We're in a relationship. It's been pretty good. Right now, tho', I feel it's not. When we're alone, like yesterday, everything is and feels perfect.

When we're out in public - among our friends, everything is fucked. She acts odd when she tries to initiate conversations or contact with me, and hangs out with her "best buddy" 24/7. He's her only way to 24/7 fun and social grouping, because she's seemingly afraid of me. She hangs out with him all day, literally.

Now - fuck this. We're sickingly caring for eachother, and we both are in love - no doubt. It's just that we're fucking distant every single day because of some fucked up public issues. How should I approach this?

Should I start hugging her in public? Should I constantly smile and be a upbeat? What do I do?

And I've been very little needy. We hang 1 hour - MAX, in total, a day.

What are do you think the public issues are?

Are you afraid of affection in public?

Does she feel like you two do not look good together?

man i just lost someone special to me because i dont know how to open up. ive always been a closed book and i finally meet the right women and i blow it. trust me man you have to show that you have no fear and show how much you care bout her in public ... my biggest mistake!!!! And also how long have yall been together!!!!!

When a woman wants to be seen with a man in public, that usually means that she's marking him as his potential boyfriend. Most people who see both couples holding hands, kissing etc will automatically assume they are boyfriend girlfriend status anyhow in North America. It does not necessarily apply in some parts of Asia btw.

Yours is an interesting case. She likes to be seen with her best buddy (a man I assume) most of the time. Now the question is, is this best buddy a guy or a girl. If it's a girl in guy's clothing (gay), then you're safe. Nothing to worry about, unless you have something against gay or lesbian. Then this will become your problem and her non-association with you.

But I think I may have a simpler answer. She just does not see anything in the future with you and that she does not want to have other people "presume" that you are indeed her boyfriend or potential boyfriend. And that's what she has to contend with explaining whenever one of your or her friends ask her. Is that your boyfriend? Are you guys going out together? Gossip can spread. She's trying to contain gossip by NOT letting this go further.

It sounds like you're doing mostly the chasing. Seemed like the other buddy is being chased by her.

Did you attain this relationship by presumption (you assume she's your girlfriend) or an official seal the deal by her asking and you banter to secure the lead in this relationship? If you presume, then I suppose you now know you made was incorrect. If you guys did the seal the deal and she's shy in public with you and not with her buddy, then there's a fundamental lost of attraction that she no longer sees you as her BF.

Cheers..

I disagree with you. Let me tell you why. First and for all, all good looking girls i know have a so-called "orbiter". A guy who wants to be there for her all the time, also called the best friend. They are ignorant, they think he really wants to be just friends. I assume you guys are a young couple? I had a girlfriend once, who had the most annyoing best friend you could imagine. She came to me then, ooh XYZ gave me a backrub etc. Fuck that shit.

Question yourself, is this the relationship you wanted? Is this a relationship that makes you happy? If not you have to handle.

What worked for me was giving her a choice, tell her she has to drop him or she loses you. You'll know where you stand, you didn't let her play with you like a cat and a mouse.

If she choses him, then you didn't waste your precious time in a relationship that didn't make you happy after all, be prepared for this awnser.

Cheers.