so tonight my buddy invited me out to this country themed bar. we went and met up with this who was kind of a natural. he started asking us to talk to chicks, i was nervous, i hadnt dont it yet. so, we start walking around. he starts talking to these girls, me and my buddy wing him and such, no big deal. but when it came to me opening a set i was too fucking nervous. i felt like i was prepared and had no material.

so i was pretty much a wing the whole fucking night because of my social shyness. how lame.

anyway, let me know if you have any good openers or routines. or maybe you have a way of getting over social shyness that might help me out.

thx

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GB

i have the same problem man and i think pretty much everyone does to a certain degree, what i have been doing lately to get over AA is before i walk in to whatever the place may be, i just build myself up in my mind as being unstoppable and tell myself that i'm going to be the life of the party, if you're that guy you won't even have to worry about opening so much anymore because the people will come to you and want to meet you, my goal is usually to get everyone in the place to want to be around me, i do this by making them laugh and also talking about interesting things besides what people normally talk about at a bar or party, it's important not to be a complete clown though i try to balance my funniness and seriousness, because other wise they won't be able to take you seriously haha, it's also good to have an abundance philosophy, which means if something goes wrong with one set you don't hesitate to move on to another because their are usually plenty of other sets to be opened and each one has potential. i hope this was helpful, some of these other guys can probably give you some better more in depth advice, this is just what's been working for me lately

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Capture the imagination first and the heart next. - Style

Golden_Boy

You're not the only person with this fear, infact all of us has had it at one stage and its only natural. Overcoming this fear is not only about willpower but comfort. Ask yourself... why are you fearful of opening? Is it because you are scared of rejection, looking like a clown, failing or all of the above?

Now why should you be scared of opening? Whats the difference if she was to open to you? Would you still be shy?

The brilliant thing about openers is that they give you an excuse to be there talking to your target so you should have no fear at all. Take the "Can I get a female opinion" opener as an example. You're merely there to ask them for an opinion, whats there to reject? Females enjoy voicing their opinions especially to men.

Now as an exercise I'd advise you to go into the field and simply open sets with the opinion opener and make up something short, sweet and simple to ask... get their response... and leave. Do this many times until you build your comfort zone... then you start to chain in other techniques from there.

I hope this helps

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Search knowledge to gain wisdom and understanding

Here's my thing on getting over AA.

On the way to the club, actually every part of day, I make myself chatty with random people.

I chat up the coffee guy about soy Vs. Milk. I chat up the Valet about his day, going to school, etc. I chat up the doormen/bouncers: Hey man how's your day? pretty slow? anything interesting happen?

These are all warm up and makes you simply be, social.

The moment I enter the club, I start opening sets. don't wait, opening builds social proof right away. Go up and do a Warm up opener:

"Hey guys I need the time, my watch broke, it's only right two times out of the day. *smile*"

Do this 3 times to three groups.

My buddies and I, the chief instructor for a Pick up school in LA would make me do these excercises.

He'd say: Dude go get rejected 3 times in a row. and make sure you stay in set and annoy them for 1 minute. If you get rejected and stay in set for a minute, you can keep your $20.

So I basically make it my goal to get rejected, I get annoying, make stupid comments, and just get kinda stalker like. This totally threw my inhibitions away, I was basically showing myself what never never NEVer to do in set. If helped in my case. and at the end I just had this I don't give a rats ass what you think about me attitude.

Hope this helps, any other comments about this would be nice too. Thanks guys.

wow thats genious!!

When i get a car soon im defenitly going to a really far club, and befor ei start sarging il try and get rejected on purpose!

cant wait to try it out!


thanks again

Excellent comment there spider, I do the exact same thing when going mall sarging , first thing I do is go up to a dress shop full with working women. I go with a Large smile on my face and a nice huge "HI" .
then I ask them like a random question "Till when this discount is taking place" + a smile.

then what I do is there is usually music playing along each dress shop so what I do is I start clicking my finger to the song as if Im enjoying it , and when a women looks at me I just look back >>> smile>>> and usually if I know the words to the song I sing-along.

last time I did this , when I was walking away from the shop a girl who was with her brother (HB 4 or less haha) was checking me out and wanted to talk to me badly.

these are just heat-ups for the big showdown , the biggest tip from what I see is become social. and always have that smile to show your having a good time even by yourself and dont need anyone to bring the joy to your front door step.

dudes thanks a lot, these tips are pretty genius, ill give em all a shot.

gracias!

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GB