Hey guys, this is a bit embarrasing but i've been doing this pickup thing for over a year and a half now and i can safely say that i almost never opened anything (except a couple of tin cans maybe ) ) and anybody.
Sure, i've been going to clubs and danced with girls more times that i can buther counting and sometimes i have a very brief chat with a girl without being able to say that i'm really into the conversation nor do i have any ideea on what the fuck am i doing. Sometimes, when i feel very ballsy or she's turning me on so much that my brain stops functioning properly (which in this case seems very efficient), i go and ask the girl what's her name but that only happened 3 time in my entire clubbing life, and after asking her her name, i'm still clueless on what to do next.
In those 2 times i actually talked to girls in clubs, rather than asking them to dance (this only applies in salsa clubs, in other types of clubs no one really invites anyone to dance), i once asked the girl what's her name, what college does she go to and if she wants to give me her number (she didn't want to implying that she had a boyfriend which was kind of confusing considering she was so into me that even i could tell). I asked her those things after overhearing a collegue explaining his technique to another collegue.
Besides all that, there has been an ebarrasing number of girls interested in me whom which i fucked it up with for the reason of not approaching (many of them being the ones who approached me instead).
The most advanced seduction technique that i discovered so far, and it's actually quite recent, is one where, if i go to a girl (in a salsa club) and ask her to dance, many girls will say they don't know how to dance and refuse you (some of which will just say they don't know just to make you fuck off but most of them just have this self confidence thing where they feel ashamed if they don't dance extremly well, which of course is stupid cuz i don't care if she dances well or not, i just ask her to dance if i feel attracted to her). And i simply say to them "hey, me neither" and 80% of times they change their minds and accept.
This might not sound like a big deal but it took me 6 months to figure out these simple 3 magic words and i just can't tell how many girls i went up to, asked them to dance, told me they don't know, said something to them to convince them to dance and managed.
Anyways, guys, what do you recommend for "approach anxiety" if you will? (even though i don't actually feel affraid of talking to a girl, i just don't do it, i don't even think about it, i just don't do it; and obviously i can talk to a girl with no problem, considering i have something to say or something to ask from her, which in this case is obvious to everyone but i can't just go around asking everybody if they wanna sleep with me ).

try to stay away from Fluff conversation that might bore them. They want to know your interesting and have something funny or entertaining to say/do.

Its good that your aren't nervous but it might sound like an experience thing to me. you need to figure out whats holding you back from just breaking the ice and getting in there. I was similiar and this is what I did. Throughout the day just talk to as many women as you can. On the street, at the store, at school, at work, bus stop, etc. And talk to Ugly, cute, weird, fat, skinny, old, intelligent, dumb, young, etc. Just learn about the different personalities and eventually you will see the truth that the approach is more about the unexpected and unknowing response you might get. The unfamiliar behavior they might respond with. Start at the bottom and work your way up.

Good luck. It works 100 percent for me so Im confident if you stick to this you will be okay.

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I think you're probably right. I just wish i had a slight ideea on how to do this "talking" thing. I'm absolutely clueless right now. And it's not that i don't know how to talk to a girl, i can talk with no problem to anybody but when it comes to seductive language, that's a whole different story.
And i have all these ideeas about what to say, and this perfect image of interacting in a seductive way with a girl but in reality, i just don't even realise i'm not doing it, i just come up a couple of hours/days later with the ideeas on how i should have talked/looked/whatever in that moment and the next time: it's all over again as if i have never thought about how to do the seduction ever before. It's like there's this seductive boss inner self that is trapped inside this afc-ish outer self, it's actually quite frustrating.

hmm interesting. So your aware during the conversations that you want to seduce but you just do it wrong? Thats what I understood.

Some tips:

-in mid conversation pretend she has an eyelash and wipe it away with a couple light strokes (like you would rub a baby's face), then continue the conversation see how she responds.

-Try to find a reason or a way to touch her leg/knee if your sitting or lower back/shoulder if your standing. Once again see how she responds. But important to make it discrete and not obvious your trying to touch her. Does she pull away or does she linger the touch.

-Eye contact is big when you seduce. Stare into her soul when you talk but not to hard or long that shes afraid/intimidated of you. The key is finding how into you she is. Even if its a little, with these moves you can increase the attraction.

*Goal is to speak and carry a normal conversation and instead seduce her physically and with body language. Don't seduce with your words right away that shit only works in porn. Her brain will be so confused because she wont know how to read you, in the end she will like that mysterious side of you where she doesnt know if you want to enjoy a good convo or bend her over and fuck her.

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That is a morvoleu piece of advice and i appreciate very much the knowledge given. It's just that wish i knew how to bring out that inner seductive self because knowing these good tips (and i had a couple of ideas on my own both on conversation and body language) is only half the battle (or even less) but i have to apply the skills learned and that's where my big flaw is, getting to do what i learn without having that hesitation when in the moment.

Even if your game is perfect, you can't assure that you are going to succeed, because there are girls that would regret even Brad Pitt, they just don't want.

For statistics, the more girls you approach, the more chances you have to pick up.

Most of times, it doesn't really matter what you talk about, as long as you show good mood and self-confidence. Being natural, spontaneous and explaining things from an emotional point of view can help.

Jo!

I hope you dont mind, that I'm posting in, but it may help both (or even more) of us.

If you want me to delete that post, just give me a short Message and I will.

But:

I'm in the same boat like you are. I dont see my issue in talking to the girl and having a conversation going(sure I need alot of practice, but this is something you can get used to, if your brain doesnt fart the whole time), the main reason I cant hold a conversation that leads into a #close or a KC is, that I dont know how to start it.

Today I was on my way home from work and there was this HB4-5 sitting infront of me, nothing special, but I just wanted to approach her, maybe I get a #close and can get a lay. If not, I would have a new experience in talking and approaching with a HB and would get closer to my weak points in my Game. We had some eye contact and she wanted to hear musik, pulled out her headphones and just "hhhhrr" looked at me and threw them back in her bag.

So, I sat there and the only thing I had in mind is: What should I say, how should I open? What would be cool to say c&f? And I want something more than just a 'Hi, I'm Jessy'. Ok, cool story. So, have a nice day... Like a real AFC... Im struggeling hard, but I want the solution even harder.

I dont know if I get your point here "edithegodfather", just tell me.

That pretty much sums it up for me too, only difference being that i mainly do my thing at night, clubbing. And most of the times i either find some stupid excuse not to say something to the girl whom i think i have the most chances with (even though i have some ideas on what to say) or i just don't have a clue about what to say and i just do "ma thang" which is, go and invite some more gilrs to dance . (again, talking about salsa over here, not sure the same dynamics apply in house/dance clubs)