Are opinion openers still relevant?



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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 6:24 am 
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Ok, so the title might be a little harsh, but hopefully it got your attention.

A few years back, opinion openers seem to be the the most popular type of opener there is. It's under the radar, does not display interest, and is more likely to allow a conversation to flow.

However, with Neil Strauss popularizing it in his book, and the PUA community being more and more well known to the general public, are woman starting to catch on to opinion openers?

What do you think? Do you still use them? Or are they a thing of the past?


Last edited by annms on Mon Aug 19, 2013 3:59 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 6:37 am 
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Personally I am using opinion openers in my approach, be it night or day, and they worked for me. They are easy to use and give you high chance of reaching hook point without creeping anybody out. Although certain openers might get out-dated and really popular, the principles behind them are essentially the same. You just want to strike up a conversation with an open-ended topic, not to hit on anybody.

The key thing in opinion openers is that you have to sound genuinely friendly but not recited from a script or trying to sell something. Also create your own opinion openers so you won't run into the risk of being caught. One of the opinion opener I created is "I have a friend who's girlfriend wants to learn martial art, should my friend be worried?"

But of course it's better have a few other different styles of openers under your belt, like situational or direct. Don't just rely solely on opinion openers as they can be really situational.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 10:29 am 
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In my opinion, they sound artificial in pretty much all social situations unless you are at a gallery and ask her thoughts about the piece you're looking at, for example.
They are especially bad at bars where people can barely talk anyway.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 4:49 pm 
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I am basically a novice, but have had some success with opinion openers.

I really like opinion openers when the target is in a set with guys in it. You won't be perceived as hitting on the girl if you do this. Make sure that the guys are involved, and throw in a neg. It's actually pretty easy to win the guys over in a conversation, just talk to them like they are your friend. I like opinion openers regarding relationships, because it can lead to a very long easy conversation involving both genders.

I rarely use an opinion opener if I am opening a single, and when I do, I usually regret it. When you open one girl, be more direct or situational.

What really makes the difference is the tonality, and your body language when you are giving the opener. Don't be too approval seeking, and make it appear spontaneous.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 4:55 pm 
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I've always hated opinion openers. They just show you don't have the balls to show direct interest.

High risk = High reward.

Low risk = Low reward.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 5:52 pm 
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Eh, I kinda like them. It depends on your frame and being congruent. An aggressive direct opener doesn't work for many people; yea they can change who they are, but it's easier to just use an opener that will work better for who one is NOW. Opinion openers work well in a lot of scenarios. Honestly, opening is about delivery more than content.

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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 6:12 pm 
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you can still use them

if a girl opens up and talks to you, that's a successful opener, a good opener leads to a good conversation


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 7:06 pm 
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^^ Perhaps I should clarify the above. Just because I hate opinion openers, doesn't mean I go direct 100% of the time eg. If I get introduced to a girl within a social circle or or when i daygame, it's not always appropriate to go direct. I tend to just start with a normal friendly conversation with eye contact and long social touching to warm them up. Then later you can get them into a night setting or arrange to meet another time.

If you go indirect, you can just start a natural conversation, there's no need for opinion openers. I'm not against the idea of throwing in an opinion CONVERSATION after you've already opened naturally, but to open and say "Excuse me, I need your opinion, do women cheat more?" is just weird and unnatural to me. Sure, if you're good, it works. But more importantly, if you're good, you don't need opinion openers.

Nerds who are so nervous that they have to rely on opinion openers should be working on their ordinary social skills instead, NOT that magic opinion opener to "cure" their approach anxiety. I see a lot of posts on here saying "I opened a hot girl, she seemed interested, NOW what??". Therein lies the problem. Once the opinion opener fizzles out, a lot of these guys panic and screw up interactions because they haven't learned how to have natural flowing conversations even with guys, let alone girls. This is why I would never recommend this to noobs, unless the purpose of your PUA journey is to annoy random women with weird questions, instead of just being smooth and introducing yourself.


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PostPosted: Mon Aug 19, 2013 10:22 pm 
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poster I think all these answers are good. To give my opinion on your question, I don't like it for openers. Girls have heard variations of it, they are generally on to it, unless they are girls that don't get hit on much. A lot of times I try to use some open ended opinion question in a routine but that might be 5 minutes after the conversation starts. For the most part, a female is going to get the idea you don't have much experience talking to women if you are doing opinion openers. Most will still be friendly and give the answer but many will be wanting to get away from the conversation just b/c they know what you are doing.

If you are new to approaches, I think your own personally scripted opinion opener to get you talking is fine but I think the singles community is generally at a point it's not as effective as it was 5 or 10 years ago. I think if you are going to design one, don't make it some long story about your best friend and his girl friend and roommate type of stuff or do you think this couple should go on Maury povich


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 3:56 am 
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It doesn't matter what you say, what matters mosts if the energy you bring and how authentic you seem... approach a women to have fun... not with the end result in mind...

That's my philosophy!


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 6:27 am 
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Thanks guys for the responses.

I think most of you didn't really get my question though (except wingintyme). I'm not questioning the intrinsic effectiveness of opinion openers.

What I was wondering is: given that the PUA community being more well known nowadays, plus people popularizing opinion openers (eg. Neill Strauss), many women may now be aware of opinion openers. Even if you have a great opinion opener that suits you very well, delivered with perfect tonality, a woman savvy to PUA/opinion openers would think "oh, a stranger asking for my opinion, he must be one of those pick-up-artist guys who hit on girls but cover it up by asking for their opinions"


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 6:45 am 
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They have their uses. You can call the girl cute and show your interest at any time.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 8:34 am 
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Quote:
Thanks guys for the responses.

I think most of you didn't really get my question though (except wingintyme). I'm not questioning the intrinsic effectiveness of opinion openers.

What I was wondering is: given that the PUA community being more well known nowadays, plus people popularizing opinion openers (eg. Neill Strauss), many women may now be aware of opinion openers. Even if you have a great opinion opener that suits you very well, delivered with perfect tonality, a woman savvy to PUA/opinion openers would think "oh, a stranger asking for my opinion, he must be one of those pick-up-artist guys who hit on girls but cover it up by asking for their opinions"

Yes, especially in cities where they run big boot camps like LA. Which is even more reason not to use opinion openers.


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PostPosted: Tue Aug 20, 2013 8:43 am 
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Quote:
Thanks guys for the responses.

I think most of you didn't really get my question though (except wingintyme). I'm not questioning the intrinsic effectiveness of opinion openers.

What I was wondering is: given that the PUA community being more well known nowadays, plus people popularizing opinion openers (eg. Neill Strauss), many women may now be aware of opinion openers. Even if you have a great opinion opener that suits you very well, delivered with perfect tonality, a woman savvy to PUA/opinion openers would think "oh, a stranger asking for my opinion, he must be one of those pick-up-artist guys who hit on girls but cover it up by asking for their opinions"
this seems to come under the assumption that the opener is very important and it's the conversation that is 100% responsible for how the pickup goes

the thing is a lot of girls go out clubbing because they want male attention, they want to be picked up or go out dancing with their friends with a chance to reject guys for an ego boost to prove to themselves that they are attractive

more important then your opener is who you are and how you are perceived, how you dress, how you stand, how you walk, what you look like both fitness wise and genetically, in general, girls want to be with physically attractive socially important guys that have the means to protect and provide for their possible kids, so everything down to how you hold your posture and speak is important

the opener is while relevant is fairly insignificant in the big picture of things and if she perceives you to be ''one of those pickup guys'' that can actually work in your favor or against you depending on the girl and how she perceives you

things like the opener shouldn't really be of too much concern to you, instead you should just consider what you are trying to accomplish when meeting these girls, where are you leading this too? what information would be of value to the person in front of you and what information is of value to you, how do you want to present yourself and what would you like to know about the person you are presenting yourself to, what are you trying to accomplish in the pickup? how do you plan to do this?

then practice your game ''plan'' and improve upon it and make it more efficient until you have come up with a plan that works for you


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