Hi All,

Ive just started reading the book "The Game" and its opened my eyes to my shamefulness attempts to picking up. Ive always been scared and affraid of rejection. I WANT TO CHANGE THIS! im sick of been a failure when it comes to women and im looking to do what ever i can about it.

My challenege is i know i can do it but i dont have the confidence and some days i do well and some days i dont. Im a nice guy who has his own values and stuff but that doenst seem to do anything to the ladies. Im aware there is more to it like making them intrigued or something.

Well i want to start of with my first challenge about this girl at WORK. (let me knw if u guyz mix business and pleasure). She was taken out by one of the alpha males at work and it ended in a month or two, Now that she is free from him it seems like she might be attracted to me.

Ive had some moments where she was walking with me and she sorta brushed in close n all i got at least 1 or 2 IOI.BUT, She is a single mom aged 27 with 2 kids =\ And in respect to her i didnt want to do anything because she might be looking to commit wher im just here to have a lil fun. Guys, Tell me if going out with her in that situation is ok or should it just be friends!

I know i can do it but there are other males on her aswell and i feel so pressured my emotions fks me up.

Amr-

ok heres what is happening. you like this girl. ok thats fine. second thing: you are afraid that if you do anything it will compromise your relationship and possibly your job (boy would that be awkward if you had to see her everyday after your move on her... at least thats what your thinking)

heres the problem:

one of the things to remember about pickup is you need to be willing to take losses in order to make gains.

one thing you should NEVER do (ok sometimes... but only sometimes) is mix relationships with work. if you win, then you get the girl and some tricky things happen in the business where you have to fill out forms and stuff. if you lose, things are awkward because you have to see each other and you may get fired for harassment.

my advice is to forget about getting involved with this girl.

that will probably be the hardest thing for you to do but it will be helpful for you in the future both with your job and with your relationships.

if you are like the way i used to be, you will only probably talk to about 5 girls (give or take a few) a day. this girls are usually just co workers anyway so if they have been working with you this long and nothing has happened, they arent interested in you. IOI's or not, nothing is going to happen because in their mind you are the shy/cool/funny/easy going/whatever guy that they work with. especially if there has already been an office romance that hasnt worked out, they probably wouldnt want to mix work and romance together again.

back to my point. if your only seeing around 5 of the same girls a day, that reeeaaalllly limits your chances on meeting new and exciting girls. this results in guys placing all their chips on one girl (who usually has no interest in them) and then they will be unhappy when they dont do anything or when they do something and get rejected.

luckily for you there is another solution. the only problem is it is easier said than done

you need to go out to social gatherings (bars, clubs, get togethers with family and friends, coffee shops during lunch, etc.). once there you HAVE to go and talk to girls. it does not matter at all whether you go up to your first few girls asking if they know the time or just telling them "never mind" and walking away (yes thats what i did lol). you HAVE to go out and battle harden your mind with social interaction with girls. this includes rejection and accomplishments so be prepared. if you get shot down on your first try (like most of us do), just get back up and try again whether it be 5 minutes later or the next day. just dont put it off and procrastinate because thats falling back into your old tracks.

think about it, you are just giving yourself more options.

from there you can make stuff out of it and over time you will be so crafty and confident that you can take any conversation and change it to the point where a woman finds you the most attractive man they have seen that week and is begging you to get in her pants or go out with her (and yes this is true. happened twice last weekend for me).

ok so now you have a new mentality.

erase this from your brain: "i will go to work with few options and hopefully someday something will come out of those few options"

put this in its place: "i will push myself to go out and advance myself. my options will grow to the point where i have to start rejecting women"

now i know this is easier said than done so do yourself a favor and do this for me:

tomorrow - go out and on your lunch break or before or after work, go to a coffee shop/restraunt/bus/train/grocery store/etc and go up to one woman and ask her what the time is. there. you're done. the hardest step is over. THATS IT

the next day - do this with three girls. its no problem right? just the day before you did it with one girl and the world didnt come crashing down.

the next day - do this with five girls. now your starting to feel that approaching women is much easier. your only asking the time but hey... thats way further than most guys can do.

the next day - go to one random girl and whatever she is doing, try and start a conversation. example: if a girl is on a bench reading a paper, ask her a question like "hey do you know who won the game? do you mind if i see the paper and find out?" from there start to talk to her about what she is reading or if she follows sports or whatever. be warned that if it doesnt go to plan just do the same thing the next day and keep doing just one girl a day until something positive happens and becomes more and more natural.

from there on, you will just keep growing exponentially

i hope to hear more from you and your progress on picking up women

just remember to increase your odds of winning and dont be afraid of loss because in reality its more like a sacrifice. you lose some to gain a lot.

best of luck!

~Lucid

Thanks for the reply, It definalty clears a alot of things up for me. Having read what you said im going to take the recommendations u mentioned and apply them to myself 2morow and begin my CHANGE so i can get other important goals done!!

Thanks again , Appriate it.