Girl who's been MIA



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 Post subject: Girl who's been MIA
PostPosted: Mon Jan 21, 2008 11:13 am 
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I'm new here and would love to get some feedback on this. Late October of last year, I began messaging a girl on Myspace. It started off with just short messages back and forth, but evolved into long and thoughtful letters (10 paragraphs +). She would talk about any random thing which I thought was cute. I was grateful that she was so open with me and felt a real connection with her. I finally got her number in early December. I called a couple of times, but she never picked up. I figured after 2 unanswered calls, she probably changed her mind about me. I decided to make a final attempt, and messaged her through Myspace. I said something along the lines of, "sorry you changed your mind about me. it's been good exchanging messages for the past couple of months. goodbye and best of luck." She messaged back literally within an hour. She said she gets shy talking to new people over the phone. That's why she didn't pick up or call back. Is that a valid excuse? She could've texted back, or at least messaged me through Myspace saying she got my voicemails. She was planning on going home (out of state) for a month since school's out, so this was my last chance to meet her before she left. I ended up having to arrange our first meeting by texting her.

We met at an arcade and played some games for a little bit. She's quite attractive in person, but we didn't really get a chance to talk much. She was too focused on the games (she's a game fanatic). After we got done at the arcade, I tried to talk to her a bit as I walked her to her car. She was nice, but seemed a bit shy. Avoided eye contact with me. She offered to drive me me to my car, and I accepted. Once we got to my car, I made a final attempt to impress her. I went to my car and got out a Christmas gift for her. It's the CD soundtrack to one of her all time favorite movies. All of a sudden, a switch in her flipped on. Her eyes lit up and she gave me a big hug. She was a motormouth after that.... saying stuff like, "we should totally hang out after I come back. we can swim or use the hot tub at my apartment, do other stuff....oh, and if you give me your address, i'll have my mom mail you some of her baked goods....I'll write to you in the next couple of days." She gave me another big hug before we drove off.

So for the month that she's been away, I haven't heard from her at all. She didn't write to me like she said she would and hasn't logged into Myspace since we met in person. I texted her a New Year's greeting and asked how she was doing, but I got no response. I left her a Myspace message saying it was good to meet her and that I'd definately like to get to know her better. I'm not sure if she's even read the message yet. She's suppose to be back sometime next week. Should I wait for her to respond back, or should I try contacting her again? Since she still refuses to talk to me over the phone (due to shyness), should I text her to arrange a second meeting? If so, how would you guys recommend that I approach this? Any feedback is greatly appreciated. I'm new to "The Game" and know I've broken a lot of the rules. Please help me get moving in the right direction. Thanks.


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PostPosted: Mon Jan 21, 2008 2:28 pm 
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Wait for her to contact you back. You are the "prize" and the non-needy one. Don't break your frame and message her too much, or it'll appear creepy.

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PostPosted: Mon Jan 21, 2008 9:25 pm 
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yeah Smooth is exactly right. If she is interested, which most likely she is, she will contact you when she comes back.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 10:53 pm 
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Quote:
yeah Smooth is exactly right. If she is interested, which most likely she is, she will contact you when she comes back.
So she got back over the weekend and texted the following, "i'm back from my trip. it was a loooong drive, and i'm pooped, but i'll hit you up soon to catch up."

it's been 5 days since the text....should I follow up? If so, how? My female friends say that I should just ask her out since she's probably expecting me as a guy to take the initiative. Will doing so lower my value? I welcome your feedback.


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 30, 2008 11:23 pm 
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Taking the lead on asking her out is perfectly acceptable! Call her and ask her out to do something.

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PostPosted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 2:43 am 
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Taking the lead on asking her out is perfectly acceptable! Call her and ask her out to do something.
so i said to her, "i'm hitting up an awesome sushi place this wed. you should come." her text back was, "my dad is in town with me 'til next week. :("

is this just an excuse? if she wasn't interested, she would just ignore me. is that a correct assumption? how should I proceed from here?


Last edited by jimbo162 on Mon Feb 11, 2008 1:51 am, edited 1 time in total.

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 Post subject:
PostPosted: Tue Feb 05, 2008 3:42 pm 
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Man, you need to relax and stop being so needy. First thing you have to relize is that half the world population is female. You don’t need this one girl.
Second she isn’t avoiding you; it seems she is being honest. Just cut back on the messaging and take her word for it. Why would she be lying to you. Your major problem is that your going to come across as needy. You need to avoid this at all costs.


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PostPosted: Thu Feb 21, 2008 1:04 am 
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That looks like an excuse man. If Brad Pitt phoned up and said does she want to go out, I'm sure she'd find time.

One way to get around this is to time constrain it. "Come between 7:30 and 8:30" Or come round for 1/2 hour to see xyz. I'm doing xyz at my place. Come round for an hour.

When she does come round. Then you'll see your faced with other issues and realise that the girl coming over to your place isnt really that big a deal. Its the same as meeting a new girl in the street.

If she's not coming round it means either. No attraction. or No comfort. Or you haven't qualified. When you have these, then you can you go for the "bounce." She SHOULD come around.

Then just try and leave straight away. Otherwise all the comfort ends up in one location.


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