Feb 10, 2013

Some positive things occurring. A good friend of mine (over 20 years) is now single! We haven't both been single at the same time in well over 15 years. He's always been better at getting the girls but feels like he has approach anxiety. We are going to work together on opening. Only problem is he doesn't seem to like being single and will likely shack up sooner than later.

So the cute mexican restaurant waitress from a couple of posts back.. I haven't been able to catch her there. Last night I went there (she used to work lunch so I'd been going at lunch) and she was there! I immediately pointed at her and asked the hostess to put me in her section. I didn't close her but I think I did well in getting her attention. She ended up buying me a beer so I sat around for a bit after eating. Then my friend showed up and was ready to go out so I had to leave sooner than I preferred. Problem is there is this absolutely beautiftul Mexican girl working there and I was busy flirting with her as well. So I shall keep going there and I promise to close on one or more next time. I hate saying 'next time' but there just wasn't a good opportunity for me to get any serious talking in with her.

Afterwards my friend and I ended up at a few clubs. Meeting up with some friends of his, I discovered I am just too shy at times. It took me a good 45 mins to warm up to everyone in the group. All had good common ground material to talk about once we started talking. I've got a starting point to work on with my approaches I can see... just internally in my own social circles! I did better for the rest of the night, although I didn't make any approaches. I did however meet a girl who was a friend of a friend of a friend. A wild one indeed but not really my kind of HB but then again.. no real connection but I think I know where to find her later this week.

March 20, 2013

Wow over five weeks since the previous update! I have been incredibly busy with work. I'm feeling overwhelmed running a business. Now I've hired an employee. Even more paperwork. Tax season. Not much energy left over for sarging but I'll get to that in a minute.

1> Still haven't been able to catch the beer buying waitress working. I don't get there much. Decent food but my third favorite Mexican place so... however my newly single friend and I went there this week and there is a new waitress. She wasn't flirty at all and I didn't do anything different than my normal interaction with cute ones. You know how I swore them off and all.....

2> The girl from work is still on the radar but we've kind of fallen into this flirting text game. Saw her today in person and talked with her a bit. Just don't think there is much there coming from her side besides friendly flirting. I have other reasons to walk away but she stays in my head too much. Recently I asked her outright what the relationship was with the 'friend' and she said he is her official boyfriend now. I think it was more of a cover story personally.

3> My newly single friend and I have decided we are out of shape. We weighed in and measured up, and have put my home gym to use. Starting out rather light at two days per week so we don't burn out. We've been going out to a few clubs but no sarging yet. I've been talking to him about PUA and the sarging games (cash back per approach). He is a strong closer but hard to get him to open. I don't think I've got good game start, mid or close but mid is my strongest point. I think I could be a good opener, but see point 4.

4> WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME? I think it is because of my #2 close being around a lot and available. I pick apart every set and rarely see an HB 'cute enough' to open. My reasoning is I'm not going to step down to a lower quality HB. Only UP. My #2 goes to the same club and often brings along a couple of HB7/8 types that are very friendly with me. I get some good dance positions and I notice the other HB's really take notice when you've got two dancing with/against you. But then it becomes difficult to open those HBs because of the obvious risk of losing #2 since she's watching.

5> Another waitress (this one is an LPN studying to be RN). This one is young, 25 and has a kid that is 6. Asian. Short. Very pretty girl though. I've known her for years in going there with my ex wife. We never talked beyond very friendly topics with the wife involved. I brought an HB there a while back. Today it was late lunch and quiet. She kept trying to refill my drink every few minutes and I took the cue to talk it up. I noticed her ring finger was naked. I didn't mention that but we discussed work, family, my divorce etc. When told her my wife was gone she inquired about the HB from a couple of months ago. I found that interesting that she noticed, I think an IOI. As I was inhaling to ask her for a close (number, FB whatever) my phone rang for the millionth time (work - the very subject that got us talking). This call from a VP, had to take it. Long call and it took the wind out of the conversation. On my way out we traded names, but I'll have to return to get a close.

6> My #1 close is flaking. Not to me specifically but going through a rough patch in life. Totally unreliable right now. I feel very vulnerable as I have no other options now besides #2. I need at least 8 or 15! Hoping this work out thing holds together and helps energize us and our confidence to do some sarging. Will try to keep this updated a bit more often.

March 28, 2013 -

Interesting week..

1> Haven't been back to see the LPN/waitress

2> A new girl was starting at one of my client's locations. I am directly involved with new-hires (after they get hired) and get some seat time with most of them. This girl was bangin', solid HB8 with HB10 (big) boobs . Nice flat stomach. I knew immediately this girl and I had something going. I felt very relaxed but spoke rather carefully as I got her story. Single (sorta recently out of an engagement), 24, no kids and doesn't want any.

So after some good talking for about 30 minutes I had to go take care of other work. I felt bad to get up without her number but I figured I'd let things work out how they may. As I left her office I turned around and told her she was very cute and lots of guys from there will be hitting on her.

Sitting away from her my mind started running in high gear. Just in the thirty minutes I was with her, two guys that work there were lurking and being flirty. I had no time to burn. I formed my plan an executed it about 20 minutes later:

I went to her office, tore off a page from the notepad and grabbed a pen. I firmly placed both right in front of her with a bit of a slam. Before I said a word she was already smiling and reaching for the pen. I said 'Now I'm hitting on you' and walked off. About half an hour later I got back to her office to finish up. She immediately grabbed the note and handed it to me with her number on it.

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IOI's were flying. She kept leaning over me to get to things in her desk. I touched her hair and shook her hands twice during the initial meeting. Hard to explain but it just 'felt' right with her. Good stuff.

Today is day two. I saw her this morning for a few minutes, where I teased her about a (her) car being parked in the visitor spots instead of employee parking. I told her someone had parked there but not to worry about it - I'd let security know about it so they could get it towed. LOL. After I left I called (work number) and told her she looked even better today. Also I hadn't called her number yesterday because of my #2 being around. Told her that I am really busy this week with work and a friend from out of town, but that I want to hang out with her soon. She said any time.

So we shall see where it goes. No matter what, this is already a 100% success. I went in total alpha/confidence mode with that number close. No sissy asking or hoping. Just an absolute expectation that she will fulfill her duty to write down her number on that paper.

24 yikes.. that's lower than I said I'd go, but they sure are pretty at that age!

3> My number 1 is suddenly pushing for some hangout time. She has lost her position at the top because she was being unreliable/flaky. She's not even good as a backup because of this, but she makes a good backup to the backup! Haven't closed her in a long while now. About due for it though.

Though your ultimate goal is a relationship, i hope when you pick up you don't project and are into this as a way to prove the ex wrong(revenge mindset), Anyways if you have not fuck 50-100 girls i would not get into a relationship. Also learn about relationship this is the best of relationship from the top players:

http://www.pua-zone.com/showthread.php? ... -old-forum

_________________
Learn the proper way to maximize your results in a dancefloor/club environment, check out my blog and youtube channel:
http://www.dancefloorseduction.com

Dancefloor/Club game youtube channel:
http://www.youtube.com/dancefloorseduction

Thanks for the link. I'm definitely not in revenge mode. The truth is I don't know what I want right now. I don't foresee marriage anywhere down the road. Things are just too messed up in society these days and divorce gets expensive/ugly. I do like relationships though. It's just nice to be able to get out if things go sour and not have to deal with attorneys to do so! So for now my mindset is meet HB's and hang out with the cool ones. If something goes into LTR that's fine. Someone just stop me if I start mentioning the M word in the future!

After reviewing the material in the links, I can see a few things I've done to get myself into a corner with #2. I'm glad I read the info on soft-nexting. I haven't seen that in a while and forgot the concept and have only been thinking about how to hard-next her.

I've definitely put myself in a one-itus position without specifically wanting to be there. I've already started the process of backing off. For one thing, the possibility of an opportunity with the 24 year old has me wanting some breathing room. Also #2 is just becoming annoying with her LTR mentions and also just her physical behaviour. She is madly in love with me. She touches me and rubs me constantly until it hurts. You know the kind of touching I'm talking about. Hand holding etc. Definitely time to soft-next this one. Not to mention she is crowding me and I need room for possible interaction with the 24 year old!

I told #2 to not come around saturday night. She complied willingly and ended up having to work 16 hours anyway. I was hoping to hear back from the 24 so I could invite her to the boat to hang out. Still hasn't texted me back after our little friday evening texting session. Because #2 was with me (in bed and naked at the time!) my responses were slow and relatively short. This might have made her throw up a block of her own. We shall see.

I've mentally nexted the 24 already. Not sure if I should give her the benefit of the doubt or just next her. Not used to dealing with these 20 somethings in a long time!

Ironicaly #1 is coming out of her shell again. She is wanting to get together next Fri night for some romping. I need at least seven more backup plans though. I'm very happy to have learned about PUA though. Some years ago I wouldn't have considered working these other deals while I was in a deal. I had the AFC experience.. lonely, sad nights when a block was thrown up. #1 is the worst type from my past, but since she has been relegated to FWB she has become very useful. I don't mind her blocks when she's throwing them. When she's in a playful mood it's great. Win win.

Man this is an awesome thread, detailed and well written. It is clear that you are not one of the kids that are mostly around here, it would be even if you didn´t state your age at the beginning and I dig that very much. It´s no surprise I guess that I can relate to you, since we are roughly the same age and veterans of a long relationship (mine lasted 10 years and produced 2 beautiful sons, however I wasn´t married to the babymom ). I actually never was bad with women but could have been much better if I would have been braver and more aware of the impression I made on girls. I sometimes regret that I didn´t discover PU earlier, but then during the past year since I did discover it I realized that the sheer life experience of 4 decades puts me way ahead of the youngsters that started PU a year ago like me. I believe you might agree...
I wish I had the stamina to document my journey in as much detail as you did on such a regular basis. For monitoring my own advances just as being helpful for others. But I get lazy, today I submited my first post since many months (you might want to check it out I called it I BELIEVE THIS WAS TEXTBOOK GAME also in the field report section), but since I´m a freelance author and pen for hire (in german though lol) I write so much during the day that I can rarely be assed to spend my free time writing reports ...

Anyway, the last year has been the best time of my life so far and I´ve come a long way. I hope you don´t mind me giving you my general opinion on some of the many topics you mention in your great posts...

The age-thing... you say that being 41 is always in the back of your head. Well same with me, actually it´s often my main reason to hesitate approaching. Fact is that there is a certain percentage of younger women that will rule out dating you because they think you are too "old". But most of these girls think that way because they are simply still little immature girls in their heads, that unconciously perceive themselves as kids, while they perceive us as "grownups" in the way they perceive their mommys and daddys as grownups. Fact is that almost all young women that have truly left puberty behind in psychological terms see us as men, full stop. When we hit on them we actually validate their developing sense of being a "real " woman. I still struggle with this though, I admit Regardless of the fact that 70% of the chicks I f-closed, k-closed or whatever-closed during the past year have been younger then 30, regardless of knowing that I don´t look like 43 (most people estimate I might be in my mid 30s - the younger the girls the younger they think I am, which is interesting). But as I said it´s something I really have to put behind me

The other thing that strikes me is that I personally think you aren´t aggressive enough. In the sense that I believe you could escalate much more in most of your interactions that you describe. You seem to do damn well with the ladies most of the time, getting loads of IOIs and the likes. Still I keep reading the words "next time" way to often for my taste! Well, you say yourself that you hate writing them, so you are obviously aware of the problem. Don´t get me wrong, patience is good, having the ability to stay cool and wait for the right time to make your move. However you should maybe work on identifying that moment, cause I believe you missed a few good opportunities here and there! And even if you misjudge the situation and strike too early? So what? It´s like many guys being afraid to go for a kiss even though everything has played out perfectly during an interaction because they are afraid they might creep the girl out, ruin the whole thing. I found out that it´s true what PU teaches us: Even if your attembt to close (kiss, number fuck doesn´t matter) it will still give you higher value with the girl if you display the boldness to go for it. You show that you have balls and that you know what you want! Your chances to succeed will almost always be better when you home in for the kill the next time, because women respect boldness and determination. The key, I found out, to not getting blown out for good after a failed attempt to close, is to maintain your frame and not get irritated. If you go for a kiss and the girl turns away jsut stay close to her face give her a big smile and back off after a couple of seconds. Let her feel that you are playing a game with her and that you´re enjoying yourself doing that, no matter what the outcome might be. You´ll see, that if there is attraction she´ll let you close her when you try the next time. It sure works for me!

Oh, and one more thing: Don´t hold back on gaming women you fancy just because you have an HB with you! You should actually cherish and utilize the preselection that comes with being accompanied by a hot chick. It actually works both ways, on the chicks you game AND on your date! Especially when your date is not your LTR but a fuckbuddy, like your #2

Keep up the good work man and keep posting! I enjoyed reading this immensly (read the entire thread in one go) and I think you are a great guy! If you should ever have a reason to come to Europe make sure you stop by Cologne! You can crash at my condo any time and I´d really enjoy winging up with you!!!

And last but certainly not least: All my best heartfelt wishes for your dear mom, I truly hope her health will be better in the future!

Peace love and respect brother!

Great points Picun. And thank you for the very kind words! I am really working that 'next time' thing right now. My attitude with this 24 yr old is pretty positive no matter what she throws at me. She continues to be very flirty and I'm hoping it is going to 'hang out' close very soon. My biggest obstacle in all of this is #2. She has a lot of time off this week and is only working one night all week. This makes any kind of public date with the 24 risky.

The good news is #2 is working late Friday night, the night when #1 is coming to play. I intend to back #2 down to reality, but she is really a great person and I am trying to make it occur over a span of time. As well, since I enjoy hanging out with her I don't want to put myself out of the game until I have more backup options. I think a little sexual session with #1 will ease my mind in transitioning #2 back to FWB mode.

As for the 24 girl, I saw her today. An AFC about her age was hovering about when I walked in. He must not be getting any work done at all if he has time to stand up front with her. But he is AFC so I don't think a big threat to a close. As I am typing this thread, I am going to call her and firm up a hang out date:

Dialing.. well she was in the middle of something but said she will call me in a few.. Let's see how this turns out. If she doesn't call back that will be an automatic next. Will update in the next post..

So I have to say that I have been high as a kite all week as a result of the number close. The lesson here is that I just went for it, and I got it. Just that simple. Now as for her HB factor, I think I've moved her to HB 7.5. A slightly nerdy look and a couple of pounds that don't have to be there (explains the amazing boobs) but as a total package it really works well together. In reality the best thing that could happen here is for this whole deal to fade away. If I f-close her and things go south later, it would make work a bit more interesting. Don't need drama around there. In some ways I've got a 100% win right now. It could go to 150% with an f-close and a FWB result. It could go downhill though as well. But I'll take 50% over 0% any day!

Follow up is --> NEXT

No call back.. never answered my text. Tired of games so I deleted the texts and then deleted her number. Next time she texts I will ask who this is and she can start from the bottom of the ladder.

I wouldn´t do that bro! If she texts you after all (I´m sure you´ll recognize her, even though you deleted her number), you should react just as flirty and nice as you should when you see her again. Don´t give her no attitude whatsoever in texting , or real life. Remain just the way you were You are the man, your frame is that you like to flirt with , and possibly fuck, this cute little girl, full stop. She didn´t answer? Who gives a fuck? Certainly not you! You are just having fun with her and keep doing so. You might lay her after all, cause women like a man that won´t get irritated by their behaviour and maintain their frame! And your frame is playfulness! You don´t feel like playing games? Are you kidding? This IS the game! And it is You who´s running it on her!

I have figured out she is a bit psycho today. I had to work with her a few mins and she commented about how she was keeping to herself today. I asked why and she said she was being a bitch to everyone today and she doesn't know why. She was talking nonsense almost. Also she has a picture on her desk of the guy her FB says she is in a relationship with. This explains the lack of texting when away from work. I was friendly with her today and didn't mention the lack of calls or texting. I am waiting around to see what happens but have mentally nexted.

April 6, 2013

Ughhh.. my week continues to spiral down it seems!

My #1 has proven to be very unreliable for many months now. She slipped into a depression state, which I totally get because of the drawn-out divorce and custody battle coming up. Not to mention being an LSE girl. But recently she perked up and has been wanting to do things with me. I let my guard down and went along with her two week long plan for us to get together last night for a monthly festival next to the marina. We were going to go hunting future mates, drink and be merry and then stay on the boat together. We both looked forward to this all week. Then the flaking started about mid-day yesterday. I'm already down there on my second drink when she messages me that she found out her ex is taking the kid there. I knew it was done at that point (knowing her patterns of behaviour) but I said just come to the boat and we'll hang out there. Downhill from there, and having a drink and a half in my system I just let it all out. I told her I will not tolerate being stood up. There were no legitimate excuses for her not to follow through on our plans. She only lives 1/2 mile away.

Fed up. Done. Sometimes things happen and plans get broken. That is not the case here. She seems to thrive on chaos like this in her life. Not just with me but in everything she does. Plain and simple, this was having a negative impact on my life and I cut out the cancer. I told her we were done. Deleted her and anyone associated with her from facebook.

I really hate burning bridges, but when the bridge is more dangerous than swimming with the crocs I'm not sure it's such a bad idea.

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No more contact with the 24. I haven't been by her office in a few days. When I do stop by I plan to be very nice and just as flirty as ever.

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I'm beginning to enter a state of desperation and I don't like it. Most of my options of have dried up and I'm down to #2. I just had a discussion with her that I'm absolutely not looking to settle down for now. Good to make that clear but one day she will move on. And with no backup plans, it is going to put me in a very bad position. While I am still riding the high of the number close with the 24, I am still not seeing any new options in my current circles. I really need to branch out but I don't have time in my life for new hobbies right now. I really REALLY need a breakthrough soon. Being down to ONE HB option is the instant formula for AFC. Hoping to go out tonight though and maybe something will show up on the radar.

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My friend told me I am being too harsh with these HB's. It is hard from the outside to see the whole story. Personally I don't see anything wrong with Hard Nexting someone who is sucking the life right out of your soul. But I'm posting this and am accepting all criticisms equally!

April 9, 2013

I think I have my head screwed on straight again!


1> I am talking to #1 again. I told her we needed make-up sex. We'll see how that pans out but she is responding ok to the idea.

2> I was able to find the 24's phone number again. Yesterday seemed about right (timewise) to contact her. I made a joke about something going on at work and accused her of causing it to get my attention. She played back and said I hadn't been around so she had to do something to get me over there. I asked if she had gone to the festival. When she said no, I told her I had called some girl her name (implying that I thought it was her) and no wonder she ran off (showing myself as human!). I'm working on some neg's to throw at her when I stop by her office this week. I think she is LSE and needs re-assurance that guys want her even though she has one.

3> Saturday night was AWFUL. I peacocked with a really nice sport coat (more like bad-ass stands out kind) and this actually started out nicely. I had immediate attention but as usual I judged the HB's to be below my requirements. I still haven't gotten past the idea that I can just LJBF them. Just don't want to be cornered by a bunch of chunky HB's that I'm not interested in next time I go to the club. And yes I realize they may have hot friends with them next time. Here is the thing.. an AFC, to get laid, has had to remove certain 'doors' from the hinges. That is how an AFC can stumble into a good lay, but those 'doors' being open makes the AFC vulnerable. He deals with this by avoiding contact with females he has no interest in closing, lest he ends up in the sack with a HB4! I need to put these demons to rest and learn how to open and LJBF HB's that I have no physical interest in.

Oh about the saturday night... I was in a good mood, the peacocking was perfect.. I just got a hair cut and felt good about the way that turned out. I was with my friend who closes plenty. My body language was probably over-confident but it was certainly not beta. I was standing tall and proud with a smile on my face. Work has been amazing lately and I am (currently, probably temporarily) very well funded for once in my life. Yet the night went downhill quickly. I tried to make eye contact with every HB7+ I liked and each one looked away quickly. Now these were all 20-somethings for the most part. But that's what I like.... 25 to 30 and of course I'm 41.

Wrong club? Wrong crowd that night? Or some systemic failure of myself? I looked around at the AFC's and more of them had a gut than not. I was at least average looking physically but probably slightly better than average. Can't tell you that any of the AFC's had any better responses than I did. My friend said we're just starting to look our age and they don't want us. He is quite AFC to be such a closer!

April 12, 2013

I had to drop my truck off at the detailing ship. My #2 was picking me up - waiting outside for me. As I was walking towards the door to leave the building, this HB was standing at the counter by the door. The whole package said HB8.5 or HB9, but I couldn't see her face. As I walked past her, wanting to open but not having anything to work with, she looked over her shoulder and saw me looking. She returned with a nice smile as I pushed the door open to walk out. I said hey but then I was outside. Face brought her to an HB9. A shame. And #2 pulls up about the time, making it hard to turn around. Oh well.. Not sure why but every time I'm with #2, the HB's come crawling out from everywhere.