Hi guys, Iv been on the board a few years but forgot my previous Username etc. Anyways Been in a relationship 3 years now, Always been a great relationship and rarely argue, However now im thinking it could all be over so quickly!

I said that we rarely argue but when we did it was always after a night out with Alcohol involved, She has accused me of lacking Intimacy on a night out and tryint to act all Bachelor while being with her still, I admit maybe I have been a bit like that but I have not cheated or anything of that nature, But this is where the major curveball comes in this past weekend that now has me questioning the whole relationship now..

I had my end of season Basketball awards, while we were there she accused me of not being intimate and what not, I was just trying to keep the conversation going with everyone and trying to make everyone happy,
When we get to the City Centre bars she spots me talking to a girl I went to High School with (i only said a few words if that) and hits the Red mist, asking me who it is etc. She really looked like she was going to confront the Girl and embarrass herself and me so i try to difuse the situation by telling her name and that she had left the club (she hadn't) she was still angry and accused me of lying, Next day I get a text saying she will bring my things over, that night we kinda patched things over however she got a friend request from a Guy on Facebook, She accepted and about 10 minutes later he liked her photos, After this I noticed that the night before when she was angry she deleted her relationship status and photos with me from there so there was no existence of a Boyfriend, I kinda let that go for peace sakes but yesterday I went to the toilet came back and caught her checking his profile, That was a major Red flag to me, she must obviously be kinda interested to look right?

Anyways we kinda carry on with the day but the feeling is kinda weird, I get the impression she is trying to get out of the relationship now which is maybe not true, But I don't know it's a strange feeling, She then says 'You know i Love you dont you, I just dont want you to be sad' Im like what does that mean and she states that she 'just doesnt want me to be sad'

What you guys think? You think this is the beginning of the end?

Dude, I think that she simply wants more attention from you, and since she is not getting it, she is playing games with you to get it. Now you have done a good job so far by not giving her all the attention she wants, remember you have to keep her wanting for more, and that she will go distant if you give her more attention than she wants. I think her looking at the guy`s profile while you were coming back from the bathroom is no surprise, she was trying to make you jealous, another one of her games. She doesnt want to break up, I can tell you that almost certainly, but she is playing too many games, you need to punish her a bit. Become a bit distant, less available, and even less intimate, then she will cave in and stop playing the bullshit games. Remember, "you have to be willing to risk loosing her if you want to keep her!

Yeah you make sense man, I will look to do that and see what happens

3 year relationship, this has its risk. During this first year this surely sounds like something you do, but 3rd or 4th year, you could be risking pushing her further away. The sometimes 2nd year, definitely 3rd or 4th year in a relationship the woman is thinking bout where this relationship is at and where does it need to go. Most women decide at this point rather they want either a deeper commitment or to move on cause she doesnt see a future. Her tell you that "She has accused me of lacking Intimacy on a night out and tryint to act all Bachelor while being with her still", she wanted a deeper commitment. If you are out at night, she wants affection in public; holding hands, kissing, closeness etc....The showing to everyone that you are want her.

But now that you have not shown the extra intimacy that she was looking for, she might be thinking bout moving on cause she wants to find someone that wants to settle down with her. The reason i say this is because she said "You know i Love you dont you, I just dont want you to be sad". Seems like if you want to keep this girl longer term, you might consider dropping your pride a little bit and showing her the affection and commitment she wants or she will be gone by the end of summer.

I respectfully disagree with this. The OP is really doing NOTHING wrong his girlfriend is the one whose constantly trying to find fault with him and then becomes a hypocrite and does something that if the OP did it she'd go crazy. I get the feeling that this girl is into drama or is just getting bored with the relationship (trying to pick fights over nothing, the club thing shows immaturity). I have a feeling that the OP and his gf are young and she's getting restless being tied down for so long. My only advice to the OP is to really evaluate this relationship and see if its worth it to constantly go beta for this girl.

No problem with disagreely, but i say this because his description of her behave is very similiar to the way women react and discuss bout reacting after a LDR and she is at the point that "decide at this point rather they want either a deeper commitment or to move on cause she doesnt see a future." There is several women forums online just like this one that discusses this stuff and the book/movie "Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man" which alot of women that read the book agree with.

Clearly she feels you're pulling away if we take her comments at face value (you're acting like a bachelor...basically single), so the weird vibe you're getting makes total sense. Would you be close and vulnerable with somebody you thought may be on their way out of the relationship? No, instead you'd erect a wall and begin removing yourself emotionally in preperation for what you believe is the inevitable, the breakup. She's protecting herself.


You're both not getting what you want in the relationship and on top of it the attachment is under duress.
Time for an genuine talk with her. 1) she tells you she wants out but doesn't want to hurt you (better now than down the road), or 2) she agrees she wants to work on things and now you two can work toward being on the same page and working through this.

Lots of bad advice here. She just wants more attention, and if you give it to her because of this kind of behavior, it'll only get worse. When she's affectionate with you, be affectionate back. Don't shut down her advances. However when she's acting whiny and trying to make you jealous, do NOT feed the troll. It will teach her that her behavior is ok, and it will get worse. I give you my guarantee. Call her out on her bullshit and don't be afraid of being harsh (verbally of course).