" Sometimes I try to add a neg saying how i don't like something like there shoes or hair. Maybe my problem is form there after i don't know really yet but im wondering how are those for openers. Is this my problem or is it most likely my mid game.

It's a numbers game.
How many did you approach in order for you to say that direct approach is not working with you?

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I don't use negs at all. Especially not when I go with a direct approach. When I do direct my goal is to get to know the girl as soon as possible, so actually I do exactly what I'm conveying with the opener. Then go on an instant date or if that's not possible, number close. My experience is that if I go for the number early, then there is a high prevalence of flakes. If we can get comfortable with each other on an instant date then more often than not, they don't flake.

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Im going to keep trying it Im just wondering if it has anything to do with what im saying

Why in the hell would you be direct and then straight up neg a chick? That's the most stupid thing you could do. Being direct is stating your interest in someone. When you do this you're telling them they're attractive or interesting and you're into that. When you follow that up with "Your hair is a bit of a mess. Is it windy outside?" it's like taking two steps back.

If you don't neg and it never works for you maybe you're just not that attractive, dude. Direct game requires you to actually be somewhat desirable. Indirect game is more like stealth game... You come in under the radar, allow them to open up to you and then show them how awesome and amazing you are to draw them in. Direct game is basically cutting through all that and forcing an answer in some shape or for as to whether she's into you or not regardless of the level and from there it's about building up more comfort and more attraction. If you're attractive chances are she's going to like you and be turned on by your boldness in being so direct. If you're not she's got nothing to work with which separates the "this guy is confident" vibe from the "this guy is a creep" vibe.

Another problem may be that you're not bad looking but you've got the wrong look, you're reaching outside of your social circle in terms of appearance. For instance you're a rocker, dress as a rocker and your taste in women is the church going Christian virgin wearing wool turtle necks and not revealing anything or whatever they wear. They wouldn't be caught dead seeing a rocker. It's all down to social psychology, they're influenced by their social background and those they interact with. If you want a specific type of woman you have to be presentable under their social rulings/circle. If you want a rocker chick you have to be atleast somewhat presentable to that social group. If you want a business woman you need to be presentable to her kind and so forth.

It's more than a numbers game, it has a lot to do with how you carry yourself as well.

If direct games SN made some good points, you should never ever neg following a direct opener. Think about it this way:

If a really hot girl walks up to you, like a 9 or a 10, and says: "Hi, I think you're really cute, my name is..." you're going to be very taken back and be nervous and confused, thinking "I can't screw this up. If she follows up with something like "if only your shoes matched your belt..." then you would probably be thinking "shit, I look like a dweeb, why did i dress like this, etc.

If the same really hot girl walks up to you, says your cute, and follows up with: "so, I'm interested in you. Tell me about yourself!" your reaction will be much, much different.

If direct game isn't working for you, it's because you simply aren't confident enough. Either you're shooting yourself in the foot with bad body language or poor subtle communication or at some point in the interactions your personality is no longer congruent with the ultra attractive man who opened her.

There's no trick to direct game, you have to open confident and stay that confident throughout the interaction.

First, good job seeking help. Most guys can't do it.


Ok lets get started. Your opener is lame. Some girls appreciate the directness because they have low self-esteem or they appreciate your confidence, but most girls are just wanting to get away from you as soon as possible. If you insist on being direct consider the story below:

A couple month ago I was in the club and I see a HB10 sitting against the wall while her HB9 friend is getting tons of attention from some club-bot. I walk up to her and say, "Black is a nice color on you (I lean in and touch her shoulder to point to the color while I say this). Are you here with your boyfriend?" she smiles the good natural kind of smile and points at her HB9 friend and says "i'm just here with my lesbian girlfriend (she was obviously not a lesbian). I reply "oh yeah, my boyfriend is around here somewhere." She smiles bigger and I know i'm in.

The key is if you are going to approach directly you have to remain consistent with the directness. HB10 appreciated my direct approach because she sensed my confidence and I followed through with a direct question about my intent, does she have a man. You can't say " I think you are really pretty so I had to talk to you, what do you do for work?" she is bored and this is creepy.

direct usually isn't the most appropriate approach. I keep it in my arsenal but I prefer indirect.

The second point I want to make is that I don't think you understand negs very well. You don't neg a girl by saying you don't like her hair. This is rude and antiseductive unless she is a COMPLETE bitch. A neg is more like saying " I really like that shirt, I was just talking to girl at the 16th St. Mall that had the same one." it is giving her attention and letting her know you don't think she is the shit at the same time.

Finally, you asked if you might have a problem with mid game. I would need some more depth on how you are handling mid game but it would have to be really solid to follow up your weak openers. My recommendation is that if you insist on a direct approach you read up on alpha males and work your mid game around making her pussy wet with your confidence and decisiveness. IT would also be wise to display high value before the approach with a direct open. Also consider adding a pattern about fate and taking a chance.

This guy is on point with this paragraph.

Direct openers are most effective when you there are signs that a girl is somewhat attracted to you. Like if you're in a bar and you see she's staring at you then go for it.

Otherwise I'd rather go indirect most of the time. Through my experience I found better results.

At the end of the day everyone has a style you need to find what works for you and stick with it.

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In my experience, and I've only been going direct for a couple weeks now so I'm still new to it, but there isn't a result you'd get with indirect that you wouldn't get faster with direct, whether that be rejection, taking her home, and everything in between. I think people get blown out of sets faster using direct whereas with indirect they'd get a flaky number, and they tend to confuse that for indirect giving them better results. I'd prefer rejection over a flaky number any time, but that's just my 2 cents.

Attracting women is based on 4 personality traits :

Domination:Knowing how to take the lead and demand respect.Let no one mess around with you.(talk with statements and assumptions and u will convey this)

Confidence:Believe in your self and love your self.Communicate strong and indepandent.(talk with statements and assumptions and u will convey this)

Humor:Playfull banter,teasing,negs,funny storys.(This one is harder to master,delivery is crucial)

Warmth:Protect the ones who have earned your trust.Show symphaty and be empathatic.(This one i found also very difficult aside humor)

So lets say you will only have 2 of these traits.Sorry dude.You will not be attractive enough.You will need at least 3 of these traits.We all know assumption/statements convey confidence and authority and authority comes from dominance right?So talking with assumption and statements you will convey confidence and dominance.But if you lack humor,never make her laugh,you might as well try your luck on night game or pick up tourist,lol.Confidence,humor and dominance will do the trick.At least you 3 of the 4 traits then is 75% attraction.Only 2 of the 4 traits is 50% attraction.Not enough for a lot of women.

Never heard of this but I have all four traits and I do get a lot of attraction and attention from women.

I think attraction is more complex than this, and also it varies among women what they like in guys. However, having these 4 personality traits I think really helps, since for most women, these are attractive qualities indeed. What I'd argue about is the "difficulty part". For example, the typical friend-zone guy will usually have the quality of Warmth and most probably even Humour, but he lacks Dominance and Confidence. What is difficult is very subjective for everyone.

Peace,

In$tinct

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It's all about your delivery

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