Okay so here's a quick backstory:

I started talking to this girl about 3 weeks ago, she goes to the same school, im grade 12 shes grade 11. Probably a 8. So we've talked alot in person, but dont really text too much, mostly to plan when were going to chill. So the first two times went good. First time chillin we had a fire in the back yard and then went for a walk, lots of light Kino. Mostly things like rubbing up against each other all night. Drove her home after the walk, it was around midnight. Second time chilling she invighted me to go see a funny movie. That also went well, I had my arm around her and she was snuggled up too me the entire movie. And this is where I get completely lost... So the next time we chill which is like 3 days later, were at a party.

So I'm mostly talking to my friends and a bunch of other people for the first hour, after this I see her and we talk and stuff and I brush up against her butt and back every couple minutes. We talked and planned on going mini golfing 4 days later.. After we talk for about 15 minutes we go our separate ways because I needed a drink and she had to go to the washroom. I see her again in about an hour and shes pretty drunk and theres this guy all over her and she goes along with it.. Didnt hook up with him she said. I was supposed to walk her home but she insisted on staying even though the party was over.. I think it was because this guy was still there. So I just said okay whatever and left (Didn't make a big deal over it). She text me the next day saying it was dumb of her to like rubbing up against the guy and all the jazz, I said "Okay, I was having fun entertaining the rest of the party anyhow " and that went over good.

Then 2 nights ago we went to another party where she was a little drunk and I drove us (my friend and her and her friend) to the party. We talked for a little while and then we went our separate ways and she dissapeared for like 2 hours and went to some guys tent. She said once she got out that they are good friends and they were just talking. When we were walking home we were holding hands and having a deep conversation and it was fantastic till we got to me car to drive the rest of the way, about 5 minute drive. She was in the back seat with my friend and he told me afterwards that she was trying to cuddle with him most of the time. she had her hand on his stomach and stuff like that.

I thought we had a thing going on, but what would you guys say about this. Is it okay because we've only hung out like 4 times. Or should I just end the whole thing? I really like her when shes sober and shes so easy to talk to. But its at partys where she turns into a whole different person. Any tips on where to go from here?

I think the mistake you're making here is having a date with her at a party. I am strongly against that idea because other guys will hit on her and competition is fierce. Remember, attraction is not a choice, sometimes she can't control her emotions. I would say go out with her on more simple dates; like having a coffee nearby, watch a movie and build connection with her until you can safely say she's yours.

Also I would also advice to not get too hung up by the situation, show more willingness to walk away (a DHV) and don't let her run over you. You made a wrong move by replying "Okay, I was having fun entertaining the rest of the party anyhow " when she admitted she was wrong the next day. You forgave her too easily. You have to assert yourself and show that you're unhappy by replying something like "All right you're losing me, don't text me again". If you easily forgive her for doing such a thing, she might think you're weak and will not be afraid to do it again. You need to 'punish' her by pushing her away. Doing so demonstrates that you are the leader in the relationship, and you have other options. The key mentality is that you are the prize and she's chasing after you. Believe it or not, women find this a lot more sexy than a guy allowing her to do whatever she likes in the relationship.

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You only have 2 choices; either you cry and accept who you are, or get your ass out there and try to change yourself.

for a guy with only 6 posts the guy above is making a lot of sense.

Unless you are fairly certain of social dominance dont meet girls out at social events where you dont have control of what other people around you may or may not due concerning your target. If your interested in this girl seek to isolate her going forward, when shes in a group you are now in competition with an external group of people which is nothing but an unnecessary obstacle and distraction.

Ask her to meet you for a drink after the party/event/concert.

Wow that sounds really good! I'll let you guys know what happens next!

Want to know one thing I didn't read here? "We made out..." Or even "I went for the kiss ..." You hung out with her twice, both times you got close, neither time did you even TRY to kiss her... Then you go to a party (don't listen to the guy above, no offense to him, but going to a party with a girl is fine. Competition is a great tester, you test yourself and you test her. Don't be scared of it, embrace it you're a man! Trying to hide her away like a pussy is weak as fuck), you are talking and brushing against her, there is alcohol in assuming and AGAIN you don't take action.

Here comes the tough love stick: stop being a godamn pussy and go for what you want. You can't fail to claim what you want after ample opportunity, then bitch and moan when she's all over another guy! When she messages the next day she's basically BEGGING for you to do something! My god I wish adult girls were this forgiving. If you want something, you gotta fucking take it. Girls almost never forgive a lack of action and you have just been given 3 fucking chances!

Oh and don't "punish" her when she messages you again! What are you? A teenage girl? Don't ever blame girls or anyone for you own mistakes. Especially when it's something as simple as not having the balls to pull the trigger. What you said was fine in that context, better would have been "it's cool let me know when you want to hang out again." Then shut the fuck up and don't message or call until she says when or asks you to set a time.

Course of action? If/when you see her again, kiss her as fast as possible, in the first 5 minutes. Set that as you timeframe as the longest you will wait. Go for it right away even, first thing you do is give her a hug, kiss her cheek then pull back while you are still holding and just stair into her eyes with a cheeky smile. She holds your gaze, fucking do it, don't be a fucking pussy.

Alright I think I understand what you guys are getting at.. Basically - dont be a wuss, Hurry up and make a damn move already - Stop making such a huge deal out of this.

Also a side note... Decided last minute I was going to have a little get together hangout thing at my house.. went good. Just watched some baseball and played games. Just casual drinks. Texted her about an hour and a half before and asked if she wanted to come. Texted me back at around 1230 Saying she was just going to have a girls night. Still trying to figure out what to say back.. I think im going to go with what mattr said and just say "Okay no biggy, just let me know when you want to hang out again" and then go on about with me life till she texts me next

Actually I would agree with Mattr, you failed to escalate quickly and you blew up the attraction window. To be frank I have a feeling it would near impossible to get her back judging from her reply, missing the attraction window is very hard to recover from.

Don't feel too discouraged, I also made the same mistake in the past before I knew about the game. There was an occasion where I manage to invite a girl to my place to watch a movie together. She was giving me major IOIs; like have her sitting beside me very closely on the bed, our legs were touching etc. I totally fail to pick that up and all I did was awkwardly place my arms around her after the movie which of course end horribly. Thinking back there was so many things I could have done right; like proper comfort building, kino escalation and kiss close gambits. But still it was a good learning experience.

I also would agree with Mattr that there's nothing wrong with having dates in a party, but it is definitely not the best option. Unless you're really experienced with the game and very confident about being able to compete with other guys hitting on her, it's better to stack the odds in your favour and have simple dates if you're inexperienced with the game.

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You only have 2 choices; either you cry and accept who you are, or get your ass out there and try to change yourself.

this is a lame text, it establish you as the low value one waiting about for her on her timetable.

Let me suggest an alternative, dont text her back at all about this. I always suggest the best way to answer non-complieing texts is no text unless you know what you are doing, and even then no text is sometimes better.

holy smokes, all this stuff is pretty damn confusing. One person says one thing and another says something completely different. Although that does make sense about me seeming low value. I wish I had have known that earlier today when I texxted her that thing about texting me when she wants to chill. Any suggestions on what to do now? I did like her but again I think both of us are out of the attraction phase so I'm thinking about just telling her that her and I should just remain friends. I could care less about this whole thing anymore.

I realize this whole situation was a flop so if you guys could give me suggestions on what to do so this whole thing doesnt happen again that would be pretty helpful. I learnt out of this situation that I need to go for more stuff meaning, dont just sit and wait for it to happen, Escalate and go for the kiss and everything like that. Also, Im decent at flirting I think, which probably means im shit aha, but I find it super easy to be funny and make girls laugh, the first couple dates always go well meaning we have fun and after that it just goes downhill. What can I do to prevent this from happening?

So basically what Im getting at from those two paragraphs is: What would you do in my current situation, and What would you think I should do/change to ensure that the next girl I go for doesnt end up like the current one?

Ive read all the replies and everyone is saying the same thing but just addressing different parts of your failure.
The basic points outlined here are to escalate faster and dont be a low value pussy. You may be best served by reading some game related books.
Yes this is the classic nice guy fail of creating friendly rapport before attraction which eventuates in friend-zoning. Learn to create attraction by conveying high value and knock off the nice funny guy rapport nonsense, it isn't working.

Okay thanks, and Any suggestions for books?

And you may think I should stop being the funny guy but that's who I am, I think I just need to find a way to control how I use my humor to use it to my advantage rather than making myself look like a nice guy pussy like you said. Which I Agree.. It has been making me look like that.

I pm'ed you lest I derail this thread

It's only a bad text if you are coming from a position of weakness. If you have set yourself up as an attractive and confident guy who goes for what he wants it forces them to chase you if they want you. it also makes it clear that you aren't going to chase them. Especially if you never actually initiate contact from then on. After all, you don't have to hang out with her when she texts if you can't/don't want to. You can always say "no, but x time is good!"

In this case he's failed to escalate and yes you are right it comes across as weak, but only because if his previous actions and the fact that she just said no to hanging out. The best response to her "no" is no response. You should never ever give time to people who don't give time to you. That goes for all aspects of life, not just game.