Hey guys, been going out with a girl for over a month now (officially), we get on really well, shes a lovely girl etc... we have sex quite a bit... however... as you probably guessed from the title, there is a massive lack of blow jobs..

She never goes down on me by her own accord, when I do get her to go down on me its after iv got her horny and she will suck for about 20 seconds then want sex, iv cum in her mouth a few times after sex by jerking into it, but I just cant seem to get her to be more willing and suck my dick.

Any ideas? It may sound kinda shallow, but I want turning on aswell, whereas shes happy with just penis in vagina + same positions.,

You should probably talk to HER about it. Just say, "I want a blowjob."

Be sure to wash your cock beforehand for higher continued success.

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The ultimate lesson of psychoanalysis is that human life is never "just life": we are possessed by the strange drive to enjoy life in excess, attached to a surplus which derails the ordinary run of things.
-Slavoj Zizek

Aaah damn, the girls that want the same positions every time... not good. But that is quite common. And I am not able to understand that because isn't it woman that get bored of repetitive stuff in the first place? All relationship articles and books state that. But there are still some girls that like it one way, and probably get bored of sex in general because it is the same all the time, even though that is her fault. Of course, experienced puas like jablowme, hellhound and someting_foxe will say that it is your fault as you have to be a master and she has to do whatever you tell her to - that does make sense as well.

Regarding BJ's itself - i have been in this situation where i didn't like bjs at all - couldn't even cum. We had a great sexual life though. After everything went down i started liking bj's as our sex was not good anymore. Now when it is an only thing i can get from her is a bj - i really enjoy that, but i do still have to ask for it.

Now regarding your problem is not easy to give some specific advice - just typical things: tell her, ask, keep your frame, don't beg, keep yourself clean before you start and eat a pineapple at least 3 hours before you do that. That is not a myth and it works.

By the way how old/experienced is she?

Good luck.

With regard to blowjobs, someone once told me, "If it's a prerequisite, it's a prerequisite." Basically, if having your dick sucked is a need, she's going to have to meet it.

Tell her you're a guy who likes blowjobs frequently. If she isn't the kind of girl who likes giving them often, ask yourself if that's good enough for you.

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"Let me ask you something. If the rule you followed brought you to this, of what use was the rule?"

Use similar tactics to LMR.

The Sticks:

Freeze-out (but don't act like a jerk about it, just seem to genuinely lose interest in her and in sex with her), wistfully remember aloud and compliment the BJ techniques of past girlfriends (but not right after getting denied or when it's too obvious why you are doing it, etc.)

The Carrots (pun intended):

During making out, tell her to suck your tongue and fingers, feed her strawberries, etc. basically set up an erotic oral-focused scenario. Having good chest/abs help b/c she'll enjoy kissing and licking her way down it. Almost any girl will love to suck dick if you set it up right. Ultimately 95% of girls are followers.

Ultimately you must never seem to wrapped up about it (always maintain frame and self control like everything in PUA) and yet at the same time she must get the hint that this is a deal breaker. It's a subtle balance. Try to be willing to walk away (as with everything else in PUA, having other girls available massively helps your frame, and it may help if she knows you have those options). If you have any exes that gave good BJs that are still in your life, hang out with them, be honest to this girl about it, and do some of the aforementioned BJ reminiscing to her.


I'm like you, BJs are a must, so I deal with a lot of BJ closing (I prefer a BJ close to a vaginal close, actually, b/c it's safer, more dominant, and establishes primacy of my pleasure - almost any nonvirgin who will blow you will fuck you soon enough anyway). Good luck.