| So kinda putting myself out here. So back story... had a great relationship with my gf of 3 years. Got into trouble and went to jail for a 19 months for a non-violent offense. During that time she stood by me and visited, wrote and accepted calls. Towards the end we had our tough times, she was getting discouraged, but I finally got parole. Time comes for me to get out. Her family hates me, and her life was on the rocks, and we're now about 90 minutes away from each other. I get out and she is so "scared and guarded". We hang out and things seem fine but I find out that she has someone she was fooling around with before I get out. She says because she is just getting her life back in order, new apartment, finally moving out of living with mom, newer job, finding her sanity and independence. I do the take away, tell her to go live her life and do HER before we drag the relationship into the ground. Since I have things I need to work on and she has things to work on. This goes on for a month with some chatting here and there. Her calling up crying because she is alone in her new apartment, thinking of me missing me. She tells me that she "doesn't want to go another weekend without seeing me". We make plans then all of a sudden its a gf birthday weekend, then next weekend she is going to a music festival, then she tries to see me mid week to "skip out of work early" but both times shes too busy. She shows signs that she is interested, but then other times, as recently, says she needs some space, that I am overwhelming her. I know that I at one moment conveyed neediness and that gave her the needs space speech, but then I give it to her and she is txting me 4 days later, I ignored her and she hit me up the next night, to which I didn't respond until the next morning. She says its weird to go long without talking to me. We have this serious chemistry, but I feel like she is holding back. I don't feel like I should have to get my life back together in order for us to be together. I am pretty decent with woman. I told her I was going on dates and at first she said "she couldn't hear about it", then a few weeks later she pokes fun at how I went somewhere "with my date". So I am trying to feel this out. A part of me wants to, as someone else said, work seriously on my life for a bit, being friends, but I don't want to have this suffering of going on dates, screwing chicks, which I have been, and waiting for her to come back around.... I can get more into it as questions or advice is dolled out! What should I do?
|
CHAT