So those of you that are here often probably already know I have been dating this woman going on 2 years. We moved in together about a year ago and from day 1 it has been hard. Even before she moved in she made me give up a lot of my female friends. Then when she moved in all the real control started. I normally wouldnt have put up with 99% of the stuff she has done and would have cut this whole thing loose long ago but I guess it was my own personal challenge with her. I have never been with anyone for an extended period of time and started to wonder if it was me that was the problem. Now I know it is just the type of women that I am picking for relationships.

I did a bit of research about narcissistic women and it falls right in line with 'princess syndrome', something she has in the worst way. It is always all about her. The conversation is hers and if I am the leader in conversation she accuses me of being too chatty. If I even mention another woman or an ex even if it is just a story from my past it will ruin at least a few hours if not days. Her reactions to other women are totally jealous. She made me give all my friends up and even gives me a hard time when I want to leave town to see family if she cannot be there as well.

Has anyone had experience with this type of woman before? Please dont tell me I gave up my balls and all that crap. I know I messed up when I ignored the flags early on but as I said it was something I did to prove something to myself. I take full responsibility for the situation so dont bash me. Plus I am getting out of it as we speak and believe me when I say that I learned a whole lot just like all of us should do when we go through something like this.

Thanks for your input!

Not longer than about 5 minutes.

I just dumped a FWB that was just like that, they always the first ones to hold claim that they are NOT like that.

It sounds miserable Bro, GTFO!

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Well it is not as easy to move on seeing as how she is living with me but I am working on it. Thanks!

Not for longer than 5 minutes! Kidding but I had the advantage of being raised by a horrible narcissist... that was a model to boot. They wont change, almost hard wired. The most important part of your post is the last paragraph where you "learned" something. There are no failures in life brother... learn from this, learn her type, and then recognize it sooner and RUN! Seriously, RUN.

I have a buddy that sought out this type of woman so he could "save" them until his life was over. I had to do the math and call him to see if his second child with this shedevil was born. Its the saddest thing Ive seen... but she won. She has complete control over his life. Awhile back we were out drinking and he was all sad and he asked me if I have liked any of his GFs ever. I said no, he got pissed and claimed that he liked every one of my serious GFs. I tried to explain how his life was his to lead and that I never let people like that in my life. My GFs are always total sweetheart types.

Make a list of what you want from a relationship and never deviate from it, period.

_________________
My personal mantra:

"Every woman's a whore in the right situation"
"They're all selling it for something"
"She's sluttier than you think she is"

Thanks for the reply. I wish it could just be all over with but I guess I made my own bed when I let her move in. Now I have to go through lots more drama Im sure to get her out. Oh well, as a friend says, 'I have pulled the pin.' He means the pin in the grenade. Once it comes out it is hard to get back in. Once you decide you have had enough it is hard going back so I guess I will see you guys in the other forums soon. I know the usual recommendations are to GFTOW and things of that sort but I honestly just want some time alone after this one. But dont worry, I will be back in the game soon enough!!

This is not bashing you but the truth:
No. She is not a narcissist. You are trying to find a syndrome to label her so you don't accept that the one with the emotional problem is YOU. You can't be a pussy (giving up friends , letting her control things, and going through shit for a year for no reason) and then act like there is something wrong with her for doing what she can get away with easily. That's like a girl purposefully going into a neighboorhood where there is alot of rape happening, getting raped every night for no reason and then saying that the guys raping her are sickos. No, the biggest sicko in that situation is the girl going there. Weird analogy. Ask yourself, who is the crazy one? Who gives up their friends for a "challenge" like this? What kinda SICK challenge is that

Agreed.


I think its entirely possible that she's a complete narcissist and he engages in self deprecating behaviors. I find most people attract who they are not what they want.

_________________
My personal mantra:

"Every woman's a whore in the right situation"
"They're all selling it for something"
"She's sluttier than you think she is"

As I explained in my original post I know I am in a bad situation. You dont need to tell me that I messed up and created this situation. The fact that she expected all these changes in the beginning and even after many many many battles and compromises on my part she still expects more begs the question of whether she is a narcissist.

Hey, Bro, your fault/her fault, who gives a shit. IT DIDN'T/ISN'T WORK/ING!
You man-ed up to face it! Kudos, it take balls to 'pull the pin.'

I'm quite sure it'll get all drama-riffic for you soon. You realize this and it sounds as though you are ready to face that head on as well.
I have every reason to believe this to be true. (Assuming your referring to waiting til -after- the shit hits the fan, and falls where it may.)

Take the time to fix Trevino, (at least before a new relationship, a random here and there wont hurt!)

Crazy-Proof Yourself. Face it. you've probably been involved with a high-conflict, abusive personality disorder, narcissist. or just plain bat shit crazy woman.

And you let it happen. And you know it.

Knowing is only the pry bar used to crack open the door of change.

You have to break your unhealthy attraction patterns, you need to gain more self confidence about your own relationship goals and start making different choices.

Fuck whom so ever you want, but know your relationship goals, and NEVER settle.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Thanks for the words of encouragement. This has been a really tough break up so far and it is only really just getting started. I guess its so hard because it has been such a bad situation for so long now I am just ready to be done with it.

It is funny how the mind works though. Even as miserable as this has been lately and as sure as I am that I want to move on there is still part of me in my stomach/heart area that actually hurts like pain. I know it would be so easy to just take her back but then what am I going back to? Another two weeks then we start over again?

There should be a whole forum focused on breaking up!

[/quote]There should be a whole forum focused on breaking up![/quote]

Agreed.

I dont think any one is bashing you brother but sometimes one has to face the hard truths. Its hard to hear but grow from them. I had a string of LTRs cheat on me. At some point I had to sit down and look at myself even tho I wasnt the cheater. I figured it out and fixed the issue. Thats all we are saying.... learn to stop this behavior.

_________________
My personal mantra:

"Every woman's a whore in the right situation"
"They're all selling it for something"
"She's sluttier than you think she is"

Hence I said she may not be or isn't. As bad as she was, if you let her control you in the beginning can you say whether she is a control freak? The next guy she is with may laugh when she mentions him getting rid of his female friends and she may never be that way again. Same way there are some girls who are gold diggers and always looking to mooch off of guys, but there are also normal girls who if they are pampered by a guy they get accustomed to it, go with it and ask for more. As Heywood said, the better question is why did you put up with it? Fix your situation, get your friends back and dont ever do that again.