Sharpening claw's fustrated RECKLESS action packed journal



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PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 9:55 pm 
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Day 53-Bumping into a flake , total inner game change and a weird new fetish...(Friday)

*Just want to point out that i've finished reading "the game" , it's quite a page turner! Now I'm reading "Power of Now" , i can't stress how much this is helping me get rid of the "past demons" that i have! :D

I realise i haven't been updating on the same day anymore , because of procrastination but don't worry it's gone now!!! :D

Importance of state-building

Before i went out today , i watched a bunch of seriously funny youtube troll videos ( seriously type that in troll videos , absolutely hilarious :D ) and i came to a realisation-

-i am enough

Though i've seen this quote from an RSD vid before i drew my own meaning to it. My life was perfectly functional before game , heck i've lived 18 years without women and i didn't NEED them then , i won't NEED them now , it's just a bonus to my lifestyle !

And also , here i was today , absolutely going to town with these youtube vids and realising no one supplied me with this joy but myself. I should just be happy talking to women without getting results as they can't take away my happiness from me.

Onto the daygame!!

Today i definately caught some women looking at me. There was a non-HB i saw and she forced herself to smile at me ( she was shy about i ) as we were walking past each other and i smile back. I look back after a couple steps and realise she's doing the same!! 8) If i was to be calculate what could be the cause it would happen to be a combination of these factors-

-I have a right heel injury from football ( or soccer for the 'Murikans) which causes me to slow down my walk to avoid limping retardedly.

-My legs were chafing oddly enough today even though i'm fuarking skinny! This caused me to adopt a wider stance.

-I've been practising the 'eye smile' alot and had a perma-eye smile today.

-awesome state (I am enough)

-I improved upper body language ( chest out , chin up arms and elbows out ).

THEN

I hit central!! I was warming around until i saw THE Estonian girl. For those who don't know or in the event that i didn't type this , she was someone i daygamed. Very seductive eyes (yellowish green) and was a uni student and part-time bartender. I number closed her and it turned out to be a dude's number. I saw her approximately 3 weeks later from the close. As she walks past me with a HB4 friend i grab her elbow and give her that " don't i remember you from somewhere face and she looks at me weirdly and continues to walk. Oh boy , i wasn't about to give up that easy as i wanted to get to the bottom of it. I physically get right infront of her and-

Me-Hey , wait a minute , don't you remember me?
Her-I can't remember?
Me- I saw you at the bus stop and got your number a couple weeks ago.
Her- Oh now i remember ( bear in mind the whole tone of the conversation was me acting excited that it was nice to meet her and she looked very annoyed that she stumbled into me and had a monotone voice)
HB4- I don't think she remembered you ( i thought she was being a bit*h by i realised she wanted to join in the coversation.
Me-She just said she did.
HB4-I meant earlier.
Me-OH , that's what i thought !! But (focus on her now) when i was trying to text you , a guy replied?
Her-What? (fuc*ing bad actress , she knew about this sh!t)
Me- Yeah !
Her - I don't know ?
HB4 - It could be her dorm mate! She has to TONS of italian guys living with her (jelousy plot , over-emphasis)
Her-Yeah it probably was!!!
* I can't remember what happened afterwards but i became so needy and angry that i eject*

Analysis

I think of all , there was intrigue and interest but the minute i turned needy she picked up on it and decided to make me jelous. As for HER , im still inshock.

I had oneitis for this girl over the christmas period , i always bragged about her to my wing and everything. How could she heartlessly pretend not to recognise me and deny my existance??! How could she give me the cold stare and pretend to want nothing to do with me?? How could she?? HOW COULD SHE??

This seriously kept circling my head for the next 5 mins or so , i physically could not comprehend how this could've occured. We had a nice friendly vibe when i closed her and THIS is what i get in return?? Well she could f*ck herself!!! I don't want her damn number now and everyone else can f*ck themselves too.

I seriously began to adopt this "me against the world" mindset. I mean seriously , most people people i've met have f*cked me over in some way or another ( wether it be socially , physically or mentally) and i literally didn't care about what anyone thought of me then.

She didn't even have any decency to reject me so i was gonna show her what rejection means !!!

So i went on a rejection spree and made myself get reject around 20 times before going home. Needless to say i enjoyed it...abit too much! I destroyed my FEAR OF CROWD and tomorrow i plan to head to china town to break my fear of hitting on asian girls ( this is because i fear they may not speak English) and i plan on getting rejected another 20 times minimum.

SO , i FINALLY cracked the fear of crows and i'll try to keep this momentum going .

AS always , thanks for reading guys , and stay tuned for the next post! :D

Good job brother ;) ^
Thanks bro ! :D


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 13, 2013 11:31 pm 
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Day 55-Even more progress!! ( Sunday )

I didn't get to go to Chinatown yesterday , but i did today !!!!! :D Though i must confess i didn't approach any asians there but more on that later.

Updates

I am really getting a lot of help from "Power of Now" and Kangaroo's intent of "be present" before approaches have had positive effects on me. I still remember when i sarged with NikAFC and i'd be stressed when we missed a beautiful 2-set opportunity and he would calmy smoke his cigarette and as he exhaled looking up , he'd say "Many girls in Central man , many girls" (seriously HOW THE HELL can someone be so cool??)

Intentions i had for today

-warm up.
-Hit on Asian girls alot.
-Get rejected (20 times minimum)
-Stay "present" throughout the sarge and interactions.
-Stay in the conversation as long as possible ( flake rate should reduce , conversation skill should improve (important for rapport building and Day 2 and just in general social ability should improve)
-Self-amusement for rejections! ( force myself to laugh after rejections , so i don't take it seriously)

Central

As usual i hit up Central (this is slowly becoming my favourite place ! :D ) and i warmed up for the first 10 mins or so. I begin to see further trends on approaches. When i make eye-contact from the distance and smile and THEN open as she gets closer , i get more IOI's and positive emotions when i approach through this way. I realised before i used "the creep method of approaching girls"-

The creep method

-Not making eye-contact till last second if she's walking towards you and then SUDDENLY speak as i tap shoulder (shock factor and creepy).
-Not getting right infront when approaching from behind , creating some distance (creepy and shock factor).

The main cause of both of these can just be summed up with "mental masterbation". The "Power of Now" is helping me deal with this and i already stopped the second method as i can fix this instantly.

The approaches

I did around 15 directional warmups , this girl i approached in particular was memorable as she was showing IOI's during our short conversation .I see her come towards me and i make eye-contact and signal from medium range to avoid "the creep effect" . I signal her to stop and then....-

Me-Hi , do you know where *** is?
Her-Yes it's **** , but it's closed now.
Me- really , at this time?
Her- Yes , it's Sunday and most shops are closed at this time? That's too bad , hahah :D .
Me- (abruptly) thank you! *walks away*
Her-Your welcome (i'm already gone by this time)

Analysis

I was not fully "present" during this conversation nor did i hold it for as long as i could. This is why i realised my mistakes about 30 seconds after leaving the conversation and decide to implement my mistake into the next approach. This is also where my warmups end.

HB 9 (Italian nanny)

So this girl looks around 27 and i see her at the next bus stop after the last approach. I hesitate for roughly 7 seconds as this girl is smoking hot! The kind you would seriously fap to. I still approach-

Me-Hi , i was walking past you and thought you look nice.
Her- Thank you :D
Me- *sticks out hand* I'm *** ( being dominant , not asking , introducing instead)
Her-I'm ****
*From here on , we literally have a FULL BLOWN conversation where she talks about her country (Italy) , her job (nanny) , her lifestyle and all , i relate where i can and keep it open ended. She mentions her bf and i try to Strawman theory it , it doesn't seem to work so i just ignore it , i then end up taking her number with the pretext that we go to Starbucks after tomorrow as FRIENDS (plan to escelate on the day) so i hope it turns out well).

Analysis

The only part i fucked up was where i could've insta-dated to Starbucks , but i pussed out , that being said , my pussing out rate is a lot lower than it used to be. I still number closed her despite contemplating leaving after she mentioned a bf.

Miss leaflets (HB 8 English , beautiful green eyes )

This girl was handing out leaflets and shizz , i thought FUC*K IT , and went upto her-

Me- Hi , i saw you , and i think you're cute :D
Her-Thank you! :)
*we have a full blown conversation , in this one i fail conversation wise as it somehow turns into me asking for advise to get a job LOL , nevertheless i stay as long as i could (maybe 15 mins?) and leave after failing ! 8)

Chinatown

Maybe it's because it was a bad day , but when i went MOST people there were couples and stuff and though there were atleast 5 approaches i could've done , i puss out as i fear they may not speak English :oops: .

Afterwards

I get myself rejected 7 times and all them were FUNNY AS HELL!! I really am learning to take rejections lightly and find them real fun , a mood lifter now! 8) .

Intentions (complete or not , y or n)

-warm up.(y)
-Hit on Asian girls alot.(n)
-Get rejected (20 times minimum) (n)
-Stay "present" throughout the sarge and interactions.( n)
-Stay in the conversation as long as possible ( flake rate should reduce , conversation skill should improve (important for rapport building and Day 2 and just in general social ability should improve) (y)
-Self-amusement for rejections! ( force myself to laugh after rejections , so i don't take it seriously)(y)

I think i can see light at the end of the tunel now...i dont fear rejections or the crowd! :D . Though my awareness isn't complete , i definately think i have the capacity to become a man of abundance now and a decisive man . I think meeting the Estonian girl flake became a real revelation! :D

As always thanks for reading guys ! :D Take care and stay tuned for the next post! :D

Claws


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2013 10:29 pm 
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Day 57 (Tuesday) Another game accomplishment and need for balance

Right now , really i should be sarging everyday and really reach for my goals. I have TONNES of free time so there is no excuse! But right now in London it's cold as fack! So it's easy to stay in and read lay reports all day instead...BUT ANYHOW , my dad arrived today from his business trip. I won't go into details , but right now i do NOT get along with my dad and this motivated me to leave the house and SARGE! :D

Intentions i had for today

-warm up.
-Hit on Asian girls alot.
-Get rejected (20 times minimum)
-Stay "present" throughout the sarge and interactions.
-Stay in the conversation as long as possible ( flake rate should reduce , conversation skill should improve (important for rapport building and Day 2 and just in general social ability should improve)
-Self-amusement for rejections! ( force myself to laugh after rejections , so i don't take it seriously)

Nightgame

I realise the last couple times i went out , it was not daygame but NIGHTGAME. As i am getting lazier , i leave later and later. Either that or It's just getting darker faster as it's winter. The rules for nightgame is slightly different from daygame according to what i have read (please correct me if i'm wrong). In daygame so far , i could just close in a min or two without much rapport (this is ironically the reason why i'm getting flaked almost 100% at the time , just pushing for number and not interested in the girl).

However , in the last couple times , i have been building my rapport building skills and as you can see i do not plan on premature ejections

-mac is fucked so will continue tomorrow.... :oops:


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PostPosted: Tue Jan 15, 2013 11:45 pm 
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Keep it up man your crushing it!

Yes you are getting lazier lol, the shortest day I think is December 21st.

Eyrie

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My journal: eyrie-s-journal-to-becoming-the-man-vt148355.html

--If you are not giving, you are not living--


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 9:42 pm 
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Day 57 , Tuesday (continuation)

As i've said earlier , i stopped prematurely ejecting. Completely. I've also been hanging out with my friends alot more , to keep my social gears turning and keep my out of the house ! :D

Since last week , i've also been trying to improve my conversation skills , building rapport and it's been successful!

The bus

I remember taking the bus and as i was reading lay report (really should stop this) i realised it was my stop and also realise i had a fully grown boner!!! :oops: I then contemplated taking my jacket off to hide my embaressment but realised "why should i compromise myself in this weather (cold as fuark!) just to save face from a bunch of people i won't see again?"

So i got up and proudly got off (albeit getting a few stares) with my boner silhouette revealed in my loose trousers.

Approaches

I remember making about 6 approaches today. This was mainly due to the length of the approach (15-30 mins approx). The basic flow of the approaches went like this-

Me-*insert complement and explains intentions*
Her-*thanks , blablabla*
Me-*Asks open ended question about herself*
Her-*Answers*
Me*rinses and repeats , gets to really know the girl and attempts to number-close with a day 2 seeded after a good while.
Her-Boyfriend objection.

Analysis

I realised i didn't have ANY escelation here whatsoever nor did i exude anything sexual whatsoever. I would sum up my approaches as a "chatty 12 year old". This is because whilst i was making good conversation , i would still be seen as "aww isn't that BOY cute" , a similar scenario being when a toddler complements the aunt and the aunt finds the toddler cute. I was NOT being spoken to like a man. I hope escelation and being sexual may fix this issue

Intentions i had for today

-warm up. (complete)
-Hit on Asian girls alot. (fail)
-Get rejected (20 times minimum) (fail)
-Stay "present" throughout the sarge and interactions. (somewhat complete , could've improved)
-Stay in the conversation as long as possible ( flake rate should reduce , conversation skill should improve (important for rapport building and Day 2 and just in general social ability should improve) (complete)
-Self-amusement for rejections! ( force myself to laugh after rejections , so i don't take it seriously) (complete)


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 10:20 pm 
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Day 58 , wednesday -sticking point and beautiful asses

So today i went out to improve being sexual (sticking point) and i also wanted to REALLY stay present and feel the power of NOW! :D

Sarging

As it's winter here in London , the weather's damn cold!!! I just cannot fix my body language as the cold makes me all huddled up ! But anyhow , i get on the bus and see a beautiful ass infront of me. It was seriously beautiful but i was on autopilot mode as i usually don't approach till i reach central , however when i get off my stop , i realise she does too...

I open and talk and realise she is Spanish and seriously can't speak a lick of English , i don't even bother investing time into this one and eject. I then spot a cute girl walking towards me and i open. She smiles and as i begin talking i see a bus go past us and she says "sorry , gotta go" and runs for it. (she makes it too :evil: ). I cross the road and see ANOTHER cute girl and i open and she says "thanks but i've really got to go"

Analysis

Well first of all , i'm proud of GOING for it. Rejections really not even a big deal anymore. I've approached 3 girls in like a minute. This was seriously some kinda record for me though LOL.

The flow carries on and i do approaches that end similarly to the above until i open this girl coming towards me. Sh says she has to go , but her body language is saying otherwise. She hasn't moved a step and is looking at me. I tell her to have a good night...I later realise she wanted me to convince her to stay and carry on LIKE A MAN but i failed a very basic shit test here.

Later i spot a girl with the most beautiful proportions , she's 5'11ish like me , BEAUTIFUL ass ( first thing i noticed from behind , stacked rack and a beautiful face with a gorgeous smile. I open her and SHE takes out her hand and we introduce ourselves. She then tells me she has to go. Learning from my previous mistake i time-constraint her and she then tells me she is meeting her boyfriend and leaves giving me a smile.

Analysis

I realise this girl gets hit on ALOT and she knows exactly what she's doing. She introduces herself to disarm me and then gently turns me down with a smile leaving her ego-stroked and in a better mood. I genuinely don't have a clue how to deal with such a high-level target so i hope it's something i learn with experience.

Later on i spot a light brown HB with a beautiful smile and full lips at the bus stop. I open with "Hi , i think you look real nice and came to say hi" she then in a geeky way puts up her hand and says hi. I manage to keep the conversation flowing and draw the passion card(thanks ,whoever told me about this). I tease her and there and things are really looking up. She begins to really open to me when her bus arrives and says "sorry got to go".

Analysis

This was probably my best approach of the night as i did real well and managed to hold a conversation without her running to "her boyfriend". I recognise there is still potential that this may be due to the fact that she is at a bus stop and has to wait there till her bus comes. The bus objection happened twice today so i will have to gear up and prepare for how to stop this from blocking the interaction.

I realised i also didn't even warm up today as i just dived into it. This didn't hinder me at all so i just kept going 8) .

Sticking points.

-Escelating.
-Being sexual.
-Dealing with "the boyfriend objection".
-Dealing with the bus cutting the interaction prematurely.
-Fear of Asian girls (will explain below).

Asian girls

I realise i genuinely worry about approaching Asian girls. This is due to these self-limiting beliefs-

-I worry they may not speak English (lots of tourists here)
- I worry they may not be into black guys (genuine self- limiting belief).

How can i deal with these self-limiting beliefs as i genuinely have more fear approaching an asian girl , than a 10/10 HB . I have already approached more than a dozen "10/10" but only a single asian so far (see korean girl at the begining of my journal somewhere).

Final thoughts

I feel i'm really progressing here ! :D Though i've read that the fear of approach will always be there , i would say compare to last week i feel maybe 10% of "fear of crowd" and "fear of rejection" due to my self-amusement technique that i've been using. I genuinely find rejections funny now and always laugh when it happens. I hope i can deal with these sticking points efficiently so i reach a new level of game and closer to my goals stated at the begining of my journal! :D

That's it for today! :D As always , thanks for reading guys and stay tunes for the next post! :D


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 10:21 pm 
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Keep it up man your crushing it!

Yes you are getting lazier lol, the shortest day I think is December 21st.

Eyrie
Thanks for the motivation dude!! And yes , i should leave earlier haha it gets dark far too quick nowadays!


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PostPosted: Wed Jan 16, 2013 11:23 pm 
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From a fellow black guy to another... well done! :-)

I'm liking these posts of yours and I'm tracking your progress with keen interest.

Keep going!!

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"They call me Hitman"


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 10:15 pm 
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From a fellow black guy to another... well done! :-)

I'm liking these posts of yours and I'm tracking your progress with keen interest.

Keep going!!
Thanks man haha , it's tough since my wing is so lazy so i'm 99% of the time sarging purely solo , so that's very encouraging to hear !! :D


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PostPosted: Thu Jan 17, 2013 11:06 pm 
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Day 59-Thursday - state messing up and finally approaching an Asian!

So today i was actually meant to go with my wing , he is lazy as fuark though ! In the 6 weeks i've known him i only sarged with him twice !! Today he bailed because of cold weather , so i procastinte a litltle as i wasn't planing on going alone. I end up leaving my house a little late because of this.

The journey

So i take the bus ride and keep reading lay reports on the way. I get off

Central

I warm up a little , but i just wasn't feeling my state. My state at that time was-

-being rejection free.
-"being alpha".
-being sexual.

This was actually very bad for me as i wanted to be rejected alot but reading the lay report made me "prideful" and aiming for something a little like this-

-BAM 30 sec n-close.
-BAM 3 min k-close.
-OMG SNL in 30 mins?!?!?!

Basically i wanted to be someone i'm not. I realised this after wasting 90 mins or so. I then spot a gorgeous ASIAN HB and i forced myself to approached-

Gorgeous Asian HB 8

Me- Hi, y-
Her-No.

...Just like that. I didn't even get a chance to open lol and got shut down :oops: . This made me have even more fears of approaching Asian girls. It was the first time i got rejected before i even said two words literally. I then mentally masterbate for even more , but i was determined not to go home until i break this wall. I then see a HB-redhead with gorgeous blue eyes. I was suddenly reminded of Swedish HB (see first ever post) and i approach!

Me-Hi !
Her-*takes off headphones* Hi! :D
Me- I saw you walking past me and i just wanted to say you have the most gorgeous eyes! And i wanted to say hi!
Her-Thank you , that's actually a really nice thing to say ! :D
Me-What's your name?
Her- I'm ***
Me I'm **** *shakes hands*. So what are you upto?
Her-Just on my way to meeting my boyfriend. *stays , smiling*
Me- *holds shoulder* , ok have fun ! :D

Analysis

I think this girl may have been interested as usually they scurry off after saying that sentence. She was smiling and looked as if that complement genuinely made her day. I really have no idea what to say if a girl says she's meeting her boyfriend so i don't know how i could've progressed from there. I'll have to research the boyfriend objection as usually when i Strawman theory them , they just agree and smile...

On a side note i realise the line " *insert compliment* and i just wanted to come say hi" is a very good opener that ALWAYS gave me a good open (though i screw up afterwards). This may be because it removes the creepy element as girls are used to guys just watching them so it may be refreshing to see a guy put in effort.

After this i make a few unmemorable approaches , nothing special.

Callibration

This is a new section i created. This is the section where i REALLY look into my problems so i can gear up better for the next sarge. First of all , my STATE i should focus on these aspects more-

-staying present (didn't happen today at all)
-focusing on being social (didn't happen today)
-focusing on self-amusement (also didn't happen)

I realise my state was MUCH better yesterday than today. Yesterday was very fun for me whilst today felt like a chore. I'm happy to have seen that beautiful redhead though today , really reminded me of the Swedish HB.

Next time - NO MORE LAY REPORTS!!! :evil: Seriously if a mod is reading this , can you PLEASE lock me out of the lay reports sections? It'll really help me focus !! I'll re-focus on my STATE for tomorrow.

That's it for today guys! :D As always thanks for reading guys ! :D And stay tuned for the next post! :D


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PostPosted: Fri Jan 18, 2013 11:57 pm 
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Day 60 - Freezing my ass off and ANOTHER realisation (friday)

So today i literally approached like twice. I'll be direct and say the snow affecting me far too much-

-very hard for me to stay "in the now" if i have to take my mind elsewhere to ignore the cold.
-everyone in general was in a rush so difficult for me to approach.
-my body language was at it's worst today (tucked in neck , hunched back , hunched shoulders . hands turned into fists and crossed arms) . This was due to the weather.

Today was chaos in general , most places closed and everyone was in a rush to get home. I tried not to be lazy and stay inside as this would only create a cycle of procrastinating.

The sarge

There was almost no HBs by themselves today . I've managed to approach twice today though.


HB 8

This girl was Spanish tourist and didn't speak a lick of English. I still went direct and ejected though.

HB 8 Latvian

I went to Mcdonald's to warm my body up quickly and as i left i saw a gorgeous girl walking along the road. I just kept the momentum and approached-

Me- Hi, i saw you walk past me , i thought you were cute and wanted to say hi.
Her-sorry?
Me-You speak English??
Her-Yes.
ME-*repeats sentence*
Her-LOOOOL! :D
Me- What's your name?
Her-I'm ***
Me-I'm ****
Her- nice to meet you *shakes hand*
Me- You have an accent , where you from?
Her-Latvia , i'm in a rush though , i have to go!
Me- ok , bye! *waves*
Her-*waves*

She speeds past me and i carry on the same direction towards the bus stop to go home. I realise she's there too so re-open-

Me-I though you were in a hurry to go somewhere?
Her-Yes , i have to check the bus timetable.
Me- Ah i see....

At this point i decide to completely ignore her , i really don't even see the point in talking to her so i turn my back to her. After sometime the bus comes and she re-opens.

Her-This your bus?
Me-Yes.
Her-Okay bye! :D

Analysis

To me , at the beginning , it just felt like politeness , then when i re-engaged it felt like she lost interest completely. Then i completely freeze her out since i wasn't gonna put her on a pedestal and THEN she gained interest.

Online gaming

I've been using a "tested" canned opener of " I would change your profile pic" and i got 7 initial replies , i then say it's a joke and no reply yet. I also tried this canend opener -

hey, i saw your profile ..and um...well, i thought i'll write. well, seems from your profile that you like making friends....anyhow, if you not keen on being friends...stop reading here and delete this message! however, if you keen on making friends, can you tell me about yourself?? like.....

what is your greatest quality or trait?

if money wasnt an issue and you could visit any place , where would it be and why?

which animal do you most relate to?

if you could acquire a certain skill without the risk of failure or without putting any effort, what skilll would you acquire and why?

what movie or book do you like most?

whats your greatest passion in life?

ok..last question.....kinda weird, but what do you think of your nose??!!....................... lol...its good..i like it..seems to give you a personality! anyhow.....

laters,

****"

This yielded 2 responses but those 2 were MUCH more invested. I've only had this account for 8 hours or so. Ideally i would like to gain some dating experience out of this as i haven't experienced any day 2's yet. I should broaden my spectrum more will be using online gaming at home and sarging outside to maximise getting experience.

Now i will be typing up the 2 month review to analyse my goals and where i'm currently at.


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 19, 2013 12:34 am 
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2 months game analysis

So i've been in game for two months...I'ts been quite awhile. To be honest due to "Power of Now" i've been feeling consistently happier , i dwell on the past maybe 10% of what i used to? I'm still a beginner in terms of practising the now , but this is a really good direction i'm heading towards . So "dealing with past demons" is pretty much COMPLETE.

I want to now use this moment to look at my objectives from Day 1-

Say hello /ask directions , 3 new people a day
FEEl like a man.
Be decisive.
Be confident in my own skin.
Gain abundance and stop oneitis.
n-close. (within this week).
k-close.(within 2 weeks).
f-close(within a month.)

So far , i still don't feel like a man.

Am i decisive? That depends. If i see a girl i will approach if i'm warmed up , otherwise i don't. I still don't use high risk moves though in fear of scaring the girl away.

Am i confident in my own skin? Closer than 2 months ago but i'm still not.

Gained abundance and stop oneitis? NO.

I have maybe 40 or so numbers in total now , all of them other than one maybe (guitar girl , she's got exams and all now so i'm waiting for her to finish) but so far it didn't do SH!T for me...all flakes.

K-close? NO. This was definately possible if i was to have carried on with guitar girl and not eject. There were also other oppertunities but i pussed out.

f-close? NO. So far it's 8 oppertunities i pussed out on. Seriously , how do i stop pussing out and stop playing safe?

Game analysis

Now i wanna analyse my actual infield game.

Opening

My openers are decent now , rarely get rejected/ejected just based on my opener.

Mid-game

This is the issue here. I think i'm playing far too safe and easy. As in after the opener , i go straight for the name , then try to instantly pry her life as fast and as much as possible. I'm not FUN or a CHALLENGE. This is something i should really work on. Based on these two factors it's clear why women keep flaking. NO women likes a boring man. I will need to improve on this alot.

I also fail almost every shit test given to me. "i have a boyfriend" , "sorry , i'm in a rush" are the most popular and i haven't figured a way to counter this yet.

I really do need to do my homework and fix this up.

Endgame

Well i don't escalate as i keep playing safe. I just use the standard close 'what is your number' and i try to stay in set as long as possible till target leaves.

Final thoughts

It just dawned on me today that i was missing the key ingriedients for pickup -FUN and CHALLENGING . I will read up on how to be more like that instead of being the regular nice guy that women are bored out of their wits from.

Thank you for reading guys and hope you guys have some answers to offer :D !


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PostPosted: Sun Jan 20, 2013 1:32 am 
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Joined: Mon Nov 19, 2012 6:57 pm
Posts: 194
Location: London
Day 61 -A glimpse of feeling like a man.

So today i chose a bad location to game , not many people around ( not many people in general these days due to weather) but i my game 'style'. I realised , reading my very FIRST report with the Swedish girl and how i was number closing her. It felt so genuine and real. These days , it feels very impersonal and i feel i'm just going through the motions ( name , ethnicity, job , hobby etc) and i haven't felt a REAL connection since then ( guitar girl maybe but that's it).

These last couple sarges definately felt as if i was imposing on them and the conversation not natural at all. So i tried to change that today by-

-Having a calm , slow tone.
-EMPHASIS on relaxed body language.
-Not pushing a conversation , rather , let it flow.

All of this is so the girl feels at ease and more comfortable. This is also what i did on the first day. With that in mind i did a couple of approaches like this , all were in a hurry ( who can blame them, look at the weather today :shock: ) but the most important one of the WEEK was this-

HB 8.5 ( English , skinny ~5'10)

So as i was walking along the road there was a beautiful girl walking out of a bar , sitting on the curb. I don't even allow myself time to think and go-

Me-Hey , you look like your tired sitting down there in this weather.
Her-Hey , yeah i'm just taking some fresh air out here.
Me-Yeah it certainly is 'fresh' in this weather (it's freezing)
Her-hahaha yeahhhh. :)
Me-What are you drinking by the way?
Her-Water.
Me-....
Her-AHAHAHHA what?! :D
Me- Never mind ! :D . I came because i saw you and thought you looked nice and wanted to say hi.
Her- Aww thank you , hi! I'm ****
Me- I'm ****
Her- Nice to meet you.
Me-Nice to meet you. So what are you upto tonight?
Her-*something about her friend going away* What about you?
Me- *Bs's about meeting friends to club*
Her-Well it's really freezing now , i can feel the cold! *stands upto go inside* It's nice to meet you *i'm already walking away at this point* and hope you meet your friends and have fun tonight!
Me- You too!

Analysis

In this conversation i remember seeing a glimpse of vulnerableness as she was telling me how her friend was leaving the country. I did not force the conversation throughout this conversation at all. The vibe was very relaxed. This girl showed far too many IOI's that i got scared if i'm being honest here. She introduced herself , told me personal stuff and was kind of expecting a number exchange towards the end.

I think the issue is indifference. Over the last two months , i have developed a fairly strong immune system towards rejection ( except for asian girls but that's a different topic) and it may have been messing me up. I genuinely didn't care at that MOMENT if i was gonna number close or not. I got scared that i built a genuine connection with this girl and i seem to run away whenever there's a real possibility of something happening. What to do with this? I don't have the answer.

That being said , i felt a glimpse of being a man. That moment where she was telling me all this stuff about her friend , how she ended up trying to keep me interested. I felt a genuine connection but i fu*ked up.

Tips for next time

-Stay truly natural and don't try to FORCE a conversation


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2013 2:15 pm 
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Joined: Mon Nov 19, 2012 6:57 pm
Posts: 194
Location: London
OK , i have been very busy / lazy (probably the latter LOL) and so i haven't been typing as often as i like so i will type all the events from monday to today Saturday in one go , here goes!


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PostPosted: Sat Jan 26, 2013 3:09 pm 
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Joined: Mon Nov 19, 2012 6:57 pm
Posts: 194
Location: London
Day 62 , Monday - A massive social day (snowfight)

So today it was snowing heavily in London and my friend texts me for a snowfight. He tells me so far a nice couple are going (friendly) , a dude (he's cockblocking AMOG) , the hottest girl in college (literally) and him.

I seriously contemplate staying but i quickly confide in 3 buddies from this site. All tell me to GO so i do. When i arrive i see a bunch of teen girls at the park and i open them asking if they came for a snowfight. They open very warmly since i was just being cool. They tell me they aren't but told me they spotted another group at another spot in the park. I thank them and go there for 1.30pm

I realise there were two of my buddies there and two girls i haven't met before. One was a short fat girl and the other was medium thin ( very cute) , had a very uniquely charming look about her. I go in , shouting my buddies' names loudly and make a dramatic entrance , giving them both bro-hugs (yes, this does exist) and by the time i'm done the girls are laughing their assess off! The short fat girl telling my friend "OMG , he's SO funny! (YES , DHV already!! 8) )

I didn't even wait to be introduced and just went and introduced myself. They warmly introduce themselves. I turn to talk to my buddy about how the timings slightly messed up and not everyone here. The thin girl asks for my name again. I tell her and then decide to engage the group to feel out how everyone knows each other. They both tell me they both knew the short fat girl already and just met her friend. The short fat girl claims she knows me too?!?! I ask where from. I must've added her MSN when i was 14 and she must still remember me?!?! This is seriously crazy as i don't have a clue who the hell this girl is!!! :shock:

I was being very open and accepting of everyone. On a side tangent i have been reading Lawl's values of a man. I remember on day 7 or something he recomended but was too lazy to read it. I read it the day before the snowfight and i was HOOKED! This is why i was being accepting of everyone and not write-off anyone who i didn't like. I realise the cute girl kept talking to me on the side whilst i was social with everyone.

I keep talking to her , actually giving her eye-contact and paying her attention. I realise my friends were trying hard to befriend them , ONLY saying nice things and refusing to voice their own opinions. I on the other hand was just acting like a total social clown LOL! For example my buddy was talking to me and cutie and was telling me how there's a pole dancing course and i joked about how "Isn't pole dancing a second-nature kinda thing??"

He says you need forearm strength blablabla and i just go " If i see a pole , you'll just see me grab and go boom boom ( thrusting my hips to and imagenary pole) . They both laugh. My main aim was to be FUN and light-hearted , not Mr. Hollier-than-thou-factoid. It seems to be really paying off!! So we all go to a foodshop whilst waiting for everyone for snowfight. Cutie and i build a TON of rapport and comfort. She hints she's single for two years and she spent £300 pounds approx on her last boyfriend. Our hobbies , interest and sense of humour are very linear. I could only apply social kino here though (high fives , hugs and all that).

We've been hanging around as a group for like 2 hours in which i mainly spoke to the cutie as one of my friends and fat girl were busy being presents or something and the fat girl was being rude as fuark for some reason??? Despite 5 mins ago saying like "i feel like i've known you for such a long time" so i make a fat joke (can't even remember what it was , something abut oiling her and rolling her down the aisle) and everything laughs. She looks kinda upset.

I was seriously mind fuarked. Why the hell would an easily upset , insecure girl even attempt to insult me ?!?! Not in an arrogent way but surely if your the type to easily get upset why try that shizz!?!?!??
Anyhow after hanging for like 2 hours , the girls leave saying they'll be back at like 4pm. We hug them both goodbye and we go back to the park.

Snowfight

We spot a group of guys of whom i only know 2 of them ( about 14 in total there) and i just dive into it introducing myself to everyone. They were real cool , even the hot girl! Though i thought she wasn't as hot as everyone was making her out to be ( maybe a 7.5?). Though this could be due to months of opening impossibly hot girls!!

The next part was a blur of me getting in a few sentences here and there as snowballs were being thrown EVERYWHERE , no chance to speak ! The guy i thought was an AMOG was in reality just a really cool guy. Then after awhile an old buddy of mine from MMA comes along.

He was a real alpha. I don't like using this phrase , but he was. He was tall , had a Steven Seagal look to him with his hair tied . He instantly got respect the minute he walked in , he didn't neg anyone or anything. It just HAPPENED. He is really friendly and cool but people know to fuark with him , though he wasn't even being aggressive. I was mirin. He was closer to a MAN than i was for sure. Though he was two years younger than me , he looked two years OLDER than me!!

Time goes on in this confusing snowfight and it turns to 4pm. We had to meet the girls so i make i point to bro-hug all the guys and hug all the girls one by one and then we leave. We meet them at the bus stop and i thew a snowball at the fat girl as a joke (she got me earlier) and it hits her eye!!! This was gold and we all laugh about it. I realise we were heading into town for KFC and we were all going EXCEPT for the cutie. I realise she just lived nearby and was dropping off her off!!! I forgot to get her number as we had to get the bus in a hurry ( big mistake , i knew where we were heading should've just took the next one) and i didn't close her!!!! :evil:

On the bus ride , social networking becomes the conversation and i pick up cutie doesn't have a FB so i'm screwed in closing her ! Later on she gets off and us boys just go KFC and hang out with more friends and then we go our seperate ways. I realise the best alternative was to get the fat girl's FB and try to get cutie's number off her.

I later sarge around a bit , but i was really feeling off! I didn't close anyone and didn't seem to be able to build any momentum! Until i spot the light brown HB at ( see day 58) the same bus stop!! I open her and she's happy to see me , this time however i KNOW what bus she's taking and as i'm taking my phone out , a woman bumps into her , confusing her and trying to take her oyster card ( a bus card) and the bus comes so i fail...again!!! :evil: I'm sure i will bump into this girl again so next time i will take the number ASAP on the basis that we hang out again! I make a couple direct approaches after this. I'm happy being able to be direct without any hesitation now ! :D

Claws


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