Hey guys, hope yall are having a good holiday. So basically the title says it all. My last girlfriend was extremely straight-forward/open about sex, almost wanted it more than me, and so naturally I didn't have to put much thought into escalating with her. Basically I could just grab her, throw her over the kitchen counter whenever I felt like it, pull down her pants and rail the shit out of her. She loved this. With that said, she had a lot of other issues that came out later and ended up not being good relationship material.

This new girl I'm with (only about 2 months now) has been much more conservative sexually and I'm starting to second guess some of my attempts to escalate (which just makes things worse of course). She works out all the time, has a smoking body IMO, but for whatever reason still seems to have some self esteem issues w/ how she looks. We actually haven't had many opportunities to have sex lately which naturally has me concerned considering how important a good, quality sex life is to almost all women. She's still chasing as much if not more than before, calling and texting me often (w/ plenty of sexual innuendos in a lot of our convos), wanting me to meet her friends, and always trying to make plans to hang out, but I'm still a bit worried here. Usually when we have had sex, I may try and escalate in the kitchen or whatever and she always wants to move it to the bedroom. She's very much a "planner" type and very introverted/thinks a lot, but I know how much most women enjoy great, spontaneous sex. I'm starting to think I'm just not holding enough of a dominant/leader frame.

Any ideas here? Do I need to just keep manning up and pushing until she stops me? Going from a chick that wanted it 24/7 to this has definitely been fucking w/ my head.

Hey man, your post kinda reminded me of a Chris Rock joke... "Man can't go back sexually" so I am attaching the link... watch the second half (from 4:30 onwards), about how men get used to wilder sex and can't go back to more conservative practices...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3dGhsRsHXP8

Some women are less adventurous with sex and if this is important to you, you need to get her on board with your fetishes. Problem here is that talking about it ruins the effect... so you have to be dominant and rough in order to drive the message home. turn her face against the wall and take her from behind, if she says anything, tell her to shut up... if she freaks out, she's not comfortable with this kind of sex life and will take a lot of patience to get her to change... so you may think about moving on...

lol that skit is awesome...so fucking true. Thanks for the advice. I'll prob just continue to push the envelope until she seems uncomfortable with it. So far she's been perfectly fine w/ mild dominance stuff and hasn't stopped me, but I'm always concerned with getting too weird too fast w/ a new girl.

Correct me if I am wrong. Sounds like you take control of the situation and wait for a reaction out of her to see if she is comfortable with it. I agree with the previous post be dominant and dont be afraid to show what you want. Woman do it all the time why cant we.

I have some direct experience here.

Job 1, prepare yourself to lose the relationship. When you have your head wrapped around that then you can make your move.

Plan your move well. You can't take a conservative girl, tie her ass up and whip the shit out of her with full on domination. But you are right, while women don't fantasize about shit all day like we do, they like surprises just as much as the next. So in other words, when you come up behind her in the kitchen and start going to town on her, when she says let's go to the bedroom respond with a firm, no. I want you right here, right now, just like this. You can explain why and how and all that shit after you're both all done, and she will ask.

What I'm saying here is that there is a chance that sex just isn't that important to her. If true, you should decide if you want to stay with a woman like this. Once you have that all under your head, then go find out if the problem is just that she's afraid to show you her kinky side, or if there really isn't one there.

Yeah dont tie her up if she is not into that. might have rape charges on your hand

Get her naked and compliment her on her body while staring passionately at her. This would give her some sort of self-esteem boost. If this doesn't work, enforce yourself. You have to be dominant. Tell her that you want her in that place right now, if she rejects, force yourself to stay and do it. She might be the type who likes to be forced (I've had a girl like this. She would say no to everything, but then I'd grab her and we'd end up really good).

If she still rejects and answers with a serious no or tries to pull away, just eject and re-consider your relationship with her. She clearly has a problem. Talk to her when she's relaxed, if she's still stubborn, I'd say end it (but that's my opinion).