I am now convinced she did cheat, which means break up. Would you recommend I shout at her, make her feel bad, tell her she has no respect, no values etc.? I will do that if that's right then break up with her, delete her and move on.
So continue to freeze her out or have a talk and get angry? Or do as heywood did, and say, "I'm not happy. Lets break up." End off. No anger, no conversation, no putting her in her place. Surely if she hasn't learnt respect by now she won't learn it? I'm not doing this for her sake, I always believed showing negative emotion and volatility was a sign of weakness, and showing that she is capable of making you angry.

I want to do this right. Everything has a learn. I want to know how an alpha male breaks up with a girl, so I will know how to do it again. Nothing is unimportant. Obviously meet and to her face etc.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

There has been some solid advice in this thread, but before you break up you should definitely sit down and talk with her...two years is a long time to just break up via text and then go no contact. When you get together to talk you shouldn't be angry or yell or scream. Be honest with her and tell her the problems as you see them and be ready to walk away after that (it sounds like you are). If you do indeed break up, don't contact or facebook stalk etc. Just cut off completely.

If she's a good GF, she wouldn't even consider something like that, and she definitely wouldn't say that if she does something though, she'd take responsibility. I am currently in a dilemma with my GF, but if it were this bad, I wouldn't hesitate to leave. Your a champ for sticking this long.

I'm going to take this advice.

The frame; I'm having a great day and have had a great few days break from her, which is what I needed because I feel like throwing up every-time I think about this girl now, it is just anxiety. This relationship is vexing me, I am unhappy, I explain this to her and I want to break up.

Do I instigate the meeting or wait for her to instigate it?
Is this good advice?

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

con i really want to talk to you
I have family obligations tonight. We will talk tomorrow.

bn

okey

you know what

i won t bother myself begining you to talk

you can do what ever you want

i won t oblige you to stay with you

i m fucking upset of your behavior

fuck this shit

goodnight

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

Some one please tell me, react now or react later. Proposed response;

How dare you talk to me like that! I have never once cursed at you! I am on a night with my family! Respect that!

Please someone tell me quickly whether or not to react.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

What the fuck, dude? I... I just don't know what's going on here.

Okay, let's make this clear. Making her feel bad does not equal you getting your ego up and cursing at her. You are clearly not ready for a serious relationship at all. You lack basic communication skills, you lack emotional intelligence, you lack inner game, you lack everything. Leave it. Doesn't matter at all how you end this relationship. It's going to be nasty anyway. Go no contact, or sit down and talk with her. It doesn't matter. You can't communicate with your girl so if you talk to her it's going to be bad, and if you go no contact it's going to be bad. Doesn't matter at this point. What matters is that before you get into a relationship you learn how to set boundaries, have frame control, and a mindset that's not all about your ego. And before you ask "HOW?" I answer you: Go out, and learn. No shortcut here. It's basically LIFE experience. It's nothing to be ashamed of lacking when you're only 22. I'm not bashing you. I'm telling you the facts. Good luck, have fun!

Peace,

In$tinct

_________________
"Bros before hoes"

Relationship guide: extended-relationship-guide-vt170687.html

http://wayoftheplayer.com/become-a-player/instinct

I don't know who said what, but just go meet up with her already. The advice above your post is exactly what you should be doing.

All I would do is ignore her messages tonight, let her have a really shit sleep over it, call her and arrange to meet up. Then don't talk to her again until you meet.

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REBORN

The bold is her, I was deliberately being cold, (bare in mind also that English is not my gf's first language) I responded;

"I was with my family tonight. You were mentioned. If you would oblige me, I would like to talk tomorrow." I completely ignored that she cursed, and have continued to push my frame, calmly.

Is that weak? Am I letting her away from disrespecting me by ignoring it?

All I had to do here was let her have a rough night and she would probably eventually have apologised, now my response has made her feel vindicated.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

Ok, well my point stands.

Any also your girlfriend is immature as fuck, too many reg flags to even consider staying with her, if I was in your situation.

_________________
REBORN

It is all experience for me. I need these. All fun, all part of the game.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

The actual facts in this thread are pretty small.
The OP's beta proposed responses, mental masturbation about IQ and cheaters and bi polar text messages has clouded alot of things here. Also, there is no REAL information about this girl or their relationship to recommend anything.

The facts:
OP's gf told him a guy wanted to hang out because he was bored.
If the guy came to hang out he would have to sleep in her bed because the couch was bad.
The guy went to a party instead so didn't come hang out with her, OP SPAM her so confirmed it didn't happen.
Therefore she DIDN'T cheat that night.

The title is "Gf invited male friend around to sleep in her bed."
This is not true. It's more accurate to say "Gf friend wanted to hang with my gf and would have to sleep over in her bed."


I don't understand the jump to she DID cheat, she HAS cheated, she WILL cheat, break up with her.

Tbh if a friend approached me with this, there is alot more information I'd need before determining whether she wanted to cheat here.

Is she the type of girl who would joke with you about this stuff for a reaction?
Is she the type of girl who hangs out with guy friends at her place or theirs?
Is she the type of girl who lets friends crash at her place?
How has she been talking to this guy? Is he an old friend?
Has she shown any other signs of straying?

Optimistic signs that she wasn't thinking about or has cheated:
The guy didn't come over because he went to a party. So it sounds like he really was bored and looking for something to do. If his motive was to fuck her, I'd think he would have gone over that night since she said he could. So it seems like he was just bored. I have some female friends who I call over and they crash afterwards at my place. Usually in my bed because my couch sucks too. Some people just like chilling some nights and you have to sleep somewhere afterwards instead of driving home late.

She told you he was coming over. Now she could have been looking for denialbility after the fact, but at least you know she hasn't been cheating BEFORE. If she had cheated before she wouldn't be telling you now when someone is coming over. Especially since you're far from her so a currently cheating person would have no reason to. Maybe this would have been the first time she did, but it's not plausible that she HAS been cheating.

Anyways, just talk to her. I can tell you're an overthinker. Don't try to act alpha and secretly come for advice on what to do to "hold your frame." You are trying to play games with a girl when you don't even know if she wanted to cheat or was innocent. You're 2 years into your relationship. By now she knows who you are. Either she likes it or she doesn't. She is not going to start going crazy for you because of someone else's bad ass text messages that you got online.

If you're 100% sure she cheated dump her.
If you're not talk to her and find out.

some interesting input from neo you should consider

i just thought about something.. your first post and the first sentence on the thread: How does he know the couch in uncomfortable?

and yes no matter what is going on with your gf, you are over thinking.

this thread even though it is not that bad but it somewhat reminds me of this one: hb9-5-with-a-boyfriend-caught-us-in-bed ... 65854.html

I want to fuck this one ultimately perfect girl.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Bam.

Hunter_Foxe's Schadenfreude. Think about it. The girl seems to enjoy stewing the OP a lot in it. She gets good sex on one side and gets her emotional high on another side who couldn't provide good sex due to some health condition.

_________________
Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

general-questions/topic137931.html