So much respect for that. Really made me smile. You came across as such a romantic dude with the father daughter comparison, I was going to ask where the sex came in. Is there no element of that, which feels fucked up in a negative way??

You seem like a good guy, but you are living your reality. You are doing those attraction starved cougars a service.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

The Father / Daughter thing is actually a more common sexual fantasy than you think. The more fucked-up something is, generally the more horny it is for both me and the woman. Search "I fantasize about my dad" on Google if you don't believe me. The type of girls I go for are submissive. Dominant feminist women repulse me so of course you cannot have this type of "slave" sex with every woman. I don't care if the girls enjoy it or not. All I know is they come back for more, and they are usually literally dripping wet on my carpet when they've been wearing the collar before I've even taken their panties off.

The reason why I focused on the Father / Daughter thing however, was more for platonic reasons than sexual. I was just trying to illustrate the correct way to treat your woman is like a daughter, not like your mother. The daughter seeks approval from her father, she doesn't TELL him what to do, she ASKS him permission. Can you see the difference between this and the way your girlfriend treats you?

Yes absolutely, although I make call me master quite frequently and tell her she's my slave. She also asks me if I will ever rape her if she doesn't want sex.

So are submissive women less likely to be loyal would you say? I want to ask her the meaning of a post on Facebook, that may imply she is being unfaithful, but no matter how I do this, I am sounding jealous.

Hunter, how can your scenarios ever translate to monogamy? Someone posted about a seven year itch. That post implies that a man and a women's bond is emotional not sexual in long term monogamy, surely there are ways of maintaining and cultivating this emotional relationship.

I'm not that well endowed. Don't have a massive impact on my confidence. I still dominate, just not as deep. Is my endowment a major factor? I was always of the opinion that most guys don't know how to use their dick so it doesn't really matter.

My gut is telling me she didn't cheat. If I find out she did cheat, my cake is removing his icing. I am fully prepared to be proven wrong. I've been cheated on before, one time significantly, at the end of a 10 month relationship, however, that relationship was going a lot worse than this one (in my opinion).

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

Would there be any benefit in telling her "I am very disappointed in you"?
That is somewhat maternal.

I really think she just did something stupid, I don't think she cheated.

Look at it this way, if she did cheat, and I find out later that this was the case, I will break up, no question. Therefore, from this point, I assume that she has been faithful, because if I don't, there is nothing to say, I break up with her.

So therefore, "You have been very bold. I am going to tie you up and beat you." Is there any disadvantage with this? I run the risk of her treating me like a clown, I think.

"You have been very silly. We should talk about it miss x."

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

My reaction after the freeze out ends,

"I was taking a holiday."

or

"I was pissed off because you were going to sleep with a guy"

or

"Work's going well, that girl from marketing keeps flirting with me though, it's very irritating." (this seems immature and validation seeking, and obviously I have been ignoring her, so should I not tell her what she has done wrong."

OR

"Do you know why I am ignoring you?"

OR

Is there any harm in saying the truth?

"I believe you, I just took some time to think."

OR

"I believe you, I just took some time to think. That was a ridiculously silly thing you did."

I am not asking you guys to help me through each text, just through this conflict, because this is the first time there has been any real conflict in two years.

However, if she was just sharing her bed with a guy, this girl is Tunisian btw, but I have a place in Tunis, despite not speaking French. It is a different culture there (I am not that loaded, I swear, Tunis is cheap!). It is still not OK.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

Good, but your sexual relationship is not the same as your platonic relationship. It doesn't matter how hard you dominate her in the bedroom if you let her dominate you in the relationship.
Every woman is different. The key to happiness in a monogamous relationship is actually to stop caring about fidelity, strange as that may sound. The less you care about the possibility of her cheating, the less likely she is to cheat. Women cheat when they feel trapped and lack freedom. If you smother a woman with a blanket of too much attention, affection and seek constant reassurance, she will look for a challenging man elsewhere.

Let's just pretend she didn't sleep with that dude and she'd never cheated on you. If you were to wrongly accuse her of cheating, she would be rightly upset at the injustice of it and think "well I might as well cheat on him if he thinks I'm a cheater anyway".
You can, but why do you want to stay with this girl for the rest of your life? 7 years is an eternity. Does it not depress you to think that in 7 years' time you will still be getting lied to and cuckolded by the same biatch? You're 22. You will only be this young once. Your youth will be gone before you know it and you will regret not being open to new experiences with other people, travelling more and living YOUR life, not a life of servitude to your girlfriend's needs and desires. Your needs should always come first. Remember Gwen Stefani singing "I'm just a girl". Not a goddess, not a princess. She's just a girl. Treat her like one.
Doesn't affect your confidence, but you felt the need to bring it up? Umm... ok? I'm amazed at how often this comes up. Embrace your small cock. Or your small height. Or your small feet. Any insecurity you have about yourself, turn it into a strength. Your insecurity will be the death of you if you worry about the length of your cock. Girth is more important than length. Technique is more important than girth. Unless you have a micropenis, in which case you need to get really REALLY good at fingering and cunlingus. Mine is 4"inches soft and 6"inches hard. Pretty small compared to porn studs, but I've never had any complaints. Most guys are between 4.5" and 7" erect. But why am I reassuring you? IT DOESN'T MATTER.
Stop caring about her cheating. Cheat on her if the thoughts are fucking you up that badly. It will feel awesome and it will help you stop caring so much. Chill out. You're too intense. Your intensity is driving her away.

Your intensity is driving ME away. Calm down! Post one message at a time, geez! If you don't get a reply, just wait longer. Nothing is urgent.

You're the boss. You need to be in control of your own shit. The only reason why anything would be urgent is a life or death situation, like a car accident. Anything else can wait until YOURE ready to deal with it. Stop REACTING.

I need to get out of this pattern of reacting. I'll give you the truth. I was reasonably well endowed. I suffered a penile injury (rare but it happens) in January 2012. At that moment my world turned upside down and I had been awesome (still with my current gf at that stage). Short story; I'm finding my libido difficult to to find, I feel completely unattractive and I have this lingering fear of being alone and being unable to attract women, being humiliated when I do. I'm optimistic though, I've just accepted that this is the way I am, I have continued to fuck my girl, she's continued to cum, it's not quite the same, but fuck it, nothing lasts in life. I'm still lucky, I'm just a little intense. I've developed (or redeveloped) sporadic social anxiety. I'm optimistic; I will learn how to deal with all this, and eventually find meaning in my life again. This is my reality, I accept that I am not a lotto winner.

Are those women you fuck not already unhappy/fucked up? It does sound like that man. People have morals as well as instincts, some people's intellect can over come their instincts, I can't imagine there's being a happy experience. What I mean is there is more than physical attraction, there is that emotional bond.

As I said, my insecurity is my caring and fear that she is cheating, I totally agree there. The problem is I can't find enough value for myself, enough love. I find it difficult to align myself with successful individuals as I would have done before, admiring people like Gene Simmons, Nelson Mandela, Bowie, even Steve Jobs, and trying to learn from them because I felt a similarity.

She text me saying,

"What s wrong?? I m lost ?? What happened?? Why you re acting like that?"

I'm thinking of replying, "Relax XXX. I'm taking some time to think and make sure I am who I want to be [this is based on me telling her my ideals, ambitions etc]. Concentrate your attentions on your exams."

I want to turn a corner here, I'm really not sure how to get out of this freeze out.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

The words "moral" and "intellect" are not interchangeable. Do not confuse them, as they couldn't be more different in meaning! Women make their decisions based on emotions, not intellect or logic. You fundamentally misunderstand the female psyche.

I have an emotional bond with every woman I fuck. I love them all. Of course the girls who cheat with me are unsatisfied with aspects of their partners. But I sleep with females players and single girls too. And I still have a "bottom bitch", i.e. my main bitch who gets to spend weekends with me.

Yeah I understand that. Loving them is a reflection of the love of life and the self. Bottom bitch is like your girlfriend. Still wondering what to say to mine. Need to say something at some point. Nothing really springs to mind.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

To a very liberal guy such as myself, who was the biggest nice guy, needy chode ever, the advice of people like Hunter, Heywood etc can feel jarring and it threatens your belief in the purity of women and rocks the pedestal they were placed on.

But trust me, in the years I've been on here, I have ignored advice from the aforementioned forum posters and it has always gone wrong! Listen to what they say, even if it currently sounds unpalatable to you.

LOL. I have to try some of these yet.

_________________
Approach. Open. Escalate. Isolate

Here are my two essential rules on texting that will save you tons of time and money:

general-questions/topic137931.html

Is it wise telling her,

"I'm taking some time to reflect!!"

Surely any attraction she gets of my rejection and silence is temporary and if she is also (like me) looking for stability she will seek it else where?

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be

Jeez, what's the point of all this??

If she was hoping to cheat, putting your "foot down" is just going to make it easier for her to justify it next time. If she doesn't care enough abt you NOT to cheat, this is not going to change that and will most likely be where she takes the opportunity to.

If you think she was hoping for something, dump her. If you think she was just naive and dumb, talk to her.

How long have you been with this girl?

Two years.

She texted me, "We really need to talk tomorrow"

This is a few hours after I sent her a message saying that what she did was silly, everything is temporary, if this was to end i would devote all my energy into a new chapter, took some time to regain my focus. She has sent me two long texts at this point.

I am irratated that she is setting the frame. Should I ignore her call?

Tomorrow I wait for her to contact me. When she says to talk, I don't immeadiately respond, I wait about half an hour. I smile and am aloof when she talks, I tell her that I found her behaviour silly and took some time to myself, i went out with friends etc. No big deal, I am the adult, she is the child, I am a little irrated by her so she was punished.

There is also the possibility she will admit to cheating. If she does this I say goodbye, end the conversation and move on.

Let me know what you think.

_________________
Age; 26
Use your knowledge and actions to be the best version of yourself you can be