| So after a long day of work last Wed. a couple of buddies and I are out at our local bar sharing a few drinks. About 5 or 6 drinks into it, we notice a slew of girls walk into the bar. Such a crowd is not typical for a Wed. As I tried to figure out what was going on, I saw them all begin to congregate into a special room in the bar for a private party. At that point I lost interest until...
...An HB 8 walks out of the private room, past us, and towards the bathroom. She's eying my group of friend and I the entire time. As she comes back, I see her order from across the bar, and when we lock eyes she gives me a big smile. That sort of bold IOI on an HB's part is not typical, so I waved her over to us with my index finger and she came scurrying.
"What's going on in there?" I asked.
"You don't want to know" she replied.
"Come on, you've got to tell us."
"Fine, its a speed dating session."
From her I found out that for $30 you could have signed up to meet every girl in that party in 5 minute intervals. You just keep moving around the room sitting at different tables like musical chairs. After a little more flirting she went back into the party and I told my friends, "I've got to get in there."
Mind you, I'm pretty drunk at this point. I am in NO WAY dressed for the occasion. But I figured what the hell and barged into the party anyways. By this point, they were about halfway through rotating around, and I just tried to ease in. Unfortunately, I was caught by the administrator who asked, "What are you doing here?"
"I'm here for the speed dating, of course!" I replied
"Oh, well let me check the list...I don't see you on here."
"AAh, see this is my local dive bar. I live down the street. Maybe I signed up for next week."
"No problem, we can move you in. But the session's half over."
"Give me halfsies on the price and you've got yourself a deal!"
As I was doing this I was watching the eyes of the HB 8 I had spoken to earlier. She couldn't stop looking over in disbelief. I couldn't pay much attention to her, though, as it was time to start my drunken speed dating adventure. First, though, I had to write my name-tag. Everyone just put their name. I figured "Esperanto the Pimp" (real name though) would be suitable.
Basically, you get five minutes to woo some girl across the table. This is a PERFECT situation for any aspiring PUA. No AA. No interruptions. Just you and the HB. And the key to doing well is simple: act cocky funny and playfully neg like crazy. You've got five minutes...make the conversation interesting. I saw so many guys asking the boring questions like, "Where are you from?" and "What do you do?" I made it a point to not ask that, and if a girl tried to ask me that, I told her, "Listen, we've got five minutes, we're not going down that line of conversation." Then bring up something totally ridiculous like her take on organic food in order to keep it playful.
Eventually, I made it to the HB 8. She asked what I was doing, I told her I was crashing the party. At this point, she just asked me flat out, "Do you want to hang out some time?" I answered with a yes and she broke out a pen and paper and wrote down her number. Easiest number close I've ever had.
I only got to speak to 4 girls I was interested in, and I "matched" with two of them. I'm told thats actually pretty good. Regardless, I'm seeing the HB 8 this Wed.
Guys, if you ever want to have some fun, speed date. The key is, treat it like a joke, like something fun and funny, and you will do well. If anyone asks you why you aren't taking it seriously, just say, "Hey, we've got five minutes, all that personal info can be figured out on the next date. I'm just trying to see if I vibe with anyone."
Peruse it, use it, abuse it, but don't confuse it. Try not to bruise it.
-Esperanto
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