I did some haphazard searching of the forum and didn't found too much on this topic. So I've been on two lunch dates with this girl now and I have another set up with a different girl three days from now. Only problem is, I'm very quickly realizing how difficult it is to kino a girl who is across the table from you. Are there any simple ways around this? I know there are things you can do with your hands (palm reading and the like), but it seems there are few opportunities for escalating the kino to anything more than that. And the problem is made even worse by the fact that you're in public, so she might feel uncomfortable. Should lunch dates be avoided altogether? I feel like this is the biggest AFC question ever, but I want others to learn from my mistakes. I feel a wave of friendzone coming from this girl.

-S'Dudley

Next time you date her, don't take her to a restaurant with a table between you. Go on a picnic (doesn't matter where, it could be some relatively secluded place on campus, or in a park a little bit away from people, but not too far, so she doesn't get worried). Bring something fun and memorable to eat/drink, a picnic blanket, music (iPod with speakers). When you get there, say something like "this spot right here in the friendzone... you're so cute I've decided to put you there" so she's forced to say she doesn't want to get friendzoned. Respond by saying "Ok, just don't get any ideas just because you've got me alone... I'm kind of worried you'll make me lost my virginity or something..." She should be laughing by this time.

You have several options after you've broken the ice a bit:

• You can do the hand-reading thing, and tell her to come sit next to you to do it... if she sits too far away, say "Scoot over, I can't do it when you're way over there." Cradle her hand in yours, stroke it to relax it. do your reading, with an initial focus on her emotional/love life, then you can tease her about mildly scandalous things you "read" in her palm, like "I see that you had a crush on your 12th grade math teacher... what was so sexy about a 50 year old guy with thick glasses?" or something like that. Proceed with kino as follows: when you lead her into conversation and aren't paying attention to her hand, lay her hand down, in yours, on her thigh. Then, when you return your attention to her hand, leave it on her thigh, lean into her shoulder a little, let your head get a little closer to hers, then say "And look at this" pointing to something on her hand with your free hand... get her attention off the fact that you're kinoing her, and let her get comfortable with your physical touch. Proceed from there, a kiss should be easy.
• Create a dance playlist on your iPod. Start with a fun song that you can shake your booty to, then a song you can turn her to a couple times (she loves to be turned, it shows you're in control) and then a slower song, where you can take her into your arms and get her used to being clasped in your arms. Nothing sexual, keep appropriate body distance... you just want her to get used to your touch. Watch a few social-dance videos if you want some inspiration... don't worry about being fancy, the girl will be caring much more about you and where you're taking her than whether you're a dance master. Just be sure you can set a basic rhythm, then talk to her while you dance, maybe making fun of the fact that you can't really dance, or teasing her about stepping on your feet. Then, you can proceed to making a date for dancing at night, she should be ready to say yes by this point.

Try these and see how they work, and report back.

~50

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--== I'm just learning this stuff too, so take everything I say with a grain of salt and follow your intuition ==--