Okay. So I'm new in town and don't really know anyone so decided to check out the scene on tinder. I've always had a good record with girls and have what the vast majority would call an attractive lifestyle. I matched a VERY hot girl and went for drinks with her which went really well, went back to hers for a 'movie' afterwards but once sat down she didn't want to kiss, she wanted to "take it slow", mentioning a recent breakup. Usually escalation isn't a problem for me but this girl was real stubborn.

Anyway it still went well enough to go for coffee with her two days after but now it feels like I'm running out of stuff to bring in and she's getting bored. I reckon I've got a half chance of getting dinner with her this week which needless to say is last chance saloon, so I really need to NAIL it at dinner. Do you have any advice on bringing some 'danger' into my personality and how to be a bit more interesting? So far we've clicked well but its been a bit too 'nice'. I think part of the reason for this was the first date was when I still had a girlfriend at home (I broke up with her the next morning) so I was slightly tentative. I've not been too keen, I've left it 3 days to ask about dinner etc. and have played it cool, its just about getting that spark. You'll know what I mean. Any help massively appreciated! Basically hoping for some instruction that will make me kick some serious ass on the 3rd date so I can nail this girl

Ok please don't take this as a personal attack, as I am about to start this off by flaming you.


YOU SOUND LIKE A COMPLETE BITCH

You are basically asking...after two boring non-event interview dates how you can be more "dangerous" and make a girl like you? Is that really the goal here? To make someone like you so she will finally fuck you? So if this girl likes you enough to fuck you it will prove something to yourself that you are a worthy man? And to make this happen you will just change yourself to be something you are not so you can meet the approval of someone else?

This is what I am going to diagnose as PERPETUAL BITCH SYNDROME. Aka: PBS.

Forget Oneitis. Perpetual Bitch Syndrome is like having ALLitis. Sometimes, when curing diseases, superbugs are formed. These bugs are formed by building immunity to the cures of previous illness, usually to improper use of the cure, which in this case is GFTOW.

If GFTOW is not properly used to cure Oneitis, the patient is now susceptible to PBS. PBS is when you alter your values to meet the values of others in order to gain peer approval. Sometimes this starts off as simply telling lies to fabricate a deeper connection or bypass a dealbreaker and has initial positive affects. Over time these symptoms develop further and the AFC may find himself alone and desperate for one girl. The downward cycle repeats as the AFC loses his sense of self, and feeds deeper into his insecurities until being smacked in the face with reality on PUA forums.


Really though. Don't look at pickup as a means to make women like you. Find women you like. Invite said women into adventures you'd be having with or without them.

The last time I was hungry I had dinner. The last time I was bored I did something fun. Boring your date? GO DO SOMETHING FUN!

Nice dinners are romantic and for GIRLS THAT HAVE EARNED A NICE DINNER! They are not a means in which to impress someone. Impression should be a side effect, not a goal. Your goal is to have fun.

Also, it's fucked up that your goal is stated to be "nailing this girl." If you really want to have a hookup buddy, make it with a girl you just met and haven't been on many dates with. At the very least, make your intentions known and she will respect it. If it's a girl you don't want to toy with, then tell her you date multiple people until something gets serious, and if she's really worth monogamy (I threw up in my mouth a little while typing this) then you'll want to hang out with her whether or not you are hooking up.

In the mean time. GFTOW. Always.

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ITS YOUR CHOICE!
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-Ders


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