Hello

That's my first post here.


I won't load your brain with too much detail- there's a lot of details as the overall thing is running more than three years now.

In a nutshell there was this girl I met on the net, ultra hot gogo dancer, I met her in person after a while and after some time she started wanting me. I resisted because I did not like to be together with a woman that dressed like this in public and has photos with her naked body on the net- I like to play around if I am alone but once I get together with a woman I want it to be ultra serious, old-school type. I want kids etc.

But then she started wanting me a lot so I broke(unfortunately) and we heavily made out. I told her let's go ***** our brains out, she said she wants a relationship. I told her no unless she deals with her past- remove hot pictures from the web and start dressing and behaving like a human being. Now that I think about it, I was the one to LMR her, weird. She said she would do it, we started fucking.

Then it was revealed that she had tremendous character and psychological problems. Tried to help her, didn't want to help herself- like a vampire, liked to suck energy from other people, afraid to love and be loved, sexually dysfunctional and didn't remove the photos.

So I separated her. Stayed around and didn't stop talking to her as her problems got very serious and I wanted to help- I developed feelings for her as a human being despite not wanting her as my girlfriend. Then as time went by I wanted her back. Then one time I visited her because she was in pain we made out again and then she got cold at a point and she said "I am afraid".

But the following weeks she turned cold, ignoring me, playing indifferent and even was warm to others but showed that she didn't care about me. I didn't know if it was because she wanted me but couldn't satisfy the requirements or because she saw I wanted her again and I was thinking about it.

Then I got pissed and started ignoring her and being indifferent on her and her overall situation. Played cool, with my job and traveling around and having good friends and all that she didn't have and want. Now we are at that point, where we have more than a week to talk because I am ignoring her and she won't make a move to call me. She is waiting for me in SPAM(when she is bad psychologically she cannot talk on the phone) but I'm not logging in there also to avoid her.

The questions are
a) there are huge amounts of sex we didn't do when together and I want to take care of this unfinished business. But somehow "family life" and relationship quickly dropped her libido. She was a groupie before me, went with some pretty famous people but not necessary to reveal their names here. So she can have sex, but apparently she needs drama to do it. Is it possible to make her pay the debts? Is ignoring a good way to start?
b) I am seeing other girls now, trying to get a new one. Is it possible that because recently I was completely into her her thought can interfere in my game? I caught myself really unable to game after my separation.

A stripper/groupie, with emotional problems? Who saw that coming?

Bro, it's just over, there is no 'unfinished business', your just horny and wan to fuck her again.

The quicker you start fucking a new one, the sooner you'll forget this one.

There is no drop in libido bullshit, she is simply no longer attracted to you.

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

OK, moving forward then.

If ya wanna get a girl with LSE.
Be a G and give 'em the D.
Even if you wanna be a daddy.
Keep her around as an FWB.

Bro, you didnt mention what psychological problems she has. But from what you wrote, I know what those problems are with 99% certainty. This ex-gf of yours has BPD(Borderline Personality Disorder). I am a psychology student, I studied this a lot, and I studied it even more when I got a girlfriend who acted almost the same way!!! The first couple of months, the sex was great, doing it several times a day, but then, her libido dropped in an unbelievable way, until we started having dry spells for 2,3 weeks, and sometimes even a month. Dont worry or be concerned, its not you, she is the problem, this girl is very emotionally abnormal. Sex for her is only a tool to get the attention she craves for, and after you showed long-term commitment, you had already supplied the required attention. The only way you can keep getting sex is if you act like a douche. Do not give her too much attention, be mean, then she will keep using sex to try and bring you closer. I already know how you feel bro, when you are there she completely ignores you, but when you disappear for a few days she will call you and tell you she cant live without you. Some of the guys here who are not familiar with BPD might say that is normal women behavior, but you and I and the guys who have been through this know that we are talking about much more extreme behavior than the normal things they`ve seen. The only advice I can give you is forget about her, and forget you ever knew her, because there is no future for you with her, there can never be one, she is just emotionally incapable of making it happen. This kind of people can recover, but it takes a lot of effort, and the chances are small. Dont stay and try to fix her unless you have a strong inner game, and a high self-esteem. Good luck!

This.

But this conflicts with your long-term goals. You're a family man. You have no future with her. Therefore don't waste your time.

Guys thanks a lot. Already I am trying to get another girl, much more healthy this time. If I end up with couple more in the mean time, even better.

Doom many thanks man, nice to hear an opinion of a specialist and even nicer to see that there's someone who was there and can understand the difference from normal female misbehavior. All guys helped but you really made me feel much better. This girl is quite a case, if you like more info for your study I will provide-she is pretty extreme. BPD is not really the case here, she was diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder few months ago but again I disagree, as I lived with her the problem is pure and very, VERY heavy depression. Mania she was not displaying at all when she was with me(as bad as it will sound and please don't misunderstand me, I wish she did). The sex life you had few months after, I had after the first ten days.

Acting like a douche what do you mean? Generally I am acting indifferent now(when we talk I say couple of things and then "I have to go now, I am busy", "I have work to do", "I'm going for training" etc.). It drove her mad the last time and she broke. Now it's more than a week since I told her I will call her to see how she is doing but I am not doing it- I am going out and trying to remember my game, I almost fully lost it the last year.

As for me I didn't expect such an end and I got quite some damage but now I am recovering( I knew she was problematic before we got together but not THAT problematic). I am quite strong and confident and that's how I got her in the first place and I could stick around and try to help this girl but there's absolutely no guarantee she will do her part(which is the most important) and even if she does finally recover I may discover that our values and goals in life are quite different so better look for something closer to me. I may make quite an effort only to realize finally that I was just wasting my time. So next girl and if she asks for me, sex only.

Thanks a lot. Now you'll be asked to help me remember my skills at some time(I hope not...)

Oh, and Hunter_Foxe I laughed a lot with your little poem but please give some help to a newbie with the abbreviations!

LSE = low self esteem
G = Gangsta or Gentleman
D = Dick
FWB = friend with benefits

Thanks, I only got the first.... English is not my mother language. Cheers!

While, I can appreciate Doom's psychoanalysis, and even the 'treat her like dog shit, to get back in her pants' idea.

What always dumbfounds me is the effort we take in a 'broken' girl when there are so many that are not.

Do they have tighter pussies? Better tits? Or do we just enjoy the mind fuck?

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Well everybody has his weaknesses I guess....

Like bugs to a zapper, Certain kinds of men cannot resist wounded birds, otherwise known as needy women.

More secure, intelligent and fuckable women often shake their heads and mourn their dry pussies. They cannot understand why men they would like to date are wrapped up in women with drama galore.
Hunter NAILED it!

_________________
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

????? I am meeting all kinds of beautiful, intelligent and emotionally stabilized women and haven't ever heard of such a complain. Are you exaggerating a bit maybe? If not, if you know any such woman anywhere in southern Europe please let me know(unless you want her for yourself, that is )


As for the broken ones, they are also human beings- it's not too bad that some people care a bit for them as long as they are not brought down in the shithole themselves. Perhaps this time this girl spent with me having her phony world smashed to pieces and finally lost me will make her more capable of properly treating a man in the future. She is already under SPAM. If it happens, I see it positive that some guy will enjoy a beautiful woman that would otherwise sit at home not being able to get up from her bed and enjoy life. Don't forget, you don't know everything about her- there are some good qualities also in the salad. As for me, I got my benefits also from the story. See the whole picture.