Dating Girl - Months Ahead LTR Questions



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PostPosted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 5:54 pm 
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Hey guys,

So I just started dating a girl for about week now - about 3 dates under my belt and we certainly have a handful already planned in the weeks ahead. We both work a lot during the week and text throughout the day.

She certainly seems like relationship material and I'm sure she thinks the same but we want to take it slow. She's absolutely amazing - inside and out. I k-closed and kino'ed on date 2 and it continued to escalate further on date 3 so there is certainly good chemistry.

Two questions -

1) At what point do you think it should escalate to a relationship? Do I want for her to ask - as it would show I'm not needy and looking for the "title"?

2) There's a concert in July she's stated that she wants to go to outside of the state. Not sure how to interpret this. I'd love to go to this concert with her but not sure if she was hinting about including me or not. She doesn't have firm plans just stating her wants.
Should I just be outright and say let's book a flight and let's go!
or should I surprise her by getting tickets? or should I just take it easy and take it date by date?

Thoughts appreciated!


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 6:20 pm 
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1) I would wait for her to start asking relationship questions, if she wants it bad enough she will ask. Believe me
2) Take it easy, she'll invite you if she wants you there.

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 6:22 pm 
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Do not
Do not
DO NOT
aaaand ,yeah ,you guessed it
DO NOT surprise her with tickets. By all means just don't. Seriously man,listen to me. Do not do that.


Ok,anyway. You always want the girl to initiate the 'relationship' talk. I never really think about it like that ,ever. With my ex , we saw each other for about 8-12 times and she said something along the lines of:

Her:So...my friends are asking me if we're together.
Me(like a smartass):Yeah,sure,we're in the park,just the two of us,together
Her(*playful punch in the arm*): I mean in a relationship ! What do I tell them ?
Me:Tell them you have to have sex with me first before you can make such an important decision.
Her:Ok,my place or yours ?

Obviously it was all in a joking manner , we didn't have sex or anything until then or immediately after that , but it was a way of teasing her before saying yes. Don't wanna make it easy for her,do we ? :P

I don't really believe that her friends asked , but rather it was her own insecure little way to ask for me exclusivity. Anyway, we were having a real great time together so I went with it.

Quote:
Should I just be outright and say let's book a flight and let's go!
.

Yeah,say something along the lines of:

"A'right,pack your stuff while I book the flight. Also,make some sandwiches"

Gauge her reaction. You're saying this jokingly , so it's safe.

Her:bablabl
You: no no ,I'm serious. Let's do it . (again,jokingly)
Her:balbabal

Just interpret the bla bla . If she says "Stop teasing me ,I'd really love to" or something positive ,then:

You: Ok, come to think of it that actually might be really fun. That's it,we're doing it,seriously now.

And there you have it.

If she seems negative or reluctant , leave out the last part and again , you're perfectly safe because you were just joking around.



Again,DO NOT buy her tickets and try surprises. It's an unnecessary risk.

I bring up my ex again. Every summer she has this super cool concert she 'had plans' to go to. England , Egypt ,Turkey. This girl wanted to go everywhere , but never brought herself up to doing it. She always had all these 'dreams' that she never really worked on accomplishing. So yeah , don't spend you $ foolishly.

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PostPosted: Sun Mar 03, 2013 6:42 pm 
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Awesome advice from the two of you. So my takeaways - no surprises, jokingly gauge her feedback by saying let's go to the concert , and let her bring up the relationship talk. That was my gut-feel by needed to run it by some of the brilliant minds on here


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