Sarging SOLO?? Need Help!



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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 6:09 am 
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Hey Guys

Relatively new to the whole PUA community, but need advice on sarging by myself...

I happened to accidently go sarging on my own tonight.. I was supposed to pick up a friend (who must have passed out , when I went to pick him up). I was already halfway to the club that we were supposed to go to, so I was like " fuck it, i'll just go solo".. I made some last minute effort to see if any other aquaintences/friends were out, but not much response.. When I arrived at the club, I told myself that if anyone asked I would just say that I was supposed to meet some friends from work that were there/hadn't arrived yet, etc.... unfortunately, when I got inside the club, I suddenly felt insecure and wasn't my usual happy self.. (I wasn't smiling, etc... I bet girls could see it on my face?!).. I took a couple of strolls around, and had one drink at the bar.... I even approached a 2-set (I didn't really think they were hot, though I think they thought they were, but just wanted to practice something!) by the bar and tried the Jealous Girlfriend opener (which didnt get me much interest, prob cuz I took so long to approach.... I should always follow the 3second approach rule)...... I took a couple more strolls and went for a smoke outside where I opened another 2-set which were interested but they were drunk and I found them very obnoxious and so I lost interest very quickly..... after this, due to my lack of confidence/insecurity (due to not having any wingman with me) I left the club.
I was in/out of the place within prob 20 or so mins and it wasn't even 12am. So based on this I've got the following questions:

1. How do I make myself feel secure/comfortable when I'm sarging solo (stories, etc..) because I am thinking of trying this more often, since I'm assuming it could be potentially better than taking a "WEAK" wingman with me?

2. Given that nightclubs/bars can be very LOUD, how are we able to successfully run routines? I mean there is a risk that you will have to repeat yourself given the loud environment, and repeating yourself to a woman could be seen as a DLV?

Any thoughts guys would be greatly appreciated..


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 1:30 pm 
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Just because it's loud, isn't a good excuse not to open. I know what you mean about repeating yourself. You need to practice projecting your voice. A great way to practice is get a voice recorder, stand 10 feet away and run your opener without yelling, and projecting your voice. Secondly, if you have to repeat anything, make them repeat something to keep you on an even playing field. :) Besides around A3 you are going to go for a move to a quieter area of the venue. It only takes about 15 min or so to hit that stage, so you won't have to put up with that stuff long.

How do you make yourself feel more comfortable? A.} Go there more often so that it becomes like a second home to you. That's why Mystery's newbie mission works so well. You get comfortable in those 4 venues you constantly go to. Also you are opening a lot as well.

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 1:39 pm 
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Its just like when you first had to open, the more u sarge solo, the less insecure you'll feel. There is no reason to be insecure, you just have to start believing that. Most of the time the issue of you being alone never gets brought up unless you bring it up on your own.

As far as loud night clubs, you can use how loud it is to an advantage. At some point you can ask your target to step outside so you can hear each other better. Either that or try opening outside of the club where people are smoking. Also, night clubs aren't my first choice in places to hit up, there are plenty of lounges and bars and I find that those places are way better for sarging than a nightclub.


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 3:54 pm 
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Ok thanks for the tips... though what would I be doing on my own at a venue.. (unless I was there to meet someone OR SARGE WOMEN?)... if i'm alone, women may assume that I am solely there to pick them up?.... any thoughts?


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 5:11 pm 
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First off, set your expectations to just meeting new people. Secondly if anyone asks why your alone, "I like meeting new people, and im confident enough not to bring a friend as a fall back."

Treat your anxeity and lack of confidence going in like you would AA. Find something that works for you to help you overcome these feelings.

Also try and make it your goal to walk upto and open the first group you see, regardless of gender/amount of people/etc. This will help break the ice for you, as well as provide social proof for you when you walk in. Literally walk in the door and go open right away.

Hope this helps.

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 6:04 pm 
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Great answer Ka! I couldn't agree more! The other thing to keep in mind is the women that are they went there to meet people or else they would be sitting their butt at home. They can listen to music and drink at home too. They went there whether conciously or unconciously to meet people. It's just that most people have AA and feel socially akward. So when you follow the 3 second rule, and move from set to set around the venue that's why you build so much social proof and look more attractive. Don't worry about it so much, I can just about garauntee the amount of people doing that in that venue you could count on one hand!

You can do it! 8)

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:21 pm 
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Quote:
Ok thanks for the tips... though what would I be doing on my own at a venue.. (unless I was there to meet someone OR SARGE WOMEN?)... if i'm alone, women may assume that I am solely there to pick them up?.... any thoughts?
Carry a cellphone around and act like you're talking to someone if you're getting self conscious.

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PostPosted: Fri Jan 11, 2008 9:23 pm 
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Thanks for the tips guys.. I was actually thinking the exact same thing, if you're sarging solo... you MUST open the first set that you see regardless of anything... I've been reading the Mystery's Handbook and it is mentioned in there aswell.... you're right though I need to figure out how to get over this going in alone thing.... I'm defin going to try it again soon, I've got a wing tonight so I will be feeling "more" comfortable than last night, and am hoping to basically open every set that I see in sight.. will let you guys know how it goes!


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