Loosing the love of my life here. How do I Boomerang?



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PostPosted: Thu Oct 03, 2013 2:53 am 
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Niiice. I wheeled it in a nice TJ when I was visiting last summer.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 03, 2013 3:03 am 
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Niiice. I wheeled it in a nice TJ when I was visiting last summer.
Right on. I own the local shop here in town. So if you're ever this way again, hit me up and we'll hit some trails and grab some drinks in town.


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PostPosted: Thu Oct 03, 2013 10:46 pm 
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Hmmm. I don't know what to do here. She has just posted a picture of Care Bears on my FB wall with the caption "To lighten the mood up in here...". I've been posting a lot about this whole Government shutdown, Affordable Healthcare Act, the capital shooting today, ext. Just political rants satire, and such. I'm pretty passionate about my political viewpoints and like a good debate. She's made it pretty clear a few times that she hates politics and doesn't want to talk about it. So I know that these posts are what she's referring to.

Anyway... Should I acknowledge the post of not?

She seriously can't go a freaking week without contacting me either! It's been 5 days this time. I have never once been the first to contact her. Yet I'm the one who wants to make this work and she's the one saying she needs space to get past her emotional barriers.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 04, 2013 3:47 am 
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Well I ended up just liking her post on my wall. Then about an hour ago, 4 hours after her post, she texted me.

Her- So, smooth sailing, huh?

Me- Yes Ma'am. Things are going great.

Her- Good to hear.

Me- How you holdin' up?

Her- I'm really good. I'm having a moment without any problems in my life. Just trying not to rock the boat.

Me- Awesome! Still can't seem to make it a week though...

Her- Whatever! I just saw your post on FB and wanted to tell you I'm happy about it. (I posted about a business deal that I just made that is good.)

Me- You posted on my wall first goob. You know I have to tease you. ;)

Me- I'm just glad you're doing well

Her- That's cause every time that you came up on my news feed it was unpleasant.

Her- right back at ya Brantley.

Me- I wasn't upset... well I mean about that stuff I was. But life is good. Just everything happening in DC right now is insane. HAHA

Her- Yeah. You know I don't follow that stuff. All it does is irritate people and I'd rather not get worked up.

Me- It's something I'm passionate about and I keep up with. My friends and I like to discuss what's going on. But anyway... I'm trying to finish up some work before a my client gets here. I'll talk to you later.

Her- ok. later.


SOOOOO... I feel like that may have been our worst text conversation ever. I got not a single feeling of love from her end. And I feel like the way I ejected may have been wrong. I felt like I attacked her and then was rude about having to go. Maybe it's because I've just never acted that way to her. But I felt like I came off as a jerk. Anyway. I don't plan to contact her still. I was feeling pretty good about her and I getting back together till this conversation. I almost felt like I was texting my sister or something. It just felt really wrong, the energy.


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PostPosted: Fri Oct 04, 2013 5:10 am 
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Ouch....

I'd like to see hellhounds, heywood or vhoul's advice on this situation


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 2:56 pm 
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This is like something from a Hank Sr song lol.

Man its a tough situation, but I think you should do what you would do with any ol dirty lake Hamilton girl you run into at skinny dip cove, because deep down shes still just a girl. Take her to smiley's and tell her you want to rip her cloths off.

I think to bag her you need to bang her brains out despite what happened earlier. That's what I would do, but every situation is different so go with your gut.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 6:21 pm 
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I had to do a lot of catching up to this thread before posting.

My gut tells me here that she is as you say, a good girl. But one who was hurt, and has trust issues/isn't ready for a relationship. Sometimes you're the right guy, but at the wrong time. I don't think there is a damn thing you can say or do to convince her that she is ready for YOU. She has to reach that conclusion on her own. From there, the question is, where does that leave you and what is most likely to allow her to reach that conclusion.

She expressed a fear of committment. When you do talk to her, I would focus on this. Listen to her verbalize her problems, and then give her a short, logical response to it. Nothing that indicates that you are steering her towards you, just good, solid feedback on why her fears shouldn't be the deciding factor in her decision making process. John Wayne's quote on courage would do her good to hear.

I would also slowly become more distant. Not just as a manipulation tactic, but to preserve yourself. Your mindset needs to be that it is over, she is not gf material because she is not ready for a relationship. Therefore, you should treat her as such. What are you going to do? Orbit her forever hoping she comes around? You like her, you want her, but you can't have her. You can act like a child who is spoiled and forever try to get what you want, or you can act like an adult and accept that you don't always get what you want. When she asks you, tell her you want her, but according to her, you can't have her, so you have to live your life and move on.

Let her miss the great feelings you gave her. Give her a taste of it again, but only on your terms, not when she asks for it. That means you tell her she's sexy when you want to, and when she asks for something, she doesn't always get it from you.

IMHO, this one isn't going to work out. She put a stop to it. Let it stop. And if you end up with her, let it be because you created a new relationship when she isn't afraid of one. YOu have no idea how long it will take for her to reach that place. What if she never does? You still going to be posting here 10 years from now? What she is doing is trying to keep you invested while she sorts her shit out. The problem is, if she can do that, you lower your value, and she has zero incentive to conquer her issues, because you are still there. She will say and do just enough to keep you interested. Rise above that. It's really your best chance to end up with her, and get the best form of "HER" that she can be. Don't settle for less than her best.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 9:11 pm 
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This is like something from a Hank Sr song lol.

Man its a tough situation, but I think you should do what you would do with any ol dirty lake Hamilton girl you run into at skinny dip cove, because deep down shes still just a girl. Take her to smiley's and tell her you want to rip her cloths off.

I think to bag her you need to bang her brains out despite what happened earlier. That's what I would do, but every situation is different so go with your gut.
Dude, seriously, do we know each other? HAHAHAHA!

@ vhou812. I think you nailed it. I have come to the same conclusion. I haven't heard from her since the above conversations. I don't plan to till she contacts me again.

I also went out this weekend and played the game. Hooked up with another girl on Friday night as well as picked up another on Saturday. The Sat. girl has been posting on my FB pretty heavily, which I'm sure she's already seen. The Friday girl isn't much to write home about. Probably HB7-8 at best only because she has a smokin' figure. The girl from Saturday is a Pink looking Bi chick. HB9 if you're into chicks with short hair.

Not sure if this will help or hurt the situation. But honestly, I had a blast. I've come to the conclusion that I can't spend my life walking on egg shells, wondering what will 'help' or 'hurt' my situation. She knows how I feel. She know's where I stand. If she wants me back, I'll cross that road when I get to the junction. Till then. I'll be living my life how I want to.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 9:13 pm 
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This is like something from a Hank Sr song lol.

Man its a tough situation, but I think you should do what you would do with any ol dirty lake Hamilton girl you run into at skinny dip cove, because deep down shes still just a girl. Take her to smiley's and tell her you want to rip her cloths off.

I think to bag her you need to bang her brains out despite what happened earlier. That's what I would do, but every situation is different so go with your gut.
Dude, seriously, do we know each other? HAHAHAHA!

@ vhou812. I think you nailed it. I have come to the same conclusion. I haven't heard from her since the above conversations. I don't plan to till she contacts me again.

I also went out this weekend and played the game. Hooked up with another girl on Friday night as well as picked up another on Saturday. The Sat. girl has been posting on my FB pretty heavily, which I'm sure she's already seen. The Friday girl isn't much to write home about. Probably HB7-8 at best only because she has a smokin' figure. The girl from Saturday is a Pink looking Bi chick. HB9 if you're into chicks with short hair.

Not sure if this will help or hurt the situation. But honestly, I had a blast. I've come to the conclusion that I can't spend my life walking on egg shells, wondering what will 'help' or 'hurt' my situation. She knows how I feel. She know's where I stand. If she wants me back, I'll cross that road when I get to the junction. Till then. I'll be living my life how I want to.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 07, 2013 9:14 pm 
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God I miss hot springs lol so many skeezers.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 5:40 pm 
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Amanda had added a bunch of pictures of her camping trip over the weekend. Then this morning when she got to work I noticed she liked a post I was tagged in. I did a day two with a girl yesterday who tagged me on FB. This :like: was followed by all the pictures she left out of the camping album yesterday. The ones of her and her ex together. Guess he's not the ex anymore.

Still had that heart sinking feeling when I saw the photos. I guess it really is over. Oh well, you win some and lose some. I'm still doing my thing, trying to move forward. Tough nonetheless. Trying to decide if I should delete her off my FB. I still have all my ex's on there. It'd be kind of a bitch move I think.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 6:39 pm 
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Amanda had added a bunch of pictures of her camping trip over the weekend. Then this morning when she got to work I noticed she liked a post I was tagged in. I did a day two with a girl yesterday who tagged me on FB. This :like: was followed by all the pictures she left out of the camping album yesterday. The ones of her and her ex together. Guess he's not the ex anymore.

Still had that heart sinking feeling when I saw the photos. I guess it really is over. Oh well, you win some and lose some. I'm still doing my thing, trying to move forward. Tough nonetheless. Trying to decide if I should delete her off my FB. I still have all my ex's on there. It'd be kind of a bitch move I think.

I'm an advocate of blocking exes on Facebook ateast until you're over them entirely. Depends on the person but I'm a serial profile checker in that situation. It's not a bitch move, it's not about her, it's about whether you can deal with having contact with an ex.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 6:43 pm 
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Just take a month break from Facebook man, it will set you free.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 7:09 pm 
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Just take a month break from Facebook man, it will set you free.
You know, I'd deletethe whole damn thing. But I network my business through Facebook pretty heavily and gross a few thousand a month off my connections made there. It's hard for me to do because of that. I updated most of my builds and such there daily so my clientscan see progress and it works as a revolving portfolio. I have a business page as well. But it seems people dont follow my updates there as much. Something about having a personal page makes the response better. But as it is a personal page, this crap can happen. It's a damned if you do damned if you don't thing.


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PostPosted: Mon Oct 21, 2013 7:51 pm 
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And now she just texted me "hi!"

I'm want to respond but I'm mad so I won't. Only issue. She'll know I'm ignoring her since we both are always quick to respond. The fact I'm ignoring her is childish and weak. Yet if I reply I'm just playing into her bullshit.

Why am I dealing with this drama? My life is so drama free... except this. I seriously hate when I let a girl into my heart and then this happens. So frustrated right now.


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