How to gain conversation skills?



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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2014 6:05 pm 
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Should I read books, watch talkshows or what?? Any idea?


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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2014 6:07 pm 
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Find books, classes, people whatever it may be that help you boost/build your self-confidence. In the end, you can talk about and say whatever the fuck you want. It is how it is delivered. It is not what you say, but how you say it 8)

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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2014 7:32 pm 
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Go out and talk to people. Practice. Practice. Practice.

Get a job where you are regularly talking to people.

Reading a book won't help you build a skill. Doing it will. Even if you suck... You'll get better.


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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2014 8:21 pm 
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Go out and talk to people. Practice. Practice. Practice.

Get a job where you are regularly talking to people.

Reading a book won't help you build a skill. Doing it will. Even if you suck... You'll get better.
I concur. If you wanna get better at running, you run. Better at playing pool? you play pool. There is no substitute for lots of experience. Work on your inner game, and talk about whatever is interesting to you. Try and relate to people with stories of your own. Just getting out there and doing it can be hard if you've got wicked approach anxiety, even if it is just a conversation, and not a close. The only way to fix it is to go out and do it several dozen times until you get used to it. Best of luck


-Ruggedized

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PostPosted: Thu May 01, 2014 10:28 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
Go out and talk to people. Practice. Practice. Practice.

Get a job where you are regularly talking to people.

Reading a book won't help you build a skill. Doing it will. Even if you suck... You'll get better.
I concur. If you wanna get better at running, you run. Better at playing pool? you play pool.


-Ruggedized
Not a good example, seeing as both involve improvement through practising movement patterns and the former involves other physiological changes


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PostPosted: Fri May 30, 2014 6:22 am 
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Quote:
Quote:
Quote:
Go out and talk to people. Practice. Practice. Practice.

Get a job where you are regularly talking to people.

Reading a book won't help you build a skill. Doing it will. Even if you suck... You'll get better.
I concur. If you wanna get better at running, you run. Better at playing pool? you play pool.


-Ruggedized
Not a good example, seeing as both involve improvement through practising movement patterns and the former involves other physiological changes
Actually, muscle memory and psychological reactions are the same in the brain, in terms of brain chemistry and neurons firing through a pre-established pattern. As an example, you may reply with a snappy comeback (complete with facial expressions and voice tone composure). Regardless, it was an analogy. The point I was making was that I agree with Majika in that the more you practice, the better you become. This applies to anything you do. Anyone that says otherwise has either been given everything, or they haven't achieved anything close to what they want.

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PostPosted: Sat May 31, 2014 4:30 am 
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Should I read books, watch talkshows or what?? Any idea?
Talk

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PostPosted: Sat May 31, 2014 5:11 am 
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I had massive amounts of trouble with this; but i overcame it.
some tips:
1. talk a little bit about your likes and dislikes and why
2. expand on what someone says
3. make assumptions and say why you think that
4. Tease (makes the people around you more friendlier)
5. Say whats exactly on your mind word for word
6. If nothing comes to mind you can talk about an event that happened earlier or an event that is about to take place.
7. Stop watching porn (kills conversational skills; speaking from personal experience)
8. Practice, become more confident, leave your comfort zone.

No need to read books or watch talk shows. Don't use suave lines nor should you worry about witty comebacks. Keep it simple.


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 01, 2014 3:11 pm 
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I'm struggling with this too. Obviously what's already been posted is bang on. The question for me now is who the fuck do you talk to?

A couple of years back I worked as a street fundraiser, which was great for this because your job is literally to talk to total strangers all day. Any sales type job, or even customer service would be just as good. Obviously most people can't just change their career for this purpose but it has occurred to me that you can go to the people who have those jobs. They have to talk to you! And if it all goes tits up you can bail and just try again!

head down to your nearest clothes shop and try and find a friendly assistant. Tell them you're looking for something specific and you need some help. Then do the same in the next shop. And the next. I bet you'll notice that as you "warm up" you'll find it easier and easier with each shop you go to. You can do the same thing on the telephone. Lots of companies have lines dedicated to comments & feedback. You'll have to pick some products and decide what you want to say about them but that's probably not going to hurt either, right? Maybe try and come up with something creative that'll make the agent laugh. Anyone doing a job like that is probably going to welcome a bit of a change of pace. Good luck


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PostPosted: Sun Jun 01, 2014 4:51 pm 
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The key is to practice, go out and talk to people
There are no other ways to get better .. Just practice

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