I have a lot of sticking points but I want to get your advice on one interaction in particular so maybe you can help me build some attraction here. Im doing online stuff at OKC, and my profile is killer enough to get a lot of conversations going but I lose them pretty quick. This is one that went good, and we went on our first date on Saturday.
This convo only went good because we happen to have some stuff in common, my fear is though that i am not building attraction and comeing off as a friend. Advice?
Whole interaction:
Website:
Me: You’re pretty good looking, for a girl.
Her: Eh we’ll thank you. I guess you seem pretty okay.. for a guy.
Me: Are you an only child?
Her: Ha. No, I am not actually. How about yourself?
Me: I have an older sister and a much younger adopted sister too. You’re pictures remind me of a conversation I was having with my roommate the other day. We were talking about whether or not reptiles as pets have the ability to form bonds with humans like cats and dogs.
Her: Awe cool. I have a younger brother and sister. Hmmm yeah I don’t think reptiles do. They are definitely not like cats or dogs. They are not the friendliest of pets have. I think they just learn to tolerate there owners more than anything. Ha.
Me: I used to have rattle snakes when I was in middle school, but I think that’s a growing up in New Mexico kind of thing. Lol
Her: Interesting.. You got quite the variety of rattlers in New Mexico for sure. So were you going out and catching them yourself? Sounds like something I would have been doing. Unfortunately the one rattler in this area I have yet to run into..
Me: I would catch them myself, not by hand though. I had a couple pigmy rattlers and a diamond back. My mom eventually got mad about hearing them rattle every time she went in the back porch and made me let them go. lol What type is in this area?
Her: Awe.. pigmys are cool. My friend has a nice little collection of them.. and both diamondbacks. We apparently have timbers in this area. I would LOVE to find one. That is one of my goals this summer. Ha. Perhaps if I head more south I will have a better chance at finding one... like the gorge maybe?
Me: Sounds dangerous, you are going to need a sidekick
Her: Just a little. A sidekick? Hmmm... that would be pretty nice. Ha.
Me: We should hang out in a public place first, just in case you turn out to be a total creep.
Her: Right. Definitely could be a creeper, so we should do that. Whenever you up for hanging let me know.
Me: We can start by exchanging numbers, as long as you can promise that your not crazy
Her: We could do that. xxx-xxx-xxxx. We should probably exchange names as well. I'm ____.. and you?
Now Texting:
Me: Jeez ___. Is it always this easy to get your number!?
Me: Im just messing with you. I’m ____ By the way. If you can guess who this is
Her: Well hi _____. Yes…. I have a pretty good idea of who this is. Ha. How’s your Friday night going?
Me: im just relaxing with a couple friends. You?
Her: Just relaxing with no friends. Ha. Im pretty tired from my class tonight, so im not doing much.
Me: When do you have time to be my full-fledged wildlife tour guide?
Her: Haha anytime sir. Usually free on the weekends if you want to go on some adventures.
Me: We should have a drink and go to the museum,
Me: People keep telling me I need to go
Her: Yes I’ve heard too. I have only been a couple times but that sounds fun. When are you free?
Me: They are only open on Saturdays. I could make time tomorrow if your available
Her: Ok I can do that, what time would you want to meet up? I think they are only open till about 5.
Me: There’s a place called the ______ we can meet there for a drink and if you don’t scare me off we could walk to the museum from there, say around 1 PM-ish, I’m flexible.
Her: Ok. Ha. I know where the ________ is. How about 2 instead though?
Me: I can do 2.
So the date went decent, I tried to be conscious of my body language and basically didn’t give her any of it. We talked about her interests, which is basically snakes and yoga. She is kind of an odd ball. But so am I so I had a lot of stories to share with her about catching snakes when I was a little kid.
We went to the art museum but neither of us knew anything about art, I nagged her by telling her not to embarrass me in here. At one point she called a woman on the painting “ugly” and I negged her for being shallow. She mentioned that one of the guys on a painting was “cute”, to which I replied “Yea he’s pretty hot”. (I do this all the time when a woman talks about attractive men, im not sure how it comes off though. I feel like it’s kind of a jealousy test or something on her part).
Anyway, it went fairly well. I did not detect any ioi’s but there were a few times when I got into her space while looking at a painting and she didn’t seem repelled.
Towards the end I was getting pretty bored with the art, and I think she was too. The walk back to the car hinted of stagnation, no playfulness. So I cut it short and said that im going to call it a day, my friends need me. She said “yea I was just going to say that I need to go too” and continued to go into a fairly legitimate reason for it.
As we walked back to the bar it was hot as hell and I was getting all sweaty and uncomfortable, especially because she is super in shape and I didn’t want her to notice that I was fatigued from the walk. I told her that I had to depart because I was parked down a road that we were walking past (which wasn’t true). We hugged and said it was nice meeting each other.
That was Saturday, and it’s now Monday and we have had zero contact. I know its time to make my next move but I have no idea what to do. I’m new in town and don’t know of a whole lot of stuff to do. I don’t want to go to another museum; I want to take this to the next level if that’s even possible. Right now I feel like I didn’t fuck up, but I didn’t excel either. And if I am going to build attraction it has to be now or it’s all screwed.
To make matters worse, I just found out yesterday that an old friend of mine passed away from a drug overdose and it has me in a really wired headspace. I don’t feel like I should be socializing but if I wait too long ill blow it.
She likes snakes and yoga, so I was thinking about texting her and saying:
I bet I can guess your favorite yoga pose.
Her: What?
Me: Cobra
God that’s dumb isn’t it… IDK what to do with myself.
CHAT