So i got a big family. 5 kids and I'm the middle child. My two older brothers both got married and both have 2 kids. Whatever... thing is we all live in the same fucking house still. My mom has still all of us including the wives and kids in a one floor house with a basement. I share a room with my younger brother. I'm 23 and i still share a room. As you can tell it's really easy for me to bring girls home and fuck them there.

Ever since i was 18 i always helped my mom a single parent with bills and other things. Shit i've done alot for my family at my age. Now i wasn't the best child so i'm not bragging. I just feel that i gave up alot of my time for the family and instead of focusing on me and getting myself somewhere. I was a pothead unconcerned about my future so yeah the blames on me.

Now I just want to get away from all of them. I'm tired of my family. I'm sick of being there and trying to be what they want me to be. I don't want to burn bridges though by telling them to fuck off. I just want my space apart. I want my own life.

Well i just got back from a weekend vacation with one of my bros and his kids. I did'nt want to go but the wanted me so i didn't want to let them down. Now my mom wants me to go to visit my other brother in the hospital and see his newborn kid. I said no and she started yelling at me that it would be an insult if i didn't go. But i got a class to study for and this weekend getaway ate up enough of my time. It feels like my family obligations are just harassing my attempts to get away and move on with my life.

Are there somethings i just can't blow off though? is it really an insult? Why does my family make me feel guilty for every little time i'm not there for them?