disinterest right after opening



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A Sticking Point or SP is an issue you CONSISTENTLY run into.

It is NOT a point where you get stuck with ONE SPECIFIC GIRL.

A Sticking Point is:
Quote:
I keep getting LMR whenever I bring girls back to my place. This has happened at least 10 times already! What am I doing wrong?
A Sticking Point is NOT:
Quote:
I got LMR with this one girl! What do I do?
IT IS AGAINST THIS BOARD'S RULES TO POST THREADS ABOUT JUST ONE GIRL
If you have not already gone out and practiced enough to have a real Sticking Point from meeting an ABUNDANCE of women, YOU DO NOT DESERVE TO POST HERE.



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PostPosted: Mon Feb 04, 2013 4:27 am 
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I almost never had a girl first make an eye contact with me before I approach. I usually just approach any set of girls I immediately see. A lot of times I try to act as I will just go pass by them, but as I get a closer range, I jump right into an opener. My openers are usually very high energy and simple. I just say "How are you guys doing tonight?" and usually cheers the girls with my drink. If it's early in the night and I'm not that warmed up, I would fall back to regular questions, which are of great interested to me anyway. If it's later in the night, I start giving less shits and start talking about how awesome the lights are at the bar, or ask them what is their favorite dinosaur or some other stupid shit.

Either way, a lot of times girls get really sarcastic with me and just try to brush me off because they, I would assume, don't find me attractive. When I'm really in the zone, I talk about whatever stupid shit, and they still seem to think that I look desperate or just flat out not interesting. I have tried disqualifiers at the beginning such as "we would never get along, we're too similar" but since there isn't any report or comfort, they would just say "ok". As a matter of fact they would say "ok" to whatever I say a lot of times and I can just see they want me to go away.

Lastly, I think I have really improved on my pasture and just having a smile. A few of my friends told me that I look really confident when I talk to girls. I don't think I come off as creepy so I don't think body language is an issue. And let me add a little info about my keno techniques. I usually lightly brush my hand on my target as I start talking to the girls. I really don't think it comes of unnatural. Maybe like 1 out of 20 girls have called me out on it. lol.

So my question is, how do I get the girls interest within 10 second or so ? What kind of books or techniques can help me with that?


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 04, 2013 1:05 pm 
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Here's the thing, you could look like Brad Pitt and walk up to some girls and they'll still give you a weird look like you have a big pile of dog shit on your head. Some sets just won't open, or will quickly blow you out. And that's fine. It's a numbers game.

You need to realize that most girls are actually routing for you. They want you to be a normal cool guy so they can talk with you and have fun. That being said, they are also waiting for you to prove that you are not normal or uncool, based on the things you say or do. If you come up and just do a boring "Hi, how's it going?" Then they know you are a boring and uncool guy because any lame-o can say that to a girl. If you start talking about dinosaurs, they'll know you are immature or trying to use some pickup gimick--which is another red flag for them.

I opened this one set and it was awkward at first, the girls didn't know why I approached them. It was almost too bold and ambitious and I think they felt threatened, like I was a weirdo or about to do something fucked up. At first they started to clam up and try to blow me out, but then one or two of them eventually realized that I was actually just a really confident guy who was approaching cute girls in public. And they started to play along with whatever witty routine I was using on them.

Your job as a pua is to frame the interaction in a way that will make them respond favorably to you. That's how the opinion opener was born, because women love to give their opinions about stuff, even to strangers. What I would recommend is taking an introspective look at your routine from the girls perspective and try to determine what you can do to make yourself more interesting and appealing to them when you first open your sets.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 04, 2013 4:58 pm 
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I can totally relate when you said that some girls think that you may be a total weirdo and about to do something crazy when you started talking to them. When I do that shit, at least I get somewhat of an successful opening, but usually as I transition to normal topics, they loose me.
Now that I'm thinking about it from girls perspective, I'm actually realizing that it is way harder to get a girl interested right away. If you think about it, if a girl has zero desire to talk to you and is just waiting for a hot guy, I would say about first 10 second what comes out of your mouth are the most important. That being said, I'm not really sure what would be the best way to approach this. I don't feel right asking opinion questions because that seems so scripted, even with good delivery. Direct is good but I get blown out all the time.
puaninja or anyone else, can you offer me any specific advice?


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 04, 2013 7:18 pm 
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They say that a person knows whether they are attracted to someone within 3 seconds of seeing them. That means that before you even finish your first sentence, the girl has you pegged as a "yes", "no", or a "maybe". Some guys are really fat, ugly, or creepy, and they know it, and girls almost always respond negatively to them. Other guys are good looking, and women generally respond well to them. Guys like me, we are "maybe's" to most women. We aren't their dream guy, but we aren't disgusting looking either, so they'll hear us out if we run good game on them. If you are a "maybe" type guy then girls should at least be hearing you out and not blowing you out right away. If they are, then your opener is jacked up and you need to make some corrections.

That being said, let's start at your opener. Go in with confidence. Be friendly, happy, cool and collected. No goofy stupid shit. No drunken ramblings or nonsense. Engage the whole set and make sure your energy level is higher than theirs, otherwise you will fade away. You don't have to do an opinion opener, but whatever it is that you choose to open with needs some substance to it, or you need a good amount of follow up material behind it.

Here's the thing, you can open with something comedic, but it has to actually get them laughing. You can open with something natural and expected, but it has to turn into something interesting and conversation-worthy. I have a feeling that you jump into the set with a very short and flimsy routine, and the girls quickly start thinking "What's this guy on about?" and then they blow you out. If you did use an opinion opener or did get them really focused on answering some questions or a specific line of dialogue, then you would be able to lock them in better rather then having things rapidly fizzle out.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn


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