As many here know, I'm in a poly relationship. I recently got a new boyfriend, and stopped being into my ex, who is somewhat psychotic. We'll call my ex E. My other ex, who I was engaged to (we'll call him G), cannot stand to see me with other lovers and does whatever he can to sabotage it. G and E both do, actually.

My new bf wants to go to a party in a nearby city, and both G and E are involved in throwing the party. Due to certain factors, I cannot avoid partying in this city and because of that, I am never fully away from E's powerful influence. My new bf has been bringing up the idea more and more.

This is a huge problem, and I don't know what to tell him.

This Valentines Day, E threw a party that originally was 18+. I announced I'd attend with my new beau, thinking that E was over me. He switched the age minimum to 21+, purged all the flyers from forums featuring the party, and then replaced the flyer with a new one that has a woman who looks eerily similar to me holding a bloody heart in one hand, and a pair of the old flyers in her other hand. (Subtle, I know.) The same day I found that out, G tried to contact me, and I later saw a post where he subtly asked me if I wanted to go to the city.

I'm going to make a point of it and say that both G and E are somewhat obsessive, and that they have gone through extreme lengths to keep tabs on me. My girlfriend and I were followed home and almost run off the road by people who I believe may be associated with G. E has been known to be very vicious, manipulative, and sneaky. These are clearly not men to be trifled with, but due to certain issues, I cannot go to the cops.

How do I circumvent this issue? I don't want to lose my boyfriend because of these two jackasses.

Howdy, from the sounds of it you have a pretty simple decision. Just tell him about these two, and your want / need to avoid these two... uh gentlemen. He should understand, I know I would.

I barely consider either of the salt and pepper shakers men anymore. Real men would have pursued me in a way that doesn't fuck with my mind, or you know, threaten my physical or emotional wellbeing. I'm gonna try to talk to him again.

Agreed, the fact they pursued you in this fashion shows you should have some concern about it, and that he should understand at the very least that you don't want to come face to face with em', I'm sure he'll understand