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How can you prevent a flake or not come off as AFC when responding to their excuse.
The only way to PREVENT a flake is by running proper game and making sure you are doing things right. If a girl flakes on you... that means you fucked up somewhere along the way.
This is not entirely true, women flake for all kinds of reasons. I've had woman flake on me then later admit they were too nervous, or had a bad hair day, or felt fat that day, etc etc.... Anything from their own insecurities, to talking them selves out of it or friends talking them out of it, to their current emotional state at the time of the flake.
Some women need re-assurance, some need to be chased a bit more, some just need you to take control and not except the "flake".( this has to be gauged by you)
The key is to capitalize on the initial emotions that lead to her wanting to meet up with you in the first place. Keep that fire hot until she is standing in front of you. Where men are logical, women are emotional.
Unfortunately it's almost impossible to know what is going on in the woman's mind at the time of a flake. Woman naturally over think things, everything. All you can do is try to create the emotional state she was in when the initial attraction was there.
As far as how to deal with a flake, It's best to always act as though it's no big deal. No matter how bad you wanted to hook up. The less you can show it bothers you the better. Women will even flake the first time as a shit test to see if you will continue to pursue or give up or flip out.
How do I know all of this? it's simple. Ask the women. any woman.