Hi everyone,

There is this HB9 I initially attracted and we hooked up twice (very quickly). I was so into her I asked her I wanted to be in a relationship (on our 3rd date) and she said yes. We saw each other a few more times.

Then suddenly after seeing each other for less than a week she said she realized she doesn't want to be in a relationship and its not me but her. And that I'm a great guy and she really likes me and wants to be in close friends.

I tried meeting up with her after that and she flaked on me. She also been acting distance and never gets in touch with me.

Our last conversation was over text and it didn't go well. She was quite aloof, distant and wasn't invested in the conversation. Let us just say she is acting very uninterested even in the friendship.

My question is, is it possible to RE-ATTRACT a girl? Can I re-attract this girl?

The most obvious thing to do is forget about her for a while, completely cut contact and meet other girls. But I'm wondering after a week or two can I hit her up again and regain her interest? What would be the way to do it?

I'm sure there are situations where a guy act desperate and pushy with a girl (like I did) and loses the attraction and interest they once had and then down the road are able to gain it back somehow?

Thanks.

Start ignoring her. When she realizes you aren't reaching out to her anymore, she'll send a feeler out. The key now is not to revert to your old behavior. Act cool, more reserved and less eager. She has initiated and now you are taking control by letting her know you're the one doing the screening. She is trying to talk to you, not vice-versa. Be happy and cool and demonstrate that you have a social life outside of her (don't try too hard to do this). Let her come to you. Don't always be the last one to text back, take your time responding (i.e don't make it seem to urgent or important to you). She MAY begin showing romantic or sexual interest again. You'll at least pique her interest.

I think you might've asked her to be your gf too soon. Probably scared her off, maybe a friend said something like "Wow, didn't you only go on like three dates with that guy? That's so weird!". Just play it cool next time, keep hooking up with her and let her bring up the status talk. Men convey messages by actions (i.e., if you want her to be your gf, start acting towards her like it, if you just want a fuck buddy, start acting toward her like it.) Women convey messages through words. Let her wonder what you are, you just act like what you want her and yourself to be next time.

Count 3 weeks when you successfully sarged her and then sarge her again. ONLY this time, escalate aggressively towards the f-close. Let us know if it works fer yah.

Go NC until the next 3 week cycle.

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It most certainly is possible. BUT you must play it cool. Game other chicks
Attention is currency to her. Ignore her completely for 2/3 weeks then go in hard

What about 2 weeks? What if she's acting bitchy because she's on her menses. after one week, waiting 3 weeks you'll hit that time again.

Thanks guy all very helpful!

So basically what I understood is wait 2/3 weeks since we had lost contact and in that period NC from my end!

I just want you to keep in mind that our last text conversation was on Friday night (and I haven't heard from her since) where she acted very disinterested in hearing from me, didn't invest in the conversation, said I was being pushy (because I asked her why didn't she invite me to her friend's party) and said she doesn't want to be in a relationship and only friends.

I asked her if she can keep an open mind about having a relationship in the future and she wrote she doesn't think is possible (even though last week she said it might be possible). I know I was pushy pushing on a relationship. Had I left things casual and non-committal I am sure I would still be seeing her.

I the last line I wrote was have a fun night with your friends and she didn't reply. I haven't heard from her since (3 days passed) and I also didn't try contacting her.

It is clear that the ATTRACTION we once had and the INTEREST she had in me is completely gone.

So you think if I don't contact her for 2/3 weeks she might become interested in?

How should I re-initiate contact in 2/3 weeks?

One of the issues we had is I always insisted on having a relationship (and she did initially agree at first but changed her mind after a few days). She said she doesn't want a relationship and wants to be friends but that she really likes me and doesn't want to lose me. However, her actions (flaking on me, not investing in our text conversations and not contacting me) doesn't support that at all.

But I do know when we were together the chemistry was insane and she was all over me. And she said she said yes to me initially because she was very excited (it seems her friends talked her out of it).

Hey dude,

There is always a way to re-attract a woman but first you must stop doing what you're doing and realize why it isn't working.

If you came before a door with a pull sign on it, would you begin pushing it if you really wanted to get through the door badly? It would be foolish, wouldn't it?

So what you're currently doing is pushing on a door with a pull sign on it. She's the door. So if you want any hope to reattract the girl start pulling and then you can walk through the door.

A woman likes to know that a man can stand on his own two feet an do without her. If you are constantly reaching out to her subconsciously she will feel like you are incapable of being a provider since you need her every step of the way.

Start pulling man.. The tables always turn; but not until you start doing the opposite of what currently isn't working.

Let a week go by and you'll hear from her.

How old are you btw?

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Thanks for the upbeat post! That was very useful!

I'm 33. I always seem to find myself falling into the same trap, pushing.....

Really like your analogy of the door!

So do you think even though I came across as needy, desperate and pushy there is a chance I might attract her again by pulling?

I just hope my pushing didn't push it too far to the point the door is now locked!

Like I stated. There is always a chance. But a chance is a chance only if you begin to take up behaviors outside of what you're currently doing.


There is absolutely no chance in the world that if you keep pushing you'll get her back. But by pulling, you increase your chances.

I sent you some helpful information in your PM's.

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Any time a girl loses interest, you did something majorly wrong. Before you try to get her back, you have to stop and re-evaluate. Get lots of practice on other girls in meantime (also helps with one-itis). Get better clothes, hair style, better hobbies. Have self-control to withhold contact, speak slowly (slow is interesting), don't look at her immediately when she speaks, and everything else that you and I know but we don't always do because we like her. Don't give her any benefit of the doubt and follow the methods. Step by step. Don't skip. Don't let your emotions cloud your technique.

Also, up your dominance in your life to the next level. live it, be it; you're always on stage. google pua dominance and start reading. In my experience, this is one thing that typically suffers when you fall in love and want to be nice. Don't.

No. That's too long if that's the point of reckoning. When was the time she said 'yes' and was very receptive to you? That should be the cycle you should be looking at. You start counting when she said 'yes'; not the time when she bitched about something you did or the time you lost contact.

As others have pointed out, you did something that turned her off a lot. That's her logical side saying 'no'. But what turned her on to you in the first place and said 'yes' could be primal. I said 'could'. It's not set in stone but it will probably work again if it's primal.

So you tap on her primal instinct and sarge her again 3 weeks after she said 'yes'. The cycle is something like this 3 weeks, 6 weeks, 9 weeks, 12 weeks...

A girl who is sexually attracted to you will remain that way for quite some time; even when her mind says 'no', her heart (and pussy) will always say 'yes'.

_________________
Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

general-questions/topic137931.html

Dude thanks a lot for your post! That is very interesting and I different perspective on what I thought and been reading.

The time she said 'yes' and was very receptive to me was on Friday, Feb. 28th so that is 2 1/2 weeks ago. However, just as fast as she said 'yes' to me and we hooked up within a week she became unreceptive and now she is very unreceptive. That is probably as a result of my desperate, needy and pushy behavior it probably turned her off.

But yes I almost certain she was 'primal' when she said yes and was very sexually attracted to me because she is the one who made the move on me and was all over me. She was grabbing me like an animal and couldn't get her hands of me. She also was very obedient at the time.

The issue is this Friday will be 3 weeks since I sarged her successfully but based on what Eddie said the issue is I am been pushing when I should have been pulling. If I push on Friday, I am wondering if it is too soon? Our last contact was on Friday and by Friday it will only be a week with NC (she is the one that seems to cut contact off...I am in the weak position). I am worried I will be pushing again and appear desperate. Do I need more NC time? I am also wondering if in a week or 2 she will get in touch (seems unlikely at this stage though).

But was it primal and sexual absolutely. Can that be lost? It seems so. Her logic took over.

If I am to contact her on Friday, how would I do it?

Thanks for your help.

OP, you'll need to show yourself up physically when your window of opportunity comes. No fucking text messages or calls. In your case, it will take time to learn not to be needy. But when this Friday comes and she's horny, you gotta do something.

Dress good. Smell good. When she's all over you again, go for the f-close. No excuses. Bang her good. If she remains bitchy, eject and move on. No amount of sarging can change her mind from that point forward.

Eddie's advice is good too. Hell, it's typical PUA advice and it works a lot. But when a girl is at her horniest during her cycle, you gotta fuck her. After that, if you don't fuck her, you're back to zero.

_________________
Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

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Sounds good but I don't know how do I show up physically when my window of opportunity comes? I only seen her three times in my life, I don't know where she goes out on Friday and we have no common friends.

I don't know where she lives and if I did and I showed up wouldn't I appear like a stalker?

The only way for me to see her is text/call.....what should I do in that case?

Damn. You'll have to go with Eddie's advice then. Next time when you sarge, learn the girl's logistics so Day 2s and Day 3s and so on and so forth are a lot more easier.

_________________
Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

general-questions/topic137931.html