Hi All,

Posted something similar in the relationships forum but think it might not be the best place so here goes. Long story short - found a HB9 total keeper and been together 18months. Let my guard down and got needy - past 2 months she became distant. Tried keeping the connection with her but I think I pissed her off more - she said she needed space. So I started no contact two weeks ago and nothing heard from her yet, which I'm not hugely surprised about. I'm slightly worried about initiating no-contact because the communication lines are now down altogether..that's the point right...but I have no plan B. Now I know guys will say no contact is for you to get your head back together but I really need to figure out a way to (a) re-open contact and (b) address any of her residual anger because I was needy. Thing is, that she's super-stubborn and if she's pissed off with me, there's no way she'll initiate contact. I need some guidance fast before I do something AFCish like break no-contact.

Thanks in advance,

Lor

The best thing to do is wait and not contact her. Then when you contact her a long time from now come across as very happy and non-needy and just tell her that something reminded you of her that day and you thought you'd say hi. Don't even ask her a question or try to get a response back from her. Just say something nice and see if she responds back on her own.

But it sounds like this girl is done with you for now so I seriously consider soft nexting her at least for a couple months.

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“Nothing is impossible, the word itself says 'I'm possible'!” ~Audrey Hepburn

write down on a piece of paper how you feel about her(not a "im sorry" letter) and then try to explain what you wrote down to her in person, instead of saying something like "i wont do it again, im sorry, will you take me back" admit to acting like a jackass by saying something like "i shouldn't have acted that way, i don't know what i was thinking, and to be honest im embarrassed for being such an ass to you" after you tell her that then you tell her how you feel about her but make sure you don't make the same mistakes and sound needy. and then you pretty much leave the decision up to her if she wants to keep talking to you, but honestly i wouldn't just move on and not say anything if she was my gf, i have too much pride in myself to go out like that and word gets around, so that's how i would handle the situation. i suggest you develop thicker skin and not let things get to you so easily, think before you react and you will be better off. if your instincts are telling you, you shouldn't act a certain way or say a certain thing or should, then they are probably right.

Do really have to get her back?

Or it's just your male ego that tells you that you need to get her back?

If she's in to you, she will at least respond to a contact from you.

Try this once - w/o sounding needy, see if she will respond favorably.

If not, go ahead and fish more!