Alright, before I tell you my story, I have to admit that I have NO game with women. This is particularly sad since I am at least decent in everything else(in my opinion of course) i.e. looks, sense of humour, intelligence, general confidence, 'qualification'. Even worse, I do not tend to fall into any sort of 'friend' category with girls. Generally there is a degree of sexual tension with most girls I know, and a decent amount of verbal flirting etc. However I have 2 horrendous faults...I am hesitant about physical contact and I have no confidence in going past the attraction stage. Certainly I'm trying to change these...I am now able to share straws/spoons and engage in 'real' hugs, which believe me is quite an accomplishment.

Well anyway I am in dire need of help. I am not sure how this 'HB' scale works, but I am in a flirtatious electronic relationship with a girl who most would consider a 'knockout.' Ive physically met her twice, she was dating a roommate of mine a few years ago for about a week...thats how we met. Suddenly this year she messaged me about needing a place to stay while she interviewed at my Med school. Obviously I agreed. We constantly flirted throughout the day after her interview and later when we met up with some of my friends she would say things like "we just met for a few days but we have a lot in common," and "everyone here is so smart"(after I said something). Later when we got to my place it was dark and I held her hand to guide her through the bumpy pathway to the door. Now the worst part.

After all of that I just completely froze, I didn't know how to move to the next step. When I was getting out my airbed, she even suggested it was 'unneccesary,' and to my utter dismay I heard myself disagreeing and proceeding to fill it with air. I know...pathetic. I had some strange fear...I am a virgin and from our conversations I was pretty sure she is not, even though she is 21 and I'm 23. Anyway that was it, I dropped her of the next day at th airport and watched my dreams fly away. I tried to convince myself it was because I really like her, and wanted to wait in case she got in to the school, but I know it was just because I was a wimp.

Well it looks like I'm going to get a second chance. She is moving to NYC, until school starts next year, and she invited me to drive up and stay with her next weekend. I know its impossible to give me confidence, and I am determined to have that. However if you guys have suggestions how to proceed...what moves to make...how to kiss someone when not drunk(the only times I have real confidence)...how to move from kissing to you kno what...etc. That would be great.

Thanks

wow your lucky, i wish i had oppertunities that easy, anyway you should of just played it off, its better to know you tried to have sex, than to deny it and never know what it feels like, so next time don't hesitate just think its a life or death situation,.......

i used to be like you when i was like 11-14 years old, and i regret it, but you have to change for the better

so what id do is read up on some material ( id recommend juggler's how to be a pickup artist, because you don't have to be aggressive like mystery method, and i don't think learning mystery method is good anyway, to many girls know about it nowdays, at least in my school they do)

and its not that you have no game, its that you were given an oppertunity so bold so fast, and got nervous and didn't accept it( it happens, we're all human, we do dumb things), so just go see her next weekend and play it off cool, act confident ( juggler's ebook has good way to showing value and being confident) and make sure if she offers you it again, take it and have fun, don't be disappointed if she doesn't offer you it though, because you totally just told her no last time....good luck

Haha...I wish I had opportunities like that too(besides this once). Actually this is like the first real opporunity in a long time, since I'm really busy with med school and dont really have time/chances to meet people other than my classmates who are always studying anyway.

Dude, she likes you, she knows your nervous, just come out and tell her the truth - youre a virgin. She will actually like your honesty and she may well be attracted by your innocence. She will happily defile your pure soul LOL Back in the day when I first told an experienced girl I was a virgin she was actually endeared to me!

Youre nervous as hell and its because youve in unchartered waters - we've all been there. And youre nervous coz youre hiding the secret of your lack of experience. Dont hide it, speak to her about it.

You could always just get hammered drunk. OR you could really look into why you are afraid to take physical steps with her. If you are inexperienced with hooking up with a girl the only advice I can give you is to just jump in, thats how it works.

Dude.. I'm no pro but sounds like you still have a great opportunity with this one (I mean she invited you to go see her), unless you guys have had long conversations about "stuff", in which case she could potentially be putting you into that "friends" category.. I don't really know ... I agree with the above post that she may not give you that second chance, but you still have a very good shot at this... just make sure you play it COOL and make NO reference to the previous weekend, if she brings it up, switch topics ASAP. I know where you are at, and given your nervousness, when you go to see her next weekend, I recommend you guys go out for some drinks, its always a good starting point. It will looosen you up, and may give you the courage to make a move under the right circumstances... anyway, just my opinion.. good luck

Thanks for the advice....Yeah I'm definitely not holding out or anything...its not that I didn't want intimate relationships before, but for some reason it was never a major priority...I was way to into school and playing sports, and I kind of missed out. Also I was 2 years younger than my classmates due to skipping some grades when I was a kid, so I always had an excuse(for myself) as to why I was 'behind' my peers...

Now I really feel like its a priority to get somewhere, even if it doesn't happen with this girl. I don't want to assume she was 'asking' for sex...so I don't really feel like I rejected her. And I'm not worried about falling into some kind of 'friend' category...those arent the type of conversations we had at all. I can deal with the other stuff--the flirting etc....and i'm pretty sure I'll get a second chance....I am just a bit apprehensive about 'choosing the moment,' and to be perfectly honest my overall performance, since I don't really know what I am doing. I've made out only twice....both times I was quite drunk so I don't have recollections of the events. I guess I could get drunk again....it might work but then I would have made no progress......I want to clearly remember everything this time.

Sounds like me right now, scared to go out on the edge. Except, in my situation a year ago, I joined her in the bed. But still nothing happened, so it was pointless. I kick ass at the whole flirting thing and all that, but when things get real I get bad. I'm a bit younger than you, but that makes little difference. The only advice I can give is don't go into this weekend with expectations. It seems as though you are putting too much pressure on yourself to get laid, and its messing with your mind to the point where you blank and fuck up. Instead, look at the weekend as a time to have fun with this chick you enjoy spending time with. That way things will be more natural, and when you do get lucky it will feel great.

Good luck, and have fun.

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The hottest ginger you'll ever meet.

I don't have an ego, I just love how awesome I am.

Don't be getting drunk. Be consciously aware of how you feel and what you're thinking the next time the opportunity for sex comes up.

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Venusian Arts
Virgin -> 60+ Girls in 6 Months!