I've been together with this girl for a little more than two months. It's bern great, but in public she's very shy and we act fucked up and distant. We're both 21 and live on the same school, therefore we see eachother everyday - for instance during a meal.

I'm very little needy - I excpect too little, and she might feel i push her away. We act so distant lately i get unsure about my feelings, even though i know we like eachother a lot!!

What to do guys?! How to approach? How to approach this love both in public and alone? I'm unsure and ferl i lose my game due to this distant acting we use on one another.

Please give me tips and guides!

How often do you do things together with just the two of you? How often do you guys have sex (or some sort of sexual activity)? Why do you act distant in public? Frankly, it's your job to lead the relationship. If you stop acting distant in public, then she probably will too.

-Wolf

_________________
Screening: drama-free-relationships-1-screening-vt124827.html
Bad Behavior: drama-free-relationships-3-the-soft-next-vt125554.html

Sex... 3 times as of now. We just started with it. The public thing is getting better.

But how to maintain interest? I feel i lose my game even when we're in private.

When you're in private, just talk to her. Make a point to learn her interests. Ask her about her fantasies. Have a lot more sex. You don't have to run any game.. she already likes you. Now it's just about having fun, so just relax and have fun.

A few tips: Be the leader, make a point to plan dates and cool things you can do together (yes, that's your job). Make sure you maintain an active social life (i.e. have your own friend-group, go out and do active things). Don't act like a jealous boyfriend if/when she talks to other guys. Keep things light and fun. Ect. ect. ect.

-Wolf

_________________
Screening: drama-free-relationships-1-screening-vt124827.html
Bad Behavior: drama-free-relationships-3-the-soft-next-vt125554.html

Thats good enough advice he said it twice. Women are empathetic beings. They are going to pick up on things youre not going to. The public distance might be something youre doing. If you want her closer out in public then make that happen. Dont be clingy...but make it known youre together if you want. If she says back off just playfully back off.

_________________
My personal mantra:

"Every woman's a whore in the right situation"
"They're all selling it for something"
"She's sluttier than you think she is"

Okay, thanks. I'll do my best. As of the leader role, I've been doing that since day 1. I've been taking initiativ from the get to, because she's been shy. However, I feel like shit every time she says she has to go to bed. I feel like I've done something wrong, though I try my best to act cool (kiss her on the cheek and tell her good night, though i did it fast and kinda pushy last night). I think she knows I hate that.

Things feel so unnatural, because I'm scared she no longer likes me. And she's kinda unsure about the sex-thing, and therefore gets both unsure and scared when i initiate sexual contact. The first two months I did this wonderfully, but now I'm scared to scare her. It's fucked.

I need some solid tips, because lately she's been acting strange - we've had little contact due to a school project. Last night was fun and light, though I didn't initiate anything sexual as I wanted to play it cool. We made out a little, watched a movie, listened to music and talked.

We're both 21 by the way.

I'd seriously appreciate some more advice. I feel kinda shit when i'm empty of ideas. I'm also not good at communicating my emotions to her. This might be the reason she's stopped telling me personal things.

I think you worry to much and might be overthinking things. You probably , without even knowing , are pressuring her indirectly.Might be the other way around too. It's the good old vicious circle.

You / her started to worry about something. The other one obviously felt this and started worrying themselves (does she / he not like me anymore ? am I doing something wrong ? blabla ).

So you're worrying because she acts weird because she's worrying because you're acting weird because...you get the point.


One of you has to break this before it breaks you both.You get in these types of situations when you put too much pressure on small things and then it just gets escalated.

Just act as if nothing's wrong. Act like your life is full of rainbows and sunshines. The only possible outcomes are :

1) She sees that nothing's wrong with you and that you're possitive around her. This reassures her and the fear of getting hurt (if she had any) slowly drifts off. She feels more secure with you now and will be more willing to share herself with you.
2) If something is bothering her and yet you appear to be the happiest person you can be , she'll believe that her 'means' of sending you her message (acting distant / whatever she's doing) are not working. At this point she'll feel compelled to actually verbally tell you what the problem is.

_________________
I know my place. It's me on top of the world.

My in depth texting & dating guide.
There's no such thing as shit-tests.
How to keep a girl.

Thank you, my friend! This makes sense. Appreciate It!