Told her we're going swimming: self-conscious?



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PostPosted: Mon Nov 18, 2013 2:37 pm 
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First and second dates were great. There was a solid connection, LOTS of kino, making out, etc. On the first date we played some darts and made a bet that the loser had to cook the other dinner. She won, so I set everything up to do dinner over at my place Tuesday. I assigned her to dessert duty (she seemed to like this) and said she was really excited. I'm thinking I should have just cut things on a high right there, but I wanted to get her half naked so:

Me: "Me too...oh and don't forget a swimsuit!"
Her: "Are we going swimming?" (I was somewhat tempted to be sarcastic w/ her here)
Me: "Yes...unless you're scared. ;)"
Her: "No...a little pale, but not scared"
Me: "No worries...I'm definitely in the same boat. I won't judge if you don't!"

I took a while to respond to the last one, so she was probably asleep at this point, but overall was the swimming suggestion a bad one? We both workout a lot, and from what I can tell she has a smoking body so I just figured she'd want a chance to show it off.


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 18, 2013 3:35 pm 
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First and second dates were great. There was a solid connection, LOTS of kino, making out, etc. On the first date we played some darts and made a bet that the loser had to cook the other dinner. She won, so I set everything up to do dinner over at my place Tuesday. I assigned her to dessert duty (she seemed to like this) and said she was really excited. I'm thinking I should have just cut things on a high right there, but I wanted to get her half naked so:

Me: "Me too...oh and don't forget a swimsuit!"
Her: "Are we going swimming?" (I was somewhat tempted to be sarcastic w/ her here)
Me: "Yes...unless you're scared. ;)"
Her: "No...a little pale, but not scared"
Me: "No worries...I'm definitely in the same boat. I won't judge if you don't!"

I took a while to respond to the last one, so she was probably asleep at this point, but overall was the swimming suggestion a bad one? We both workout a lot, and from what I can tell she has a smoking body so I just figured she'd want a chance to show it off.
I dont think I am qualified enough to give an opinion here, but just to understand a bit more about the context, in reality, is there even a slim chance that you two could go swimming before or after dinner? If not, then it doesnt make logical sense why you needed to bring it up.

But like I said, I might not be qualified enough and in this game, it is not all about logic...


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 18, 2013 6:48 pm 
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Oops left out a pretty crucial piece of info: My apartment overlooks our pool and there's a hot tub about 50 ft from my balcony.

I realize that didn't make much sense otherwise!


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PostPosted: Sat Nov 23, 2013 8:20 pm 
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An update just in case it's remotely useful for anyone else:

She ended up texting me the morning of saying how excited she was to see me, but still came over w/o a swimsuit. She said she just forgot, but who knows. Either way the dinner went fantastic, we had sex, and she slept over despite having to get up super early for work the next day...so I can't really complain.

Really just curious how I could have framed the hot tub/swimming idea better to make her more likely to comply. Thoughts?


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 25, 2013 7:48 am 
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Erm... "oops. I forgot my swimsuit" means "Well, we'll just have to swim naked then." That would have been a really awesome way to build up the fun for the night, before the sex.

Cause you were obviously going to have sex. Better to build up the excitement instead of just jump straight into it.

Often times you can just jump straight into it, and it will leave her with the whole "buyer's remorse" because it wasn't that special.

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