5 year relationship crashed and burned, need assistance.



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PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 6:09 am 
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Hey, after being a lurker for six months when all this started i had an unusual turnaround and i could use your help.

girlfriend
We had a serious relationship for five years sadly over distance for the biggest part. Army enlistment for nine months was the last thing that was holding us apart but my getaway to move to her city (it's a big city compared to mine so i wanted to go there it was not just for her). i even made some calls to be in an army case just ten minutes from her house. over the last year work took it's toll on me and i post of neglected things like my appearance. she was the sweetest and most sensitive girl and i loved her for that because she actually appreciated what i was doing for her. last thing i did was buy for us her favorite dog which sadly was our downfall in the end.

situation
So i join the army actually in my birthday in November and i in panic mode the first five days because i feel lonely and need her support. i overdid it and called a LOT which became tiresome. she net a 35 year old guy and they hang out a lot walking his dog with mine. i got furious and talked to her badly on the phone and next day she said she has no feelings for me anymore after i talked to her like that. i went even more panic mode and to keep things short i did everything i could to ruin things more. i lied i called i lost eight kilos i was a wreck. i saw in her Facebook messages that they kissed and then when i transfered camps i broke up with her and deleted her from everywhere in my life. Twenty more days of of lying and trying to get her with the wrong way back ensued and then i read the game from style and i started my ascendancy. until three days ago i enforced total no contact.

So i met her for her birthday so i could walk my beloved dog. The guy she cheated me for dumped her after just one month. now i know she dates some other guy. she didn't like my new pua style necklace and belt thought i told her i don't give a fark and said she thinks about us but is afraid i have changed too much. deep inside I'm the same when in a relationship. my inner game is vastly improved though I'm not an afc anymore though i have loads of stuff to learn. so my question is. IF and i stress the if decide i want to try and get her back how should i game her? i even thought of using the October man. my game is solid and I've been with double digits after we broke up so it's not that i can't get new girls. i did like what we had. i need advice if i decide to game her please :)

sorry about any mistakes or punctuation I'm typing from my phone.

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 4:41 pm 
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Joined: Tue Feb 21, 2012 3:50 pm
Posts: 587
At this stage, if she's a good girl and you are not just trying to get laid, I'd go direct.

Tell her you have changed. You acted like an immature pussy, you know it, you didn't like it, so you've decided not to act like that anymore if you can help it. Tell her you liked what you had. You'd like to start over. Kino while doing this would be helpful. If she agrees, start with something light, not serious, not dramatic for dates. Create a new relationship, don't try to resurrect your old one. And prepare yourself for the outcome that she says she doesn't want to try again with you. Keep your composure and tell her you understand, and that you couldn't get what you wanted without asking for it. If you get that answer, when the conversation is over, go NC and get on with your life. The reason it's so critical to handle the rejection well is because she is saying no NOW. That doesn't mean she will feel differently a month from now, or a week from now. Just handle it well and get on with your life. When she comes around and has a change of heart, if you're not with someone else at the time, you can decide then if you want something with her yet. Keep all that in mind.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 5:16 pm 
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Joined: Thu Feb 07, 2013 5:59 am
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Thanks for the input :) she didn't close any doors but nothing more happened. actually I'm glad i didn't give a fark all this inner game stuff has paid off! i need some contact with her though because i want to see my dog :)

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You want to see how it feels to live in a student town in sweden? http://kostasgoesabroad.blogspot.gr/

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PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 5:32 pm 
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Joined: Tue Sep 18, 2012 8:24 pm
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Location: Nottingham, UK
Actions speak louder than words. Telling her you've changed is less powerful than allowing her to find out you've changed.

Isolate, escalate and fuck. Once you've fucked her all her feelings for you will come back.


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PostPosted: Wed Apr 24, 2013 9:08 pm 
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Joined: Thu Apr 21, 2011 3:55 pm
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Location: MD
Quote:
Actions speak louder than words. Telling her you've changed is less powerful than allowing her to find out you've changed.

Isolate, escalate and fuck. Once you've fucked her all her feelings for you will come back.
THIS


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