Ok, someone help me to try and understand this bullshit. This is worse than flaking...

Little over a week ago, this girl (HBQuite) messages me on POF. My profile is straightforward that I'm looking for sex, so our conversation is quick and to the point. I get her number, text her for a day or two, then drive over to her place a week ago. She turns out to be even cuter than her pictures made her seem. We sit on her couch and make small talk for 15 minutes. It's painful because the girl just does not talk. AT ALL. So to end it I kiss her and we start making out. She's completely passive, except she pulls away a few times to tease me. We make out for a while and even though I'm physically escalating, she just sits there with her hands in her lap. Only when I grab her boob does she suggest we go to her bedroom.

So we do, and we make out some more. I took her behavior on the couch to mean that she just wants to get right to it, so I start rubbing and fingering her right away. Eventually we fuck, and it's great. Won't go into explicit details, but I could tell she enjoyed the hell out of it.

That was a week ago. We texted a couple times since then and made plans for Tuesday, but she said she was on her period. So I text her tonight to make plans for Saturday. She invites me over tonight, and I take that to mean her period is over. I get there and she leads me straight to the bedroom. Same scenario as day 1 repeats.

Except as I'm fingering her, out of nowhere she gently removes my hand from her pants and says "The mood just isn't striking me" (weird, because she was moaning not a few seconds before that).

I have absolutely no idea what the fuck that's about. She turns to watch a movie and I doze off trying to figure it out. I wake up half an hour an later, tell her No offense, but if she's not in the mood I'm going to leave. On the way out, I ask if she was okay or if she meant something else by "not being in the mood." She just says "No". So I say I'll see her later, and leave. I don't think she even said goodbye.

Someone PLEASE help me figure this one out, because it's driving me fucking bonkers!! I've never been in the middle of foreplay with girl only to have this shit happen for no good reason (as far as I can tell).

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D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

ASD - Simple, she got emotional and confused.

Their entire being is based on emotion.

Day 1: It's been a while for her, she is pent up, horny. YOU my friend fit the bill, looks, charm, whatever. IT WASN'T about you though, it was about HER! That's why the lack of "talky, talky" and aloofness. She, just like you only wanted to "get off!"

You satisfied her immediate physical need.

Day 2: You both have been building a connection the next few days. Thinking she is horny still and will be much the same, she agrees to meet. Starts out the exact same... she's feelin' it moaning, grinding. But then, SHE starts THINKING! "OMG I don't even know this guy! WTF am I doing?? I'm not slutty! I don't want this guy, or anyone else to think I am!" ANTI SLUT DEFENSE! PUSSY LOCK-DOWN MODE kicks in....DONE!

All you brought to the table was a dick and a smile!

It was possible to pull this out of the hole, but you still did no damage.

But if you want to hit it again, your going to have to pull in some comfort and rapport.

Even a FWB needs to "FEEL special" at least for the moment!

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

Heywood is right. It's buyer remorse because of the lack of comfort and attraction. What you guys started off with was strictly physical only, no emotional connection or attachment. Such type of interaction only fits for one night stand. Even as a fuck buddy, you still need to create enough comfort for the girl to be able to trust you or at least bring amazing values to the table which makes her looking forward to it every time. It's just human nature.

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[O.o] .: Survival Guide For Online Dating
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-"--"-

Shit. Definitely noted. Since she never says fuck-all, I assume she was only interested in sex, but I'll try the talky talky.

In the meantime, should I freeze her out a week, or give it a day or two and go about it as if nothing happened? And when I do, should I push for meeting as usual, or just talk and not mention meeting at all for another day or two?

_________________
D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

This.

You put your finger on it! LMFAO

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They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs.

UPDATE:

Texted her today. Here's the convo:


ME: Congratulations

HER: What for?

ME: I was just thinking of you. Congratulations =)

HER: Haha got ya

ME: What crazy stuff did you get up to this weekend, sugar muffin?

HER: Supercross last night... Heading into work now have a good one!

ME: You too love


I wasn't expecting her to respond, so that's a plus. She's never cut the conversation short like that "have a good one"... but to be fair she does usually work at 2 and hardly texts during that time.

I figure give it a day, then get back to it and set something up again.

_________________
D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

Honestly, the little nicknames are a bit too cutie lovey dovey, if you know what I mean. They feel a bit forced, and in her place i'd be a bit creeped out. I figure you wanted to verbalize your attempt at creating rapport? Nonetheless, she didn't say anything that showed emotional connection to you yet (In that convo at least), so I would have stuck with more cocky funny nicknames like dork, dudette, etc... But maybe i'm misreading the situation

I'll admit they do feel a little forced, but if the girl acknowledges it she usually laughs or thinks it's cute. I got the idea from a StyleLife seminar packet I came across. Maybe I'll try to do without them for a bit and see what changes.

No, there's definitely no emotional connection at the moment. Really hard to establish that when she barely says a goddamn thing. I've met girls where that didn't click with me, or were boring as shit, but they still TALKED. I don't know if I click with this one or not because she hardly talks at all... There's just no way that can be her normal personality around her friends, etc. It almost feels like she's being so distant on purpose, keeping me at arm's length (or football field's length) for some personal reason of her own. That's part of the reason why I went straight to sex the 2nd time instead of talking; I thought she just wasn't interested in getting to know each other. She doesn't betray any emotion.... she's almost impossible to get a read on.

Cooling off for today after the text I posted above. Will text her again tomorrow, see how it goes.

_________________
D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

Well honestly dude, sometime a girl just wants to get laid. Whether it's that situation or not, as long as you have other hotties on the grill, don't worry too much about it. I can't count the times I stopped sleeping with or dating a girl for no reason other than an abstract feeling or fear, so it's not far fetched to think that girls are the same.

After all, you can only work with what she gives you. She doesn't seem the most stable person in the world either, so make sure your home defence system is up to date

Abstract feeling or fear? I'm not sure I follow.

Home defense is probably a good idea. She definitely comes off more than a little weird, but she's cute and the sex so far (one time) has been great.

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D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

What I mean is that I've stopped fucking girls for absolutely no logical reason at all, even though she was cute and the sex was great, maybe that's what happened to you. Maybe she has anxiety issues, or she just doesn't "feel" it anymore. If that's what happened, then there's nothing you can do.

Sorry man, I just can't compute that. Was it because you just had so many other options you got distracted by other girls?


It's possible. I've only hung out with her twice and she definitely did not seem relaxed at all, barely smiled or laughed for whatever reason... except during the sex.

Going to text her again tomorrow, see what's up. I figure if she wasn't interested anymore, she wouldn't have responded yesterday.... then again, I've gone on perfectly great dates with cute girls where we clicked and made out, only to never hear from them again. Shit's enough to drive you insane.

_________________
D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.

I feel your pain dude. It happened to me sometimes in the past too. Perfect date then poof! Especially this girl who I was really clicked, fingered her in the park, could have f-closed her but I didn't want to because I didn't have condoms with me, then never heard from here again. At first, I got frustrated, but eventually I learned to not take it personally. Women are complicated and there can be millions reasons for them to act in such way. I can't control those things so I stopped sweating over it.

_________________
,___,
[O.o] .: Survival Guide For Online Dating
/)__) .:Tips To Significantly Improve Your Online Game
-"--"-

Not necessarily, but this thread isn't about me and my issues

Hope you get her, but otherwise seems like you have quite the little stable, I love reading your hilarious stories haha. GKS is right, after all, there are no certainties in pickup, or at least I don't think so (I guess that would put me in the camp of the pro-naturals if I cared much about the different divisions of seduction), all you can do is skew the odds in your favor, there's no magical 100% effective method, so you lose some and win some.

Yeah, if I had to pick a camp, I'd be pro-natural. I don't have the mind to remember routines and shit, only a few basic lines, frames, and mindsets. I like the interaction to fill in the rest.

Haha, thanks man. I wouldn't call it a stable, but I think I'm finally getting my game back. There's a cutie from POF who lives in Santa Cruz I've been planning to go bang... and just this morning I wake up to a text from her with a picture of her and a friend both naked, fondling each other. Text reads "Would you be down for a 3some?" Hopefully this is going to be one of those times that's a certainty.

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D.G.A.F. isn't just a state. It's a lifestyle.