Can't Get a First Date



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PostPosted: Tue Jun 04, 2013 1:44 am 
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You really must be doing something wrong if you are that good looking and still can't close. However, there isn't enough information. How old are you for starters. But, given the limited information to go by here are some tips:

(1) Try to not go for the K-close. Seriously, K-closing is pointless, who cares about the K-close. If you turn her down when she obviously wants it, she will only want you more and you can play that to your advantage.

(2) Stay in the set longer, don't just get the number quick and go to the next. Focus on the end of the night and trying to close that day etc. Ask girls if they want to "get out of here" as someone mentioned.

(3) Try returning to a previous target later in the night and see how that goes

(4) Club numbers are notoriously flaky, just the nature of the game, so I wouldn't be that surprised that only 20-30% respond. I don't see much wrong with how you are texting, most likely it is the earlier aspects of your game that are the issues.

Solid advice. Thanks, bro. I'm 22 btw. I think another thing may be that most chicks I approach are college girls around my age. I sometimes find girls like that don't seem cultured or experienced enough to understand how to be picked up.


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 04, 2013 1:33 pm 
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Quote:
Quote:
You really must be doing something wrong if you are that good looking and still can't close. However, there isn't enough information. How old are you for starters. But, given the limited information to go by here are some tips:

(1) Try to not go for the K-close. Seriously, K-closing is pointless, who cares about the K-close. If you turn her down when she obviously wants it, she will only want you more and you can play that to your advantage.

(2) Stay in the set longer, don't just get the number quick and go to the next. Focus on the end of the night and trying to close that day etc. Ask girls if they want to "get out of here" as someone mentioned.

(3) Try returning to a previous target later in the night and see how that goes

(4) Club numbers are notoriously flaky, just the nature of the game, so I wouldn't be that surprised that only 20-30% respond. I don't see much wrong with how you are texting, most likely it is the earlier aspects of your game that are the issues.

Solid advice. Thanks, bro. I'm 22 btw. I think another thing may be that most chicks I approach are college girls around my age. I sometimes find girls like that don't seem cultured or experienced enough to understand how to be picked up.
Cool. Yea, I think my advice will help you out w/college chicks, especially 1 and 2.

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PostPosted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 10:37 pm 
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Broke the drought last night. Thanks for the advice, gentlemen.


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PostPosted: Sat Jun 08, 2013 10:56 pm 
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Mate im the same man, ive number and k-closed loads of birds but none of them have followed through with a first date.

They always seem to pull out and i dont get it!

But i got an email from style a few days ago explaining about how the game has changed slightly due to social media.

Your text game could change a little!

this might help: http://www.neilstrauss.com/rules/InnerC ... lement.pdf


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PostPosted: Tue Jun 11, 2013 9:36 am 
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Thanks, that texting guide is legit.

I have a somewhat new problem now, fellas. A little unrelated to my original problem. But it seems that it's been so long since I've F-closed anything that my D is broked. I got physical with a HB8 last night, and everything was going swell till my little D wouldn't come up to say hi. Needless to say, the night was a little ruined. This ever happened to anyone after a dry spell? Note: I've also been on NoFap for the past 11 days.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 12:56 am 
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So it really does seem like you're going for quantity and not quality.

There could be several factors at play here and you must figure out for yourself what it is.

1) You are not building enough attraction - i.e you are needy/validation seeking and not just giving out value. If you go for the number here then the girl might give it to you just to get rid of you. What you want here is that the girl is both attracted and compliant, however you want to not care about any of that. How do you do this? You first build your momentum and you get to your state of not giving a fuck and just have fun with the girl. This is where you can apply techniques like teasing, cocky funny, false disqualification, roleplaying, qualifying, etc. since it is coming out of a place of non-neediness and just being a fucking cool dude who does what he wants. This is the point where you gor for what you want unapologetically, whatever that may be and know what to do in certain situations because of pickup. The main point here being that you do not give a fuck and are just excreting value out of every hole in your body because it's fun.


2) She is not INVESTED in you. You must get her to INVEST in you. How do you do so? You reward her good behavior and punish her bad behavior. If she wants more of the awesome cool dude described above make her work for it. Get her to invest in you through the following: Time, money, emotion, sex. If she invests time in you, she feels like she knows you longer. All you have to do here is spend time with her and maybe bounce around the place so it feels like you two are spending a lot of time together. Money - you can ask her to buy you drinks - this is done through building compliance and building her buying temperature, i.e her attraction, through point 1. You build her attraction, buying temperature and compliance and you can ask her to buy you shit, like drinks, or go get you drinks with your money while you stay here. Emotion - the best out of all of them, get her to invest in you emotionally. Make her open up to you. Build a connection with her. Ask deeper questions once you know there is attraction. "If you could wake up anywhere, where would it be?" "What's the most adventurous thing you've ever done?" "You like parachuting? What exactly do you like about it? How does it make you feel?" You basically want those same emotions she feels in parachuting to come up while she is explaining it to you. She also invests emotionally when you two are flirting with each other, but this is positive superficial emotions that can be easily forgotten the next day since it happens quite often, but she doesn't open up to everyone she knows. So find good questions to ask her, find stories about your own personal life to tell and share and get her to share with you. You want her to reciprocate. The biggest investment on her part is sex. Once that is done, it is mostly game over for her because you've just penetrated her and guess what, it's the biggest form of emotional investment she can give.

3) Building a connection - basically what I said above about investing, but this also includes finding commonalities and gaining her trust. In effect this is where you calm everything down and get a little more serious, finding out her true passions in life. Yes she is investing here emotionally, and basically all of this is now emotional investment (plus time since she needs to spend time to be with you).

4) Her friends fuck you over - Sometimes she likes you but the friends don't and talk her out of seeing you. You want the opposite to happen. This is why winning over her friends is such a good tool. Yes in the moment it may not mean much to get the approval of friends, but in the long run it might and so it is always in your better interest to actually win the over, or at least get them to like you in some way or another. Like this the worst they can say is "Yeah, he was OK." This is enough a lot of the times for the girl to make up her own mind. The girl might actually want her friends to say "Yeah he was a cool dude, you should meet him" just to reinforce her own opinion, but if the friends say the opposite then she will most likely listen to her friends since she knows them longer and trusts them more than you, some random dude she spent a couple hours with at the bar. Many of those out there...

5) You are fucking over your text game - You may be doing everything right, as in you are non-needy in the bar, a cool dude whom she also invests in, the friends love you, but if you suddenly step out of that frame via text then you are incongruent and you are fucked. Why is this? Because she liked the guy at the bar, and if you are not the guy from the bar in your texts but suddenly this niceguy sensitive kid, then she's not going to like it. Sometimes she won't mind because she's still in a haze of how much she liked/s you, but sometimes she changes her mind. Sometimes she's just on the fence and your text game could be the thing that makes or breaks it. If you are too needy via your texts, i.e sending too many texts, investing in texts more than she is investing, being needy in the content of your text and not fun and pushing towards a date (what you want, you have to go for it unapologetically) then she might just not want to meet you again because all it took was that you remain cool, and she may even shit test you and you have to just remain cool and keep an abundance mentality. If you don't and you go into scarcity mentality because you think "Yes! This girl liked me and I liked her, it has to happen!" then your texts will show that. Rather see this number as one of many. It seems you are doing so anyway since you are getting quite a lot of numbers. So I think your sticking point may be in one of the four points above.


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PostPosted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 1:12 am 
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If you'd like, you can voice-record some of your number closes, then post the texting transcript right after and tell us if it was successful or not- I think that would be the best way to diagnose the issues that you're having.

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PostPosted: Wed Jun 12, 2013 7:32 pm 
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Thanks, that texting guide is legit.

I have a somewhat new problem now, fellas. A little unrelated to my original problem. But it seems that it's been so long since I've F-closed anything that my D is broked. I got physical with a HB8 last night, and everything was going swell till my little D wouldn't come up to say hi. Needless to say, the night was a little ruined. This ever happened to anyone after a dry spell? Note: I've also been on NoFap for the past 11 days.
it happens bro, you were nervous, drank to much, whatever. At 22 years old i HIGHLY doubt anything is wrong with you, it was just mental.

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PostPosted: Mon Jun 17, 2013 12:59 pm 
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Thanks for all the responses, guys. The past two weeks, I've been applying some of the lessons. I've managed to find not one but TWO hook-up buddies in that time. I think one of the biggest things to be successful at PU is legitimately not caring too much. Just have enough confidence to back up whatever you say and do. Going to start amping up the nights out again. Thanks, gentlemen.


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