Hello , My name is Jeffrey and I got a question. By the way my English is quite bad. I hope somebody can help me out here , because my friends aren't serious about this subject.

I had a strange situation with a girl I felt in love with. This person tells me that she loves me , but she hide it from her friends , familiy and etc. I don't really like that , also her friends heard rumours about me that I am a bad guy ; ( That is so not true , because of these rumors our relationship is not going that well anymore.

I really want to be with her and hang out together , also we live quite far from each other that does not make the situation easier. Normally she talks so much that you could shutdown your phone and after these rumours it is not like before.... It seems like that she don't spend that much time in me unfortunately. There is something I want to add , that I can become jealous. These are feature of love... i think so . I can see through her fb , whatssapp and other social media that are other boys trying to flirt with her and she does reply to them, She also went out with them... Don't like that and is this a trust problem that comes from me? I don't know what to do anymore ... hopefully somebody can help me out and give me advice for in the further.

Bad rumours? About what?

Surely you have to think to yourself, "is this really what I want in a girl?" Wouldn't it be better to find a girl who wants to be with you?

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Razorface

SPAM: Razor-face

These rumours about that I used girls for sex , My ex probably told many people that ..... I never did anything that bad.... I am thankfull for your reply mate.. I broke up 10 minutes ago and she said that she don't know that she really love me anymore... Well It don't bother me to share my story . Do you have any other tips/ advice for a good healthy relationship? I don't want to make the same mistakes

Not to be negative, but it is all the same, I collected enough of relationship experience until now, and I see that the recent longer one shapes in the same way as any other. Simple - in moments when you have more power, she will self-delude that she loves you, then you can be calm for a while. The more you loose it, and the less you guide her through this entertaining illusion and stop pushing all the right and intense buttons (sexual chemicals, enough status, creativity, making her chase you and afraid to loose you), the closer you are to dullness. If relationship wasn't typically built well, no game AT ALL, game over. Otherwise, from this point its very easy to slip further(easier than to revert back), and she won't just throw you away, but there will be real problems.

The way it will be played out also depends on your cultural environment, age group, social circles, habits, and plenty more. If you thought that health of any relationship is solely about two "compatible" individuals, and can go against the grain of environmental circumstances, you missed some things.

I could almost draw a diagram

I had the same problem,once her family and friends turn on you two things can happen...
She can choose to take actions to defend you and get you back in there or she'll do nothing and its most likely a scenario where your setting yourself up for lots of pain...
It will be tough but try and think about moving on bro.

Why did they hate you?

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Razorface

SPAM: Razor-face

Thanks everybody , you all gaved me great advice