Staying in contact with ex?



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ShipShape
PostPosted: Thu Jan 16, 2014 7:54 pm 
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Hey guys,

So I have been pondering this topic for a while and wondered what you guys thought of it. Is it ok for someone to keep in contact with their ex if they are in a new relationship?
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Sam0101
PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 2:57 am 
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It depends. For one, your relationship could be that of a friendship now, and that's fine. I have dated many girls who are now really good friends or friends with benefits. There's nothing wrong with it.

Now, if you're trying to get back with her, that's another story.
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n2thevoid
PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 9:30 am 
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What's your intent? If its just friends only, then nothing wrong at all If you're doing so to hold on in hopes something more will come of it, that's fine too just so long as you don't drag somebody else into the picture AND you're being respectful of her wishes.
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ShipShape
PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 8:24 pm 
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Thanks for the responses. I have asked around and found out stuff I didn't think about. For instance, I can understand situations that are logistical in nature and unavoidable, like having a child together.

If that's not the case though, I think the problem is that at one point, there was enough chemistry for a sexual relationship. Because of that, I think that a friendship would have an underlying subtext that couldn't be ignored.
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ShipShape
PostPosted: Sat Jan 18, 2014 8:26 pm 
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I’m not talking about like burning all your pictures or anything. Those are memories of your past. I'm just think that maintaining a friendship is pointless. If you want friendship, go out and meet new people who you haven't been involved with romantically.

I might be wrong though.. would you guys date a chick who was friends with her ex(es)?
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n2thevoid
PostPosted: Sun Jan 19, 2014 7:13 am 
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Quote:
I’m not talking about like burning all your pictures or anything. Those are memories of your past. I'm just think that maintaining a friendship is pointless. If you want friendship, go out and meet new people who you haven't been involved with romantically.

I might be wrong though.. would you guys date a chick who was friends with her ex(es)?

I would date a girl who was friends with an ex. It all depends on your own level of security. If you have in your mind that people shouldn't befriend exes then obviously it won't sit well with you - perhaps the reasons why are worth exploring. As with many things, its grey, not black and white.
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DCL
PostPosted: Wed Jan 22, 2014 11:57 am 
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Quote:
Hey guys,

So I have been pondering this topic for a while and wondered what you guys thought of it. Is it ok for someone to keep in contact with their ex if they are in a new relationship?
You did not provide information. How old are you? How long were you dating? Was it you or she, who decided to break up?

In any case, I would not suggest to communicate for the first 6-12 month, in order to totally get rid of any possible emotional connections and do it only on a clear head.

Please also note, usually, after this term, you will also not see a point of communicating with her at all. You will both change.

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Dark_Sinful
PostPosted: Thu Jan 30, 2014 7:48 pm 
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Who broke up with who?

If you're the one who broke it off, by all means- keep in contact. but remember you're on thin ice. One of you is BOUND to feel emotional attachment to the other again, and it will get messy.

If you're the one who got dumped, this is the dumbest idea, and you just need to meet other girls. and trust me, when you meet someone else who has better chemistry, makes you laugh and not afraid to make fun of you, you wont even remember your ex girlfriend's name.

Be positive. you'll find her.

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